jemmccar

So my fiance and I are very "quiet" people.. we don't like being the center of attention or having people make a big fuss over us. We decided to get married in Negril, Jamaica this summer. It is just going to be us, our parents, and grandparents (we both come from very small families). We are not having attendants or colors- truly no frills. And this is exactly how we want it to be. We did not send out formal invitations, because we know that some family and friends are having money troubles. Anyone can come, but we don't want anyone to feel bad that they can't. Since we did not send out formal invitations and are saving money by not having a traditional wedding, we did not register for gifts. We have notified friends and family of our plans, and said that anyone can come if they would like, but that we will be having an at-home cookout/reception after the wedding also. Most have been happy with that, but still give us grief about how disappointed they are that they can't come to the wedding. Some friends and family have made hurtful comments. "Why do you have to run off and get married in another country?" "Why aren't you having attendants?" "Why can't you just have a "normal" wedding here?" "Why don't you want anyone else at your wedding?" Since we aren't having a "normal" wedding and definitely aren't expecting gifts, we also not doing many of the normal wedding events- like engagement parties, rehearsal dinners, showers, etc. THAT has hurt/offended people also. I didn't realize people would be so hurt or offended. We just wanted to be married on a beach- that's all. And we planned it with good intentions.. not wanting anyone to feel obligated, not putting anyone in an uncomfortable position. We have tried to be as low-key and under the radar as possible... is that wrong? I've found it very difficult to make people feel welcome and loved while also not making them feel obligated/guilty/otherwise negative. Perhaps I went about it the wrong way? For the sake of not offending anyone, should I send out formal invitations, even though the wedding is in July? I REALLY wouldn't expect anyone else to go, but maybe receiving a formal invitation would make them feel better? Argh... you really shouldn't try to please everyone, because it ends up feeling like you didn't please anyone. Just wanted to vent/share my thoughts. If anyone has had a similar situation or has advice for how to handle these things, please share!

Thanks for the responses, ladies! I forgot to mention in my original posting that my wedding is VERY small. Just the immediate family- parents, grandparents, and 2 best friends. So there will be less than 10 guests total, no children. I'm sure a big deterrent to a Couples wedding for many people is the no-children policy. I'm still checking into the details and "fine print" before deciding for sure. Thanks for the input!!

Hiiii there. I have heard great things about many of the resorts in Jamaica. Why did YOU chose the place you did?... Was it the appeal of 7 mile beach? The Martha Stewart weddings of Sandals resorts? The child-friendly resort? Price? location? Activities? Service? Other? Reason I ask.... I fell in love with Negril after seeing many sunset photos on seven mile beach. We're leaning toward Couples Negril... simply because the resort looks very nice, the price is cheaper than a few other all-inclusives, and their basic wedding package fits our needs well. Before we book, I would like to hear some other input on Jamaican destination weddings... What was your thinking/reasoning that lead to choosing your resort over another? Looking forward to your responses!

Hi everyone! My name is Jessica, and I am new to the DW board. I've been engaged since late August, but we have just recently decided on Negril, Jamaica for our wedding site. Right now, Couples Negril is our top choice, and we are planning for a July 14th, 2010 wedding (the 3rd anniversary of when we first met, and also my grandfathers birthday). We are taking the next week or two to research and make absolutely sure this is where we would like to be married before making the down payment. Congrats to all the other newly-engaged/newly-wedded ladies out there! Looking forward to sharing info/tips/pics/advice!