This really shouldn't bother me, but it does...

[AnneW]

Quote:

Originally Posted by michelle08 I have to agree that this was her choice that she made because she thought it was best for her. It may not be the choice you would have made and maybe it was selfish of her or maybe not but only she will really know that. You have to try and find a way to just let it go and move on...it's hard to see those you love make choices that from the outside seem so wrong or misguided but you really can't support her and judge her decision at the same time so you kinda have to pick which you would rather do...judge or support. BUT just to throw my two sense in on getting back with the boyfriend...the first thing that came to my mind is she had an abortion because she thought it was the only way he would get back together with her (being that it said he didn't want kids and all). That may not be the real reason why...but it just popped in my head. Again though...it all goes back to judging or supporting...sometimes you can't help but judge but you have to decide which direction is most important to you! Good luck.

I agree! Regardless of why she had the abortion, abortion is not an easy decision. Everyone thinks it is, but for many women and girls it is a very difficult decision & one they have to live with for the rest of their lives. Adoption is as well - imagine carrying a child for 9 months and then having to say goodbye to it, it may feel like that child has "died".

Ultimately, this was a choice only SHE could make. Imagine if this child had come into the world, she would have been a mother of a 5 year old and an infant, and the father would most likely have been MIA. What kind of life would that have been for her and those children.

I'm hoping that she will learn from these experiences & hopefully a family member will have the talk about birth control!

[FutureMrsLewis]

Thanks guys. I guess the reason why it's been getting to me is that she was like a little sister to me when we were growing up, especially because we were both so close in age and we spent a lot of time together and even went to the same school. It's not that I really disagree with her decision and hate her for doing it, I just think she's an idiot. If birth control didn't exist or was taboo as it was many years ago, I could see it happening for a second time, but she already had one child (who is a MAJOR cutie I might add) so it's not like she doesn't understand how it's done lol But with that said, I don't hate her for anything she's ever done, and I never will, I was just frustrated that she got herself into that situation and needed to vent that frustration. I couldn't vent to anyone in my family, because they'd burn her at the stake if they could, and FI just replies with "She's an idiot, stop talking about it." So I just really wanted to get it off my chest...

 

Thanks for listening

[michelle08]

"She's an idiot, stop talking about it." So I just really wanted to get it off my chest...

 

Typical guy...one sentence problem solved!

 

I hear ya loud and clear...; You are just frustrated with her poor choices prior to getting pregnant...not her choice of how to handle it...makes sense...

 

Maybe you could have a chat with her being that you are so close and see if you can influence her to be more careful in the future??

[Hartyt509]

How about inviting her over - giving her slap for being an idiot and going back to him but then hug and tell her you love her lol

 

My m8s did that to me when I got married last time lol

[FutureMrsLewis]

lol That's what would happen if I actually talked with her about it, I'd be like "Dammit! Why are you so stupid sometimes!!" lol I think I'm just going to add this to my list of "Why people are idiots", because no matter what anyone says to this girl, if I was to tell her to at least use protection and watch out for herself, she'd throw everything she knows about protection out the window just for spite lol