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Meredith,

I am sorry to hear about your situation. It sucks to have your FI and MIL change their mind. We are not having AHR because we just can't afford it. We could have a BIG wedding with everyone back in Baltimore but that's just not what we wanted. I do think a small party with people who want to come for Mardi Gras and see you guys all at the same time can work out. You can show all your wedding pictures and just PARTY. It doesn't have to an official AHR.

Hopefully you can make up your mind and don't stress out about this anymore. You have the wedding to plan!!!
 

Originally Posted by dstinationdrmr View Post

Ok Ladies, I'm finally caught up since I was gone. It took me 3 days!! Lol.

 

In the past week FI and I have come to the decision that we will probably not have an AHR as we planned. I'm kinda bummed but kinda relieved at the same time. I feel like it was too much for me to plan and the fact that it was going to be Mardi Gras weekend, things were just really pricey. We would have spent the money we saved doing a DW on the AHR. Also, FI spent the week at home vitising his parents and they said that they thought it was too much to have to come to MX in Nov then have to turn around and come to N.O. in March. I kinda understand this, but at the same time I'm a little disappointed in this. FI and I have been living together for 3 years and not once have they been to visit. I think it's because his mom isn't keen on our pre-marital living arrangement but that's just specualtion. We could be living in a matchbox for all they know. I'm ok with not having a huge party. I was always fine with just having our wedding in MX and calling it a day. FI and his mom were the ones pushing to have an AHR because a lot of their family will not be there.

 

Anyway, now I'm torn because we put it in everyone's heads that we were going to do something that weekend. We even paid a deposit on the venue. Now, some people that I wanted to be involved in some way aren't going to be involved at all, i.e. my grandmother and uncle. We still wanted to do something but if his parents and possibly his BM won't be there I think it's a little pointless. So, one of our thoughts is to just do something like a bbq or a random party but not necessarily have that be connected to our wedding. I feel that this would be a fun idea especially since it will be Mardi Gras weekend. Or we can have an AHR for our one year anniversary. Any thoughts? Anyone going thru something similar?



Amy,

Thanks! I will have to search for the forum. I have started the list but got nowhere yet. This is one item I am procrastinating on. Not the most exciting part of the planning for me.
 

Originally Posted by amybermuda View Post


Welcome Michelle!  My 1st piece of advice is to get a good Travel Agent!!!  One that specializes in DWs or group travel.  Glad you found the forum; it will keep you sane ;)


Chong, There are a couple good threads on BDW where people have placed their song lists.  Do a search.  Do you have enough posts to download?  My "last song" of the night was Take a Chance on Me by ABBA.  Everyone loved it.
 

Quote:


Meredith, Who are you having your AHR for?  If his parents are coming to Mexico, then the AHR is not for them, right?  Are there guests who are not able to come to Mexico you really want to celebrate with?  Can they come to NO?  I really wanted my 90 year old grandpa to be there -- he was able to make an hour or so in Maryland -- so it was worth it to me.

 

I have to be honest here, while I had a great time at my AHR, it was a bit anti-climatic.  I don't regret having an AHR, I am just saying after my wedding was over I was a little relieved that it was over - and then I had to do the AHR stuff...  The week of, I was really excited, but the weeks leading up to it was more of a chore.

 



Dani,

Thanks! I will look for your list sometime in the future.
 

Originally Posted by daniepps View Post





I paid about $15 for my dress to be cleaned.  I sent them the dress on Fri and told them the wedding was on Sat at 3.  My bridesmaids send their dresses on Friday and got them back on Friday so I called to check on mine and they told me it would be ready on Saturday at 3!  I guess they were under the impression that I didn't need the dress until 3pm so if anyone does use them make sure they're clear on when you need it.  After I spoke with them they did end up having it ready by 11am and it looked fine to me.

