My story is a bit of a long one, so I'll try not to get too carried away with details.
I married my husband Matt in May of 2008 and we knew that we weren't planning on having kids right away. We said we'd "talk about it" in a year. Well, what do you know, but I ended up getting pregnant the weekend we went away for our 1st anniversary in 2009. A few days later, I had some major cramping. Like so bad it made me feel like I was hot and sweaty and might pass out. After it continued for a few hours, I had a co-worker drive me and my mom to the ER (we work on a university/hospital campus). They did an ultrasound and couldn't see anything, but confirmed the pregnancy via blood work. By then, the cramping had stopped. Since they weren't able to locate the sac, they wanted to continue to monitor me, so I went in every other day for blood work to make sure the pregnancy was progressing as it should. Unfortunately, the blood work lied! My blood hormones were doing everything that they should in a normal and healthy pregnancy, but when they gave me another ultrasound, they located the pregnancy in my left fallopian tube. If they had caught it earlier, they could have dissolved it via a methaltrexate shot, but since there was already a heartbeat, I needed emergency surgery and ended up losing my tube. This was super depressing b/c I wasn't all that excited about the pregnancy at first since it was a surprise but had just gotten to the excited part and I thought all was well since my blood work was good and then I heard this. Physical recovery was fine, I was sore for a week or so and had lingering back issues for a few months, but the emotional recovery...I'd say I'm still dealing with that.
As soon as we were medically approved, we began TTC and I started charting on Fertility Friend (FF). Funny enough, once I started charting, it was obvious to me that when I had "accidentally" gotten pregnant previously, it was because I ovulate late in my cycle. I had assumed I was normal and I O'd halfway through. Anyway, since my fertility was decreased by 50% b/c of the loss of my left tube, after a few unsuccessful months, we went to a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE). We were with one office for almost a year and went through various medical and/or IUI cycles before I decided that I just wasn't happy there. We had taken a few month break and were just starting back up with the doctors inn November of 2010. I had an appt at practice #1 on 11/19 and decided I wouldn't be returning there, so went to practice #2 on 11/23 for an initial appt. I found out on 11/26 that I was pregnant for the second time with no medical interventions. It was definitely a surprise. But I got the bad news on 12/06, on my 32nd birthday, that this pregnancy wasn't viable either and was most likely another ectopic but in my right tube. We couldn't locate it on an ultrasound, so knowing my history, my doctor gave me the methaltrexate shot (in my ass cheeks, fun!) to dissolve before a heartbeat was able to be formed and I lose my remaining tube. This was also very depressing b/c we had been trying so hard for so long and then to get that news on my birthday morning, I just felt like we were cursed.
As soon as AF returned, my doctor was very proactive about treatment and I had another surgery in February 2011 to remove polyps, some endo and verify that all was well with my right tube. And we immediately started up IUI cycles and continued through until May. In May, I experienced a very sad and unexpected tragic loss in my family, so we stepped away from TTC b/c my heart just wasn't in it. Then I got my third surprise and unexpected BFP in August. Of course we are super happy and I look at it as a gift from my lost brother. I think this gift was given to us to lessen the pain of losing him. Or to take away the focus of the grief. We watched this pregnancy carefully and didn't announce until we were pretty sure it was safe. In fact, I just made the announcement (besides my bosses) at work today!
We don't plan on finding out the sex at the next ultrasound, we think we will have them put it in an envelope and open it Christmas morning. We were going to wait until the shower, but I decided it was something better shared with close family first. Plus, this is the first set of holidays without my brother, so it's very difficult for my family and I think it might be good to have something positive to focus on Christmas morning rather then the sadness of who is missing.
We are due April 13, 2012 and I have an open mind about my "birth plan". I like to think that I tend to the natural side of things, but I also watched my sister give birth to her youngest a few years ago and I was terrified. I've since some to terms that we are all strong in different ways and just b/c she was natural doesn't mean I am weak if I chose an epidural. I'm very excited to become a mom! But also, super scared.
And I guess I'm not all that great at keeping stories short, am I....