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My mum needs more surgery !!!

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#1 roo66

  • Sr. Member
  • 1,001 posts

    Posted 18 October 2009 - 04:59 PM

    Hi girls im hoping some of you may be able to help with some answers i need.Last week i flew to Dublin to be with my mum who was having surgery to close two holes in her heart.She is 67 and for a good couple of years had been having to take more and more medication to keep things under control she also had her thyroid removed about 30 years ago.A few years ago her gp overdosed her with her thyroxine sending her heart rate up to 120 plus.This may or may not have some bearing on her condition now.We will never know.
    Today i find myself back home because i have had to much time off from work with my own health issues and now wish i was still there with her as she waits to have more surgery.She went to theatre last wednesday two hours later the surgeon comes to us and says it went well BUT he couldnt close the second smaller hole and came out as he was concerned that he would get in a tangle with the first and larger hole coming unstuck.A good call we thought.He went on to say that her heart rate was very low so he shocked her.In hindsight he said he wasnt sure if it would of been better to wait to see if it picked up as he has sent it into arrithmiya(SP).Her heart rate from theatre was mid to high 30s low!!! with it improving the next day to high 40s however having been told shed only be there 48 hours we kinda new she wasnt coming home.Friday she had a bad day with her feeling the lows and the highe which went on two occasions up to 210,120 99 etc resting back in the high 30s.The drs visited and said she needed a pacemaker
    and it will be monday,tommorrow!!.Yesterday after we had left to fly home the dr came again and said its now a defibrilator as her heart rate is very low.Now from what ive read this is more serious than a pacemaker i think.Im so worried as she so far away i wish id stayed with her.Im going to go into work in the morning and see if i can get the week off and fly out tomorrow.My dad is set in his ways and wanted to go home a four our drive from the hospital i am so cross with him right now for his selfish ways as my poor mum is in a hospital far away from home with her family not with her.I dont know when she will be home and in darker moments if she will come home at all.Why did i worry about work when my mum is so sick.SOOOOOOOOO does anyone know anything about heart surgery who can tell me the truth about what to expect.

    #2 IrishgirlinNY

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    • 938 posts

      Posted 18 October 2009 - 05:32 PM

      I will tell you my situation and what my family has been through this year. My mother has been sick on and off for the past 8 years. This past Feb 24 she was rushed down to the ER of the hospital (she is an RN at a local hospital) since she didn't feel well. She was diagnosed with pneumonia on the 24th. Still in the hospital, on the 26th I get a phone call from my dad to come to the hospital now. My fiance and I head to the hospital as well as my sister and brother and his wife. We all get there and head up to the room. As we walk up, her room is packed with drs and nurses and all her co-workers (its the hospital she works in). Her heart had stopped and the were resusitating her. This was the worst I had ever seen her. They got her heart starting again. She was put into CICU. The drs told us they were giving her a pacemaker. We actually questioned if she should also get a defibulator. The drs told us that the pacemaker on its own would "do the job" if her heart were to stop again. She actually was in the hospital for about 3 weeks. She had never felt better in years than she did when she got out of the hospital in March of this year.
      My mothers went into cardiac arrest on August 30 this year and passed away. This is the mose devastating thing in life to go through. We questioned how she died of cardiac arrest with a pacemaker. How is this possible They told us that the hear t can slowly slow down to where the pacemaker doesn't even realize it is stopping.

      If I could go back to Feb 26 I would have them put the defibulator in as well. I have no idea if this would have made any difference, but anything that I could do to change the end result, I would do in a heartbeat.

      As for work vs time with your mother. It's such a hard situation to be in. I look back and only wish that I saw her even more than I did. I live about 20 minutes away from my parents, but always was busy. Usually saw them 2 times a week or so. I actually broke my shoulder 2 weeks before she passed away so it made it even harder to see her since I can't drive.

      I would definitely look at the defibulator as well as pacemaker. I would say even if you can't get there to see her, make sure you talk to her constantly. You can't talk to your parents, or the people you love, enough. I have learned so much from my mom passing away. I speak to my dad everyday and make sure that Paul and I get down to see him at least 3 times a week.

      I really hope everything works out for you and I hope your mothers stay at the hospital is short. I know how hard it is to see her in that bed.

      Good luck with everything

      #3 SusieQ

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      • 1,603 posts

        Posted 18 October 2009 - 06:03 PM

        Both very sad stories, I know having a sick family member is so hard and the weight of having time off work to deal with theses situations can be brutal. I hope everything turns out ok. I lost my mother 26 years ago xmas day, it's never been the same for our family since. You're in my prayers

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