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Bridal Shower Question

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Originally Posted by Pisces View Post
I would feel really awkward declining a shower invitation, but I would also feel it kind of tacky to invite me to a shower and not the wedding.

So, I vote for a small intimate shower, OR your mom host a pre-wedding party and not call it a shower, so people don't have the impression that they need to bring gifts.

I think I will end up having an intimate dinner/shower for the important women in my life who can't come to the wedding (and those who are) but not call it a shower.

The way I see it, people who want to get you a gift will get you one, shower or not.
I agree. Just don't call it a shower. As long as it's not an event where people feel required to bring a gift, I think it's fine to invite whoever.

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It depends if you want to go by the "etiquette book" or not. If so, then only invite people who were invited to your shower. If not, then don't call it a shower and maybe make it an AHR.

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I have been to a shower for a DW where everyone was invited (including people not invited to the wedding). As far as I know no-one cared. I didnt care! I mean, from the guests point of view- there are a number of people I whose wedding I would attend if it where at home, but not go to a DW. From your point of view- I am sure you would like to celebrate this with all the people your mom wants to invite, but realistically cant invite all to a DW.


In a perfect world, all those close to you would understand, but I understand your concern and am struggling with the same issue! Good luck!

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Thanks so much for all of the helpful advise!! We only invited a total of 50 people to our DW, we wanted it to only be close family and only 4 friends.


Even though 75-100 women seem like alot my mom is really in no situation to be able to host an AHR for us (which would be at least 200 w/ guys), or else she would have. But both of our families are really big and there just happens to be alot of women that my mom feels should be invited (aunts, cousins, fam. friends). Some of them have already started asking her when the shower would be....which is why we are having such a problem.


I really don't want to offend anyone by inviting them or by not inviting them, so I guess it is hard to tell how people would take it.


I'll let you know what we decide, since the invitations have to go out this weekend.

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