Is a destination wedding right for me?

[jesswins]

Hi,

I have been engaged for 5 months and have yet to make real wedding plans that excite me. However a few days ago my uncle mentioned Cabo and I have been excited ever since. I have been to Cabo 4 times and have always had a wonderful time. The only problem I have is what will other people think. I need to believe that this is my day and I should celebrate it the way I want to. Has anyone else had similar feelings of what will relatives or friends think about a destination wedding?

[cessyboston]

i am sure you will find the same story on here...you will have so much support from the girls....you do what makes you two happy... good luck its sounds like cabo makes you happy .......

[TammyWright]

hi jess,

 

this is tammy...i think i may have been talking to your aunt. read some review, can look at pics to see if a DW is the right choice for you.

 

here are some reviews: http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/f77/

 

some wedding pics: http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/f76/

 

and the cabo wedding section: http://bestdestinationwedding.com/forum/f59/

[CourtneyV]

Simply put - yes!

 

First of all... I got engaged last June and didn't start planning until this February!! I mean, I had ideas of what I wanted to do and maybe where I wanted to go... but I didn't feel incredibly motivated to research it. I can't even explain why - I'm excited about my engagement, but it was hard to get the ball rolling.

 

And yes, family HEAVILY impacted decisions I was making... and honestly, still does a bit. Not even immediate family, but I would start thinking, "Well, aunt Barb might not like this, or uncle John might not like that". Maybe that's why i found it so discouraging at first... how do you please everyone?

 

I think it helped to talk to my FI about it. What were our priorities? What did WE really want in our location? Even writing it down could help. Then maybe you'll start getting a little more excited/motivated when you start imagining your wedding with you FI.

[Lori]

I felt that I was being selfish at first. But the wedding is about you and your new husband. If it brings joy to you and your future hubby it can't be wrong.

[-Kate-]

You are totally normal for feeling this way. Most brides have issues with family/friends when they decide to do a DW. It comes with the territory.

 

You just need to think about what you want for your wedding. When you close your eyes and imagine your perfect wedding, what comes to mind? If it's you and your FI on a beach, by a waterfall, etc. - go DW. If the first thing you think of is a large group of your family and friends being there with you, maybe a DW isn't for you.

 

No matter how understanding your family and friends are, there will be fewer present because it is a DW. After being on this forum for about 9 months and reading a ton of posts, I can say I have one of the most supportive group of guests a DW bride could want. And even with that, there are still people who can't come. Some are pregnant and won't be allowed to fly by that point, some can't afford it. These are normal guest "casualties" when you have a DW. If that is something you are ok with - go DW.

 

Welcome and good luck!!!

[MikkiStreak]

I first heard of destination weddings about 10 years ago when a cousin in my birth-family took her immediate family to Jamaica and got married. I thought that was just the coolest thing and fell in love with the idea of just grabbing a small handful of close friends and family and heading off somewhere for a wonderful extended weekend.

 

After having announced our plans and having had the word spread through the grapevine, I can say that even tho we are firm with our decision to have an 'untraditional' wedding out of the country, I think it would have helped me if someone had told me to really think about what the reaction would be from extended family. And not in a vague way---- like reading about it on here and thinking our family wouldn't react like "that". Well, they did.

 

Don't get me wrong---- I'm not trying to dissuade you from this idea. I am still just as committed to getting married outside in a vacation setting as I have been for the last 10 years. But, when you start to hear negative things and judgement from people you care about, it kind of zaps the joy out of planning your wedding momentarily. For me, I wish I would have been better prepared for that so maybe it wouldn't have bothered me as much as it has.

 

Really, this is the only downside I've found so far---- but to me, it's worth it. I just have to remind myself that these are people who are set in their ways and they were going to find something to complain about...

[TammyWright]

if this is the niece of B then i think alot of your guests would be cool with the idea...especially if you are already in so. cal...it is such a quick trip for you.

[KAMEYER70]

If you are worried about guests that can not afford the trip to Cabo, you could always plan a small reception (maybe cocktails only) for after you return. That way you give people an option. Good luck!

[KAMEYER70]

Quote:

Originally Posted by LALA You are totally normal for feeling this way. Most brides have issues with family/friends when they decide to do a DW. It comes with the territory. You just need to think about what you want for your wedding. When you close your eyes and imagine your perfect wedding, what comes to mind? If it's you and your FI on a beach, by a waterfall, etc. - go DW. If the first thing you think of is a large group of your family and friends being there with you, maybe a DW isn't for you. No matter how understanding your family and friends are, there will be fewer present because it is a DW. After being on this forum for about 9 months and reading a ton of posts, I can say I have one of the most supportive group of guests a DW bride could want. And even with that, there are still people who can't come. Some are pregnant and won't be allowed to fly by that point, some can't afford it. These are normal guest "casualties" when you have a DW. If that is something you are ok with - go DW. Welcome and good luck!!!

This is a good point about fewer guests... But in our case, we have a 90% acceptance rate. We thought we would save $$ in Cabo because people would not want to take the time off, travel or spend the money to get there. Unfortunately, that is not the case. So, our estimated guest list of 50 is already at 72. That being said, we are floored that so many of our family and friends will be there and we can't wait to celebrate with everyone!