Jack and Jill/Stag and Doe before a destination wedding?

[Jenn Burch]

My future sister in law has decided she wants to throw a stag and doe for my fi and i. I am a little worried because it sounds like a money grab before asking people to pay so much to come to our wedding. She insists its not and has already started planning it. Im still really on the fence about the whole thing. Whats your opinion?

[Mufin1785]

Hmmm... that is tough one.  No one I know has ever had a stag and doe party, but from what I understand guests purchase tickets to attend and the money helps the couple with cost of wedding or honeymoon.  It does sound like a money grab, if this is something that is acceptable in your region I dont see why you shouldn't have one. 

[Jenn Burch]

Yes guests purchase tickets to get in, then you have prizes and cheap drinks and games. My future SIL keeps telling me all her friends still did it when they did destination weddings and at this point it looks like she wont take no for an answer. Thanks for the help!

[Dazeydawl]

Hey im from manitoba and here we call them socials.... mine is on saturday.. so i say go with it. We werent going to have one either because of the destination wedding... but when we started telling people that they flipped on us. Socials are definately an expected thing here in winnipeg. Not sure if there is much difference between socials and stag and does but ours are usually a pparty for a couple hundred people.

[Jenn Burch]

I like the name socials way better!!! 

 

My FI and I have thought about just going ahead with it and at the end divide the money up evenly amongst the people coming to the wedding to pay for a portion of their trip instead of using it for ourselves.... any thoughts?

[Dazeydawl]

Originally Posted by Jenn Burch 

 

I like the name socials way better!!! 

 

My FI and I have thought about just going ahead with it and at the end divide the money up evenly amongst the people coming to the wedding to pay for a portion of their trip instead of using it for ourselves.... any thoughts?

Thats agreat idea!!!! Then you dont need to feel guilty about taking money from them lol. I would do that as well.. but our resort is non AI so in the end its almost like doing a wedding at home.. i have to pay for reception, open bar. everything!

[Lydia1120]

We're having a Jack and Jill for us and I felt the same way.  So we've decided is to go ahead with it but all the money we make will go into an "Excursion Fund" for the group.  I've inquired about renting the Catamaran exclusively for our group and going swimming with the Dolphins as well as the jeep safari.  I've got the tour company down to $130 pp for 40 people.  However, we have 79 people going so far so it may come out even cheaper.  With the money we make from the Jack and Jill, we hope to bring it down to about $50 pp. 

[csho]

Thats a great idea to either use it to help cover costs of the trip or to use for an excursion! I love it!

[amylouise]

Honestly, the jack and Jill thing horrifies me, it just feels so tacky. I know this might not be a popular opinion, but it is definitely a money grab. What's next, a jack and Jill for a house? It's just awful.

[krisdaversa]

my MOH and bestman want to do one, I am still not 100% towards it but I know they are wanting to do it out of love. We are going to use the money towards our guest