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dilmemma regarding men's AHR attire


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#1 boscobel

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    Posted 06 March 2008 - 01:40 PM

    Oy vey. Yet another dilemma is arising. To recap - we are getting married in Jamaica in May, and our AHR is in July at a Chinese/Japanese restaurant. It isn't going to be a completely formal affair, but it will be nice. I assumed that the bridal party would be wearing the same clothes that we wear in Jamaica, but now I am doubting that decision. I (OF COURSE!) will wear my dress again, and my BM's can wear their dresses, but I am afraid that the men will be under dressed in linen drawstring pants and a linen shirt. I don't want them to have to buy 2 set of clothes (or rent). Would it look stupid if we just told them to wear a suit, any suit, to the AHR and we would buy them all the same ties? To refresh memories, I will insert pics of the BM dresses and GM Jamaica clothes. Help me please! My FFIL wants to wear a tux, so I am just thinking that the GM and groom CANNOT wear such casual clothes. Ahhhhhhh!
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    #2 LadyP

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      Posted 06 March 2008 - 02:27 PM

      but if that is what they wore. isnt the purpose to recap the wedding for the guest. I would not make the men rent a tux or buy anything else it would not be fair. This is just my opinion. Under dressed depends on how high you set the bar. they were not underdressed at the wedding

      #3 Jenn

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        Posted 06 March 2008 - 02:54 PM

        I think I would have them wear the same thing as they did in Jamaica... can you ask FFIL not to wear a tux? I think your guests will appreciate that everyone is wearing what they did in the pics, and the weather will certainly be great for the light attire.

        #4 jmhein

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          Posted 06 March 2008 - 02:56 PM

          I agree, I dont think the men will be underdressed if they stick to their wedding attire (including your groom!)
          ------------------------------------------------MARRIED at the Riu Ocho Rios - Feb 12, 2008 - Best day of our lives!Honeymooned at Sandals Whitehouse European Village - Feb 16-23


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          #5 Jacqueline

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            Posted 06 March 2008 - 02:57 PM

            Hm thats a tuff one. Maybe have the men alter the outfits alil for the AHR with dressier shoes, and dresy blk shirts, ?? As far as it being another costs to them, who gives a crap. What's another shirt going to cost ya know? Besides all they do is basically SHOW UP and rent/buy the attire. The BM's contribute to the shower, the bach party, the dresses, shoes, etc etc. So tuff titties if it's more $ for them.

            I'm going to start a new "tradition", and that is that the groomsmen should have to help with the shower. Wouldnt that be great? The shower is for BOTH the bride and groom so wtf is the deal with that? I think for mine I am going to have the men help out too. Ok sorry Car, got off topic there.

            Anyway, what does Matt think you should do? Men don't know though I guess so it's basically whatever you decide huh??

            #6 boscobel

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              Posted 06 March 2008 - 03:43 PM

              Yeah, that was my whole problem, I don't want to have them spend more money.
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by LadyP
              but if that is what they wore. isnt the purpose to recap the wedding for the guest. I would not make the men rent a tux or buy anything else it would not be fair. This is just my opinion. Under dressed depends on how high you set the bar. they were not underdressed at the wedding
              I (hope I can) def tell my FFIL not to wear a tux, but I guess I got insecure about the reactions the guests might have seeing the way that my FSIL reacted when her hubbie would be wearing, as she called them, "pajamas". She didn't mean anything by it, cuz she isn't like that, but it is really getting under my skin, and now I am insecure about my choice.
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Jenn
              I think I would have them wear the same thing as they did in Jamaica... can you ask FFIL not to wear a tux? I think your guests will appreciate that everyone is wearing what they did in the pics, and the weather will certainly be great for the light attire.
              I think I will be sticking with my original clothing, but I needed to get some input, so thanks!
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by jmhein
              I agree, I dont think the men will be underdressed if they stick to their wedding attire (including your groom!)
              I def don't want black shirts, cuz I am kinda anti-black as a color. I think at this point, my choices are to stick with what I originally thought (the pics above) or perhaps getting rid of that look entirely and having the men buy a tan suit and wear that to both.

              Oh and Matt said "whatever you want". Sometimes he really has no opinion when I really need him to!
              Quote:
              Originally Posted by Jacqueline
              Hm thats a tuff one. Maybe have the men alter the outfits alil for the AHR with dressier shoes, and dresy blk shirts, ?? As far as it being another costs to them, who gives a crap. What's another shirt going to cost ya know? Besides all they do is basically SHOW UP and rent/buy the attire. The BM's contribute to the shower, the bach party, the dresses, shoes, etc etc. So tuff titties if it's more $ for them.

              Anyway, what does Matt think you should do? Men don't know though I guess so it's basically whatever you decide huh??


              #7 LadyP

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                Posted 06 March 2008 - 04:11 PM

                Quote:
                Originally Posted by carly
                Yeah, that was my whole problem, I don't want to have them spend more money.


                I (hope I can) def tell my FFIL not to wear a tux, but I guess I got insecure about the reactions the guests might have seeing the way that my FSIL reacted when her hubbie would be wearing, as she called them, "pajamas". She didn't mean anything by it, cuz she isn't like that, but it is really getting under my skin, and now I am insecure about my choice.!
                Ok I am not feeling well so dont take this personally. I might read this tomorrow and fee bad but today tell FSIL to suck a d*ck. It is your wedding and if you wanted him to wear a thong that is your business. How dare she tell you how she feels about YOUR wedding. her. do what you want. Do not let anyone make you secondn guess yourself.

                I'm sorry

                Thank God for the smilies.

                #8 boscobel

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                  Posted 06 March 2008 - 04:16 PM

                  I know Catherine! I was pissed when she first said it too. But honestly, she ins't like that. She bugs me about somethings, but I think she spoke before thinking that time.

                  #9 Alyssa

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                    Posted 06 March 2008 - 06:16 PM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by Jenn
                    I think I would have them wear the same thing as they did in Jamaica... can you ask FFIL not to wear a tux? I think your guests will appreciate that everyone is wearing what they did in the pics, and the weather will certainly be great for the light attire.
                    i agree with Jenn - is Matt set on the tux?

                    #10 boscobel

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                      Posted 06 March 2008 - 06:26 PM

                      No, Matt wants to stay casual. It's his dad who wants to wear the tux. I talked to Matt about it and told him it ws his choice - either the more island-y clothes or a tan suit. Cuz I like the idea of the same clothes for both things. He said he didn't want to wear a suit on the beach. I said, cool, that's settled!

                      Thanks for all your input ladies!




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