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@@veryvalentine I know! If anything it could've been such a positive experience. It's been three months since the falling out and to be honest, i'm very at peace with it. I have little to no patience anymore for anyone that can't just be supportive. I agree with the earlier posts as well...it's so true, no one will be as happy as us. I've understood that, but there's also the other extreme of people who are not supportive at all.

 

Those people don't deserve anyone's time or stress. A wedding is supposed to be one of the best days of your life.

 

Positive vibes only is a perfect mantra. Funny you would say that.. I just posted that on instagram last week haha

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Wow!!! Cause you can't plan both at the same time!! That would be fun. But it's a year after!!! I would have been so upset and offended too. She didn't like you took some of the focus off her I assume.

 

My bridesmaid didn't want to tell me she was pregnant because she didn't want it a focus in Mexico not us. We sensed she was and did find out a couple days before we left. That's when she told me that. I lol and was 'noooo way we can both celebrate together!!'

 

 

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I know! I couldn't believe it. The sad part is, she was my friend since high school - one of my oldest friends. She had actually asked me to be the MOH in her wedding. I've since been replaced of course.. since telling her I can no longer move forward with a friendship with her.

I hate that people let envy get in the way.. I admit.. there have been times where i'm envious too, but I would never let it take over me the way that it does some people.

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I know! I couldn't believe it. The sad part is, she was my friend since high school - one of my oldest friends. She had actually asked me to be the MOH in her wedding. I've since been replaced of course.. since telling her I can no longer move forward with a friendship with her.

I hate that people let envy get in the way.. I admit.. there have been times where i'm envious too, but I would never let it take over me the way that it does some people.

I agree. I say 'man I want a house like that' haha then I move on. Maybe I can fathom it cause I'm not like that. It's a darn shame. Hugs.

 

 

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@ @@calgarybride2015

 

thank so much for the advice.  I'm starting to feel more peace with my decision.  My decision was to put my foot down and not accept a friendship that is giving me less than I deserve.  I'm over that.

 

I'm taking a Brene Brown workshop to do some work on myself and the lesson last night was that I can practice gratitude when I feel this disappointment.  So one friend totally bailed on me and tried to turn herself into the victim.  She really fell short of being a friend.  But now I'm shiftubg the focus off of her and focusing on those who have been nothing but great and supportive. 

 

#ProjectGratitude 

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@@veryvalentine Good for you!!! That's really amazing. I've been trying to better myself in a similar way. I used to get so upset over this kind of thing, but as i've gotten older i've just started to realize that it isn't the end of the world and I need to find a way to make positive out of the negative. It's sometimes hard for me because I find myself to be an extremely nostalgic person.. so letting go of the past can be hard for me.

 

I love how you had also mentioned focusing on others that have booked with you. I totally agree with that logic as well. Chester and I have been blessed enough to have some very amazing people in our lives and i'd much rather focus on those people :)

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Exactly.   I think it's going to keep us healthier, more positive and create a more positive vibe if we realize that there is so much good too. I'm really going to give this a try.  I know things are gonna suck a long the way, but I'm going to try to back it up with a  positive.  Either that or a shot of tequila.  ha ha. 

 

Last night I actually worked on a DIY project that I will share later on today expressing gratitude to our guests.  :)

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I agree. I say 'man I want a house like that' haha then I move on. Maybe I can fathom it cause I'm not like that. It's a darn shame. Hugs.

 

 

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@calgarybride

 

Haha! exactly.. I think it's really immature for a person to be jealous enough to make something negative out of the situation. I think there are so many forms of envy and when I feel envy for someone that I love or care about.. it's always (like you had said) more of a "wow! That's amazing..i'm totally jealous and i'm so happy for you!!" haha .. not.. wow.. that's amazing (but i'm lying and i'm going to go talk about you behind your back now)

@@veryvalentine Cool! Can't wait to see it :)

 

I'm pretty certain there are going to be more complications along the way.. but I love your idea of the tequila shot haha. Pre-gaming for the wedding as a way to let the negativity slide.. i'm in for that!

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@@veryvalentine Yea.. she tried to cover it up by saying she didn't mean it in a negative way, but it was so clearly negative that I couldn't believe her. Finally after a few days she admitted that she felt that I was going to be too focused on my own wedding and that I won't be able to help her with hers. First of all, her wedding is almost a year after mine... November 2016.. and secondly, I was completely appauled at that selfish excuse for bad talking my wedding.

 

It was so unrepairable after all of that.. I was beyond disgusted.

That's such an awful excuse. It seems to me like the selfish one was her in this case, her wedding planning won't even really get rolling until after your wedding is done. Sounds like envy/jealousy to me, and no one needs any of that.

 

 

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@@TinkerSofi I know! I said the same thing to my FI. The excuse didn't even seem like a fair excuse..especially with how much support I had offered her when she got engaged and asked me to be her MOH. I told her I was there for anything she needed.. and she hadn't even started planning anything yet since her wedding was 2 years away at the time. I have a feeling it has to do with Chester and I getting engaged a few months after them, but having our wedding earlier. Not something that would bother me personally, but I guess it bothered her enough to react that way. I have some amazing girlfriends and i've just accepted that she is not one of them and that there's no point in including someone like that in our big day.

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You know our engagement has been so long! 2 years and counting because of some things that didn't go as planned we had to wait a whole other year. We also have a few friends who got engaged after us and got or are getting married before. I might make a joke to Juan but not that I go around criticizing them haha.

Have I been a bit jealous at times? I have to admit, sometimes, but not the envy kind of jealous. I think that Juan and have been ready to take the next step for a while and I couldn't help but to wonder how nice that would be, but not because I was angry at my friends for getting married before and I certainly didn't hold that against them. On the contrary I was happy for them, it's not a race. So I guess my feelings were more about Juan and I rather than about my friends getting married before haha, if that makes any sense. Therefore I still think it's not an excuse for your friend to act that way, she could have been a bit jealous but a good friend would never let that get in the way of feeling happy for the other person and being there for her.

 

 

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