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Ok so here is my situation. My cousin was in my wedding party and just recently told me via text message that she can no longer afford to go to my wedding. She did help plan my shower, but i think she has given up on the bach. party. So, I bought tiffany necklaces for the BM's and differnt goodie for their OOT bags. Do I still give her the bag and the necklace? I do love her, but at the same time I feel like I spent a lot of money to be so disappointed and needless to say via text! What would you do?

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I think you should tell her it hurt your feelings that she told you via text, but that you understand (if you truly do, which it sounds like you do). I would try and talk to her about the situation and ask if there is anything you can do to help. Since you already purchased the items and it sounds like your cousin wanted to come and has done other stuff for you but truly cannot make it, i would give them to her.

 

Do you have someone else that will be standing in? If so, you could give the stuff to them?

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I think Josie is right...you should tell her that texting may not have been the best way to communicate the information to you, but that you understand where she is coming from, and that if she could afford to be there for you she would. Unless you have someone you can ask to stand in for her, I would still offer the gifts to her.

I had one of my best friends back out because she moved to South Africa and didn't want to commit herself to something that she wasn't sure she would be able to afford in a year. There were no hard feelings on either end (although she did 'avoid' me for two weeks b/c she didn't know how to tell me), and I know that she has tons of love and support for us, just like I am sure your cousin has for you.

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