 



The wedding was scheduled for 3pm and I was late of course so it started around 3:40.  The temps had to be in the mid 90s and it was super sunny!  It didn't cool down during the reception either (but then again maybe that could be attributed to the lemon drop shots!!! LOL)

 



I can share the list.  It's going to have to be later in the week though.  The ceremony was at 3pm.  Our photographer was actually the best man's brother.  He and DH grew up together.  He actually retired from photography but came out of retirement for our wedding for which I'm sooooo grateful! 

 

And thanks for all the compliments and well wishes from everyone!!!!

 



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This is what my pre-travel brochures look like. There are some great examples in this forum and I was able to "steal" many of the ideas. I thought it turned out great for working on it for only a week. Now I need to find an envelop that fits this size!!!

 

P1060554.jpgP1060556.jpg

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Originally Posted by amybermuda View Post

Quote:

 

Meredith, Who are you having your AHR for?  If his parents are coming to Mexico, then the AHR is not for them, right?  Are there guests who are not able to come to Mexico you really want to celebrate with?  Can they come to NO?  I really wanted my 90 year old grandpa to be there -- he was able to make an hour or so in Maryland -- so it was worth it to me.

 

I have to be honest here, while I had a great time at my AHR, it was a bit anti-climatic.  I don't regret having an AHR, I am just saying after my wedding was over I was a little relieved that it was over - and then I had to do the AHR stuff...  The week of, I was really excited, but the weeks leading up to it was more of a chore.

 

My question is the same as Amy's: who's the AHR supposed to be for?  Our wedding was family only so our AHR was for our friends.  A lot of my family decided to come, which was an added bonus, but it really wasn't for them. 

 

Planning the AHR was really stressful but it was fun to get to celebrate with all our friends.  I think having a BBQ at your house is a great idea.  It doesn't have to be announced as an AHR.  You could do something like a wedding photos screening party.  Very casual and the only thing wedding related would be the unveiling of your gorgeous pics!  

 

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Originally Posted by chong View Post

 

This is what my pre-travel brochures look like. There are some great examples in this forum and I was able to "steal" many of the ideas. I thought it turned out great for working on it for only a week. Now I need to find an envelop that fits this size!!!

 

Your brochure looks awesome!!  This was what I originally wanted to do, but could not create a good design to save my life!  Did you do this yourself or have it professionally done?  Really looks great!

 

I ended up doing a passport, so I'll try to take a picture and share tonight.

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Yay...it works again!!  As I was trying to post earlier...  Chong, your brochure looks awesome!!!  I originally wanted to do this same thing, but could not come up with a good design to save my life!!  Did you do this yourself or have it professionally done?  It really looks great!

 

I ended up doing a passport, so I'll try to take a pic and share it with you guys tonight.

 

 

Azul Sensatori May 7, 2011!

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Originally Posted by amybermuda View Post

 

Meredith, Who are you having your AHR for?  If his parents are coming to Mexico, then the AHR is not for them, right?  Are there guests who are not able to come to Mexico you really want to celebrate with?  Can they come to NO?  I really wanted my 90 year old grandpa to be there -- he was able to make an hour or so in Maryland -- so it was worth it to me.

 

I have to be honest here, while I had a great time at my AHR, it was a bit anti-climatic.  I don't regret having an AHR, I am just saying after my wedding was over I was a little relieved that it was over - and then I had to do the AHR stuff...  The week of, I was really excited, but the weeks leading up to it was more of a chore.

I guess the AHR was technically for family who couldn't make it and friends. My grandmother says she's in too much pain to travel and my uncle is not a fan of flying. Other than that, everyone I really wanted to be there will be. I had come to terms with the fact that some just won't be able to share in our day, but in the beginning FI wasn't completely on board with that. I think he has now come to terms with it all and is over it and that's why he's not pushing for it all of a sudden. In addition to the fact that I told him that if he really wanted it, the majority of the planning was going to be up to him. I agree that it was just more stress that I wasn't willing to take on. The stress for our wedding is enough and it's good stress because my heart is invested in it. I can't say the same about the AHR.

