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Can I ask for a back-up bridesmaid?

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Maybe just ask her anyways since she is a good friend. Explain to your FI it's not about numbers, it's about having those that love and support you two as a couple to be at your sides.


Why does he want it even? For picture purposes? Maybe show him pics of uneven bridal parties. I bet you could find a ton on here.

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Originally Posted by Lizz View Post
I think you should either ask her to be a BM (not as a back-up) or not ask her at all. There is nothing wrong with having uneven # of BM and GM, so you shouldn't worry about that.
couldnt have said this better myself. dont ask her to be a backup.

i have a situation where i'm trying to stick to a traditional mex. catholic wedding, which means no GM. and the # of BMs can vary depending on how many gifts you have (arras, lasso, ramo, anillos, etc). the people who do the readings need to be catholic. one of my closest gfs from college is catholic, and i didnt ask her to be a BM right away like i did with my sister and my FI's sister because i was trying to decide whether it would be better to have her as one of the BMs carrying the gifts or if she should do a reading because FI has a limited number of catholic friends and we arent sure they will be able to attend. i finally decided i shouldnt wait to ask her anymore and i explained that i need her involved in my day because shes important to me. and because shes catholic, i was debating over how to utilize her best during the ceremony in case FI's friends back out of the reading, we'd need her. she was so honored she didnt care that i waited a little while to ask because of how i was trying to decide what to do. ultimately, she was just happy that i consider her one of my "must have" friends on my wedding day -- but this was different because shes not a backup.

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