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A10CalGal

So pissed at DH!!

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GRRRRR. I am livid right now...I had kind of started to get over it & then he just called & refused to acknowledge my pissed-offed-ness. Heres the deal:

 

I take Richard to school every morning. Literally, this is why I get up at 6:30 in the morning, so I can take him to school. I really don't mind overall since I don't have a job to be at (for a few more weeks), but he's obviously going to need to figure something else out. Anyway, I've had a rough few nights of sleep, and had a really hard time getting up this morning...but I did. Richard isn't up. It's 7:00 & we should be leaving in the next 5 minutes. I'm knocking on his door, telling him he's late, get up, come on, lets go...nothing. I make my coffee, and try again (I hate having to hassle him to get up!). Nothing. Third time I go in & turn on his light & point it at his face "GET UP! YOU ARE LATE FOR SCHOOL!" He rolls over & says "my dad said i could stay home today"

 

WHAT?? Are you kidding me? So, of course I call Rafael & ask him what's going on. "Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you." WHat? So, let me get this straight...I'm exhausted, yet dragged my ass out of bed so I could take Richard to school, and hassled him to get up for like 15 minutes & now I find out that his dad, my husband, told him he doesn't have to go to school today & failed to inform ME, the one who provides the transportationhuh.gif FUCK! I was pissed obviously. All DH could say is "I forgot to tell you, I'm sorry." Whatever, I hung up & went to work out.

 

So, now it's like 4 hours later & DH calls to say "hi" from work and totally doesn't acknowledge what happened earlier. He's just chit chatting. I hate it when he does that. So, me being me, I finally just say "honey, can you please acknowledge that I am pissed off about this morning. I feel like I'm being taken for granted & I feel like you have complete disrespect for my time." Well, of course he thinks I'm being rediculous, which obviously I disagree with. He says "how can you be pissed at me, I forgot to tell you, that's all" huh.gif?

 

So I asked him when this whole not going to school decision got made. He said last night before he came to bed. So I asked why he didn't just tell me when he came to bed? "I was going to tell you in the morning" - bull shit. That doesn't make any sense.

 

OK, so I'm probably blowing this out of proportion to some extent. But, really, I am going out of my way to take his son to school, and I expect to be kept in the loop on this situation! Not to mention that there is a bus that could pick his spoiled ass up about a block away - but he's too good to ride the fricking bus. I told Rafael that if he couldn't understand why I'm pissed, and show some respect for my time, then "y'all can figure out how to get his ass to school" That's when he said he'd talk to me later.

 

It's totally the principle for me. Am I over reacting?

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I think you might be over reacting.. sorry but he forgot.. he probably didn't think you'd still be mad hours later. Is there something else bugging you? Stress about your new job?

 

Would you be this upset with a friend?

 

It sucks that you had to get up early and yeah, the boy should be getting himself up, but I think his apology was all that was needed.. that and maybe a back rub tonight! :)

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Thanks for bringing me down & being honest with me Angela!!

 

I guess I'm bothered by Richard in general right now...he's being a complete premadonna 16 year old lately. Every 5 days he starts talking about moving home with his mom because he wants to drive. Yeah, she'll let him drive without a license, we won't. Yet, he won't put the effort in to do what he needs to do to get his license. He failed the CA permit test twice before we came to Seattle. I spent $300 non-refundable on driving school for him, which you have to do in CA. He never took the classes because he never passed the permit test. Yet, he's pissed off at us because we won't let him drive. See how this works? Around in circles. And I'm his chaufer...so yeah, I guess that's what is really bothering me.

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Ok, no offense, but his behind needs to be on that bus! (I can't believe he could be riding the school bus, but has you as a chauffeur instead.) I think he's old enough to "suffer" for the cause! LOL!!

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ok my question is why didn't he go to school. I know that he is R's son but he needs to tell you also, not just ask dad, you're his new step-mom too and have some authority. R. should have talked to you, especially if you're his transportation.

 

Sorry if my response bothers some of you girls but Christa I'm totally on your side with this situation.

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Quote:
Originally Posted by IrieBride08 View Post
Ok, no offense, but his behind needs to be on that bus! (I can't believe he could be riding the school bus, but has you as a chauffeur instead.) I think he's old enough to "suffer" for the cause! LOL!!
Thank you!! Totally! When he realized this would be coming to an end because I'm getting a job, he announced at the dinner table "I don't want to wait to get my license and I don't want to ride the bus"

I think this episode today just blew me up mentally because I think he should be taking the bus anyway, and I don't know how I got myself in this position where I'm his driver, and being taken for granted in my opinion.

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Originally Posted by DreaW View Post
ok my question is why didn't he go to school. I know that he is R's son but he needs to tell you also, not just ask dad, you're his new step-mom too and have some authority. R. should have talked to you, especially if you're his transportation.

Sorry if my response bothers some of you girls but Christa I'm totally on your side with this situation.
I have to agree with you! I would have been pissed too!

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Originally Posted by DreaW View Post
ok my question is why didn't he go to school. I know that he is R's son but he needs to tell you also, not just ask dad, you're his new step-mom too and have some authority. R. should have talked to you, especially if you're his transportation.

Sorry if my response bothers some of you girls but Christa I'm totally on your side with this situation.
Thanks Drea! That's the thing, Rafael easily could have told me this last night after he & Richard talked...it's not like I was sleeping. And, I don't really know why he didn't go. I'm thinking Rafael caved in because he feels guilty about all the shit that's been going on with Richard lately (guilt about his mom, missing his mom & brother, etc) & he did really good last night at a football game. Like it's some twisted reward for playing well. Bottom line, I just don't appreciate being left out of the loop & being hung out like that.

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I think that making him ride the bus and be responsible for his own transportation needs will help him develop character and become more mature. He really will have no reason to if everything is done for him on his terms.

 

Is this something you can discuss with DH? I mean, 16 is practically a grown man! (Why doesn't he ride the bus? Is it safe?)

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Originally Posted by A10CALGAL View Post
Thanks Drea! That's the thing, Rafael easily could have told me this last night after he & Richard talked...it's not like I was sleeping. And, I don't really know why he didn't go. I'm thinking Rafael caved in because he feels guilty about all the shit that's been going on with Richard lately (guilt about his mom, missing his mom & brother, etc) & he did really good last night at a football game. Like it's some twisted reward for playing well. Bottom line, I just don't appreciate being left out of the loop & being hung out like that.
I'm sorry but how is that a reward....take him out to dinner? Sorry the teacher side of me is coming out :)
I think you need to have a small casual meeting with both men in the house and talk to them about it.

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