 

Thanks for your experience with the situation. I think I would have had the same outlook on it (being anti-climatic and all).
 

Originally Posted by daniepps View Post

Someone asked about the adult side vs. the family side vs. the premium side.  We had guests all over the resort.  As a matter of fact since the resort was sold out most of our guests were upgraded to the premium side ( I wasn't too happy about that because we wanted to be on the premium side alone but that's another story) but anyway. It really doesn't make a bit of a difference where the rooms were.  Everyone pretty much gathered at the adult pool swim up bar everyday no matter where they stayed.  We also had a swim up suite so in the evening we told everyone to just meet at our pool and we did more partying there, not sure if we were supposed to do that but we did and it was all cool!

Thanks for that info!
 

Originally Posted by mzgillis316 View Post


THis is the same thing I am going through, my FI refuses to pay for a AHR bc he feels that if ppl didnt make an effort to try to come to our wedding why should we go through extra measures to accommodate them. I understand his point being as though we currently have 70 ppl booked and only 7 of my family members/friends will be there which annoys me but I cant be too upset b/c I knew that going in. Bottom line we chose a destination wedding bc we could not afford the 400 person wedding I would have had at home, yes we want to include our friends and families but if its going to be stress and more money than we will defeat the purpose. At the end of the day its about you and your new husband. just my thoughts

 

Oh and if you havent already you should check out the reviews on trip advisor for the Banyan Tree I'm really swaying in that direction the idea of a private villa with a private pool is sooo appealing its what I think of when i think Honeymoon LOL

I feel the same way your FI does sometimes. You don't know how many people don't even know how much it would have cost them to come because they just wrote it off without looking into it. I'm kinda glad you put it like that because that makes me not feel so bad. We chose a DW b/c it was going to be too expensive to have the wedding I wanted for 200 ppl PLUS I just didn't want it to be a spectacle. It sucks that only 7 of you family members are going, but I still don't think that's something that you should/would regret. I know I won't. Thanks for the insight!

 

Now, for the fun stuff....I looked @ Banyan Tree last night and fell in love!! I swore off TripAdvisor just because of the misleading stuff they were saying about AS, but I guess I can check it out for this wink.gif. I have to work on getting FI on board with this. We were not planning to take a honeymoon until next year, so if the AHR is off we should be able to go where we really want to go!! I tried to get him on board with Zoetry a couple months ago and he looked at me funny blush2.gif

 

Keep me posted on whether you choose it tho. Maybe if he shoots me down I can live vicariously through you!!
 

Originally Posted by chong View Post

Meredith,

I am sorry to hear about your situation. It sucks to have your FI and MIL change their mind. We are not having AHR because we just can't afford it. We could have a BIG wedding with everyone back in Baltimore but that's just not what we wanted. I do think a small party with people who want to come for Mardi Gras and see you guys all at the same time can work out. You can show all your wedding pictures and just PARTY. It doesn't have to an official AHR.

Hopefully you can make up your mind and don't stress out about this anymore. You have the wedding to plan!!!
 

So true Chong!! Thanks for your input. I think this may be the route we take instead of it being a big production.
 

Originally Posted by chong View Post

This is what my pre-travel brochures look like. There are some great examples in this forum and I was able to "steal" many of the ideas. I thought it turned out great for working on it for only a week. Now I need to find an envelop that fits this size!!!

 

P1060554.jpgP1060556.jpg

Great job Chong! You included info that I wouldn't have thought to include. Did you use a template or what?
 

Quote:
Originally Posted by taylorwd View Post

 

My question is the same as Amy's: who's the AHR supposed to be for?  Our wedding was family only so our AHR was for our friends.  A lot of my family decided to come, which was an added bonus, but it really wasn't for them. 

