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Disapointed in turnout. Am I alone?


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#21 DanielleNDerek

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    Posted 08 January 2008 - 12:45 PM

    I know it sucks, doesn't it?! We had at least 15 people that were "definately going", decided they weren't or couldn't make a decision when it came down to deposits. I was definately disappointed but realized that should be expected with a DW. It does get frustrating hearing over and over "Wish we could come but...". I can't wait to stop hearing that line.
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    #22 TATrisha

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    Posted 08 January 2008 - 01:22 PM

    I feel this way too and I know Shawn does also. We thought 50 guests would come and maybe even more. Now we are struggling to get 30
    People who said they were coming since the beginning are backing out and planning other trips. It's very disheartening, but just like you, my mom and FI keep telling me that our closest family and friends are there and that's all that truly matters. It just hurts a little.

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    #23 Carrie-Dreams DR

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      Posted 08 January 2008 - 01:37 PM

      When we discussed having a DW, we decided that no matter who comes, we are going there to be married, and to have a great time. Thank god, the people that matter most have booked, and even cashed in RSP's to be there. These are true friends, and the ones that matter. We can't be mad at others, for the choices we made regarding our wedding.

      #24 rodent

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        Posted 08 January 2008 - 02:03 PM

        I think most of us have a similar situation. Over 70 people told me that want to go. I doubt 25% will actually go. I guess what makes it easier for me is that I didn't want a big group. I'm actually a bit relieved when people can't make it. I'd rather have a small group & really get to spend quality time with those people than a huge group. I think less people will make it easier to get together & go on excursions, etc. A big appeal of a DW for me was having a small, close group around me.

        #25 rodent

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          Posted 08 January 2008 - 02:09 PM

          I agree, that an honest no is so much better than a "I hope to make it" when they know they are not likely to go. I planned my wedding in a way so I wouldn't have to worry about how many people come. It has really helped me to just relax & see what happens. His parents & siblings are booking soon. After that, all immediate family are booked. Then it doesn't matter to me who else makes it. I know we'll have a great time with our immediate families.

          #26 CarrieRN

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            Posted 08 January 2008 - 02:35 PM

            This is the hard part of the DW process. I have a lot of people I know are going (at least 16 people) who haven't booked yet. I know it is pretty early for most people to think about my Nov. wedding. And I want to get lots done so that it can be off my list and I can stop stressing out. I'm sure that won't happen for months now. Can't purchase lots of stuff for OOT bags since I don't know how many will be there. A lot of people seem to be choosing a 3night option which might work out better for us. We will have more time to spend with people (and maybe even each other) after we have less people to try and spend time with. It must be something in the air. I have been stressing more the past day or two.
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            #27 JUSTUSTWO

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              Posted 08 January 2008 - 02:51 PM

              THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for all of your responses & support....After how I felt last night, I tell you, I don't know what I would do without you guys & BDW...SNIFFLE, SNIFFLE.

              Its definitely a comfort to know that I am not alone and to know that this isn't an issue that only I am going thru. I mean it sucks that many of us are going thru this but its good to have such a great support group.

              As so many of you have said, this has truly shown me who my friends really are. Its just amazing that you can have a friend who you are the closest in the world to, who backs out, but a friend that you're not as close to says "they wouldn't miss it for the world' and puts their deposit down. I guess this is what I didn't expect. So I now look at all my friends a little differently. Especially those who I know that I've been there for thru thick & thin. The problem is how do I get this to not affect what I do & don't do for them in the future? I don't think I'll ever forget those that backed out & I'll always have that thought in the back of my mind when it comes to supporting them & their future events. FI has already said that he will definitely keep this in mind!!!!

              I really couldn't sleep last night with thinking about what we should have, could have done. Maybe we should have chosen another location, another time frame, etc. But ofcourse, I heard my FI's voice in my head saying that no matter where we chose we prob would have had the same thing happen. We can't focus on making everyone happy, we have to focus on our happiness.

              So here I am, feeling better as I read your responses. It still a bit sad but in the end, I know I'll get thru this and like many of you said I'm starting to feel that less is more & I'll enjoy a smaller turnout anyway.
              Because of everyone who has posted their wonderful pictures of their weddings, I keep picturing me & my FI on our day, smiling the way that so many of them have, knowing that we will have the times of our lives and all of this drama won't even be a thought!!!

              Thanks again for hearing me out and being wonderful women!!!
              Here's to you guys for keeping me sane!!!!

              #28 boscobel

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                Posted 08 January 2008 - 03:38 PM

                Glad to help you out and I totally agree that it is so much easier to know that you are' the only one experiencing a partic problem.

                #29 JUSTUSTWO

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                  Posted 08 January 2008 - 04:24 PM

                  I actually just had a lightbulb moment!!! HOW ABOUT ALL OF YOU COME TO THE WEDDING To hell with everyone else!!! LOL....LMAO!!!

                  As a matter of fact, I think we need to start a traveling BDW support group. This group could travel around to fellow members weddings!! Personally, I think the idea rocks but I don't know how we'd get our FI's & Hubbys to go along with this.

                  #30 TATrisha

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                  Posted 08 January 2008 - 06:28 PM

                  I'd love to come, but I have a prior engagement... MY WEDDING! he he, we are date twins!

                  ~Trisha~

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