My FI and I were engaged on Christmas 2009. I have always dreamed of a wedding on a tropical beach so we began planning for Punta Cana for February 2011 in order to allow close friends and family time to save up money and join us. In May, my dad was taken to the hospital, had emergency surgery, and diagnosed with cancer. He has since healed from multiple operations, and began 6 months duration of chemotherapy. His chemo began in August and if he stays on track, will finish in January 2011. I kept ahead with the planning in the hopes that all would end well and he would be fit for travel come February. I mailed out the invitations last week and spoke to my mom the other day. They were very upset that I mailed out the invitations without talking to them first. They had apparently spoken to the doctors who informed them that there was absolutely no way my dad would be able to travel. Even if he did finish his chemo in time, his immune systems would still be weakened and he would be very susceptible to infection and the insurance cost would be astronomical. They have made it clear that they will not be able to attend. My mom assumed I would go ahead with the trip just as a vacation and then have a ceremony here when we returned. I can't do this, as it would be a miserable week thinking about what should be happening, especially if there is another wedding taking place that week.
1) Do a legal day here before we leave and just have immediate family in attendance. I'm not a fan of this, I feel it would tarnish the whole idea of our wedding on the beach if the actual ceremony already happened at city hall.
2) Go ahead with the wedding as planned understanding that my parents will likely disown me (even though we have made it clear that we understand not everyone will be able to attend for various reasons)
3) Cancel the destination wedding and have the ceremony the day of our At Home Reception as we already have the venue booked and would just need to add the ceremony. Our AHR date is April 30th and since we live in Ontario, that early in spring would likely still be cold ~ completely the opposite of a tropical wedding.
I'm really not sure which decision would be the best one.