 

Planning the AHR was really stressful but it was fun to get to celebrate with all our friends.  I think having a BBQ at your house is a great idea.  It doesn't have to be announced as an AHR.  You could do something like a wedding photos screening party.  Very casual and the only thing wedding related would be the unveiling of your gorgeous pics! 

I'm loving the idea of a screening party!! I think we may do this. This way people don't feel obligated to bring gifts and expect things like a garter/bouquet toss. There's actually a place here that's set up like a lounge and has a huge movie room where we could do a slide show or something and just not invite as many people as we had originally wanted to. I may be stealing this idea!!
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Originally Posted by msmarmar123 View Post

 

 

 

We used a lot of the restaurants on the El Dorado side, as well as the gym. We also went over to the theatre for the evening entertainment and the bar. It was a beautiful property. I only remember seeing one pool, but there were tons of cabanas on the beach to use. As well many of the guests seem to be enjoying the use of bikes to travel around the resort (it's very long, runs along the beach). I don't know how the rooms are on the El Dorado side. Sorry I can't be of more help.

 

 

 

 

Originally Posted by daniepps View Post

 

Hello ladies.  I'm back!!!!!  I had a wonderful time and wish I could've/would've stayed longer.  We tried to extend our stay.  The resort was very accomodating but we would've ended up paying $600 each to change our flight which was completely out of the question.  I want to do a review but when I looked under that thread I saw that it was closed so I don't know where to do it.  I was reading back a couple of pages and saw someone asked about the DJ.  We didn't use the DJ.  I used my iPod which worked out perfectly.  I made a playlist and just played it straight through. The WC worked the iPod and we had one of our guests be the MC. It worked out fine and saved a lot of money because all we had to pay was $250 for the amplifiers and speakers.

 

If anyone has any questions about the resort or WCs ask away.  I'll be happy to answer.  And if anyone knows where reviews go please let me know.

Welcome back! Your pictures are beautiful :) And thanks for the info about the ipod...we were thinking about doing the same. I would love to have some music suggestions when you have time.

 

 

 

Originally Posted by dstinationdrmr View Post

 

Ok Ladies, I'm finally caught up since I was gone. It took me 3 days!! Lol.

 

In the past week FI and I have come to the decision that we will probably not have an AHR as we planned. I'm kinda bummed but kinda relieved at the same time. I feel like it was too much for me to plan and the fact that it was going to be Mardi Gras weekend, things were just really pricey. We would have spent the money we saved doing a DW on the AHR. Also, FI spent the week at home vitising his parents and they said that they thought it was too much to have to come to MX in Nov then have to turn around and come to N.O. in March. I kinda understand this, but at the same time I'm a little disappointed in this. FI and I have been living together for 3 years and not once have they been to visit. I think it's because his mom isn't keen on our pre-marital living arrangement but that's just specualtion. We could be living in a matchbox for all they know. I'm ok with not having a huge party. I was always fine with just having our wedding in MX and calling it a day. FI and his mom were the ones pushing to have an AHR because a lot of their family will not be there.

 

Anyway, now I'm torn because we put it in everyone's heads that we were going to do something that weekend. We even paid a deposit on the venue. Now, some people that I wanted to be involved in some way aren't going to be involved at all, i.e. my grandmother and uncle. We still wanted to do something but if his parents and possibly his BM won't be there I think it's a little pointless. So, one of our thoughts is to just do something like a bbq or a random party but not necessarily have that be connected to our wedding. I feel that this would be a fun idea especially since it will be Mardi Gras weekend. Or we can have an AHR for our one year anniversary. Any thoughts? Anyone going thru something similar?

If you had meant it more for your grandmother and uncle... Why not do a special dinner with those guests that mean a lot to you and could not attend down south. It doesn't have to be big or over the top. Make it small and intimate, and enjoy a nice dinner with your grandmother, uncle and perhaps a few others. And I agree with (I think it was Amy), show them the wedding pictures and make them feel included!

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