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Pjay Planning Thread - December 15, 2015 Beach Palace

2015 Brides Planning Tips Cancun Riviera Maya

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#751 Wafflesmom

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Posted 14 August 2015 - 06:29 AM

@perianjay I was shocked at how much effort he put into it. He was researching tons of ring designs and collaborated with the jeweller to make sure his vision could be done.

I haven't thought about engraving it but I do like that idea. Your inscription is beautiful, Chester will be so touched and surprised.
My planning thread: http://www.bestdesti...anuary-23-2016/

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#752 pjay

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Posted 14 August 2015 - 07:16 AM

@acw271011 I don't know how I skimmed by your comment yesterday, but i'm seeing it now. I do all of my printing through Vistaprint and I find that the colours are always exact to what I see on my screen. I know that they definitely have a size that would work for the door cards because i've seen quite a number of brides print theirs through vistaprint. 

 

Did you get your tungsten ring anywhere that they offer the free sizing change? I ordered Chester's from a company that allows us a free change in size if he ever needs it.. I think we just have to pay the shipping, but that's it.

 

I'm also really excited for tonight! yay!

 

@vancouverpetunia Thanks so much!! :D


 

My planning thread :
http://www.bestdesti...e/#entry1885631

 



 


#753 yycbride2016

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 09:58 AM

The itinerary cards look so adorable! I love them. And Chester's ring is seriously so cool! It's very unique. I haven't seen anything like that. I like that both your rings will have a similar look to each other with the rose gold! I also think that it will be so awesome to engrave it for him. I love what you will put in it! So cute! I'm sure he will cherish it forever! 


Edited by yycbride2016, 17 August 2015 - 09:58 AM.

~*~YYCBRIDE2016~*~

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#754 pjay

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 10:02 AM

@yycbride2016 aww thank you!! I know.. I love how unique his ring is and that it matches mine as well.. I was so excited about that actually! I can't wait for him to read the engraving.. I know it's going to make him smile.


 

My planning thread :
http://www.bestdesti...e/#entry1885631

 



 


#755 acw271011

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 02:31 PM

@perianjay sadly we didn't get Doug's ring anywhere they offer the free change. I wish I had known something about it 4 years ago - I definitely would have taken advantage of it. We dealt with a reputable jeweller when we bought it but they didn't have anything like that available. I got him a new ring, this time in gold, so if anything happens I can fix it. He's on this new exercise thing now with the idea of losing more weight so the sizing on the new ring just may come in handy!!

 

 I love what you had put into Chester's ring. That's so sweet. It's funny - engraving never even crossed my mind!


I said "yes" again to the love of my life at Grand Coral Beach Club, Playa del Carmen, Mexico on our 4th anniversary - October 20, 2015

 

 

http://www.bestdestinationwedding.com/topic/78874-acw271011-so-this-is-not-a-planning-thread-but/

 

 

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#756 pjay

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Posted 19 August 2015 - 07:45 AM

Ok so I will start this by saying.. I'm sure that my emotions are a tad bit heightened being that i'm getting closer to the wedding and things are starting to stress me out.. add on top of that as well that we have also had lots of wedding party drama and I feel like it should be easier than this!

 

I have two bridesmaids and one maid of honour. I'm not sure if I updated you ladies on my MOH, but she apologized to me about everything and admitted that it was wrong of her. Regardless, I've already moved my wedding date and i've decided to just bury the hatchet because it's not worth it at this point and I really don't want to lose our friendship over any of this.

 

My other bridesmaid is living in New Zealand right now and has been there for a few years. She's a traveler and a free spirit and I have always supported what she is doing. She has been a great friend to me even halfway around the world.. we message everyday and overall we just have a very close bond and friendship. We can talk about anything and we have gotten each other through some of our hardest times even when there's so much distance between us. I've known her since we were ten and that friendship will always be so valuable to me. She is coming to the wedding and i'm so excited to have her by my side on our big day. She has also asked me so many times what she can do to help with the wedding. At this point all i've really needed from her is her emotional support. The physical distance stands in the way of some aspects of the wedding, but I understand this and I don't expect much. Her support has been everything that I need.

 

Lastly I have one more bridesmaid and this is where i'm getting a bit upset I guess..

Since the wedding planning she has done nothing.. literally nothing. She hasn't reached out to ask me if she could help with anything.. she hasn't offered any support at all. She has surprised me so much. I've been avoiding the situation and my feelings involved because i've had so many other things going on and really, I don't need very much support in terms of planning. She has always been back and forth from here and the states. She used to goto school in the states and back in November she moved home due to a bad breakup with the guy she had been seeing for many years. I was the first person to come see her and console her that night. Ever since her becoming single, I've felt like she started living her life a lot different.. almost like a phase. She started going out all the time, going on lots of dates and just having fun. She was also spending a lot more time with one of our friends who is single (and a big partier). I made quite a few attempts over the summer to make plans with her, but it seemed that our schedules never really worked. She also missed my birthday that Chester had graciously put out the money for her ticket and she never paid him back. 

Then in July she had gotten a call for an interview to be a professor at a University in the states. I was so happy for her because this is her dream job and she's worked so hard for it. We chatted about how this would affect the wedding and she said that it wouldn't be an issue, she can have someone proctor her exams since it's over exam week.

It's been a few weeks since she has moved and i've made attempts to chat with her.. she hasn't been the most receptive or chatty. Then a few days ago she messaged me out of the blue asking for the dates of the wedding (So.. you're a bridesmaid and you don't even know the dates?).

I reiterated the dates for her and then she told me she doesn't know if she can make it due to exams. I told her that she had mentioned before that it should be fine and she can have someone proctor her exams for her. She said she will have to see.

 

That was basically the end of our convo.

 

I guess i'm feeling a flood of emotions right now.. not only because of the uncertainty of her making it, but in general I feel like she hasn't been making much of an effort to not only be a bridesmaid, but be a friend.

 

I wish all of this wedding drama would go away :( I have never had so many issues until now.


 

My planning thread :
http://www.bestdesti...e/#entry1885631

 



 


#757 veryvalentine

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Posted 19 August 2015 - 08:35 AM

Ummmmm, how annoying.  

 

Just from sitting down with you and chatting for an hour or two I could already see how much of a low maintenance bride you are.  You have basically planned every detail and you explained your expectations about you just wanting the emotional support. ...they are your wedding cheerleaders.  

 

I think it is such a disappointment that she even asked for the wedding date.  From  reading your post it sounds like she went from newly single party animal, to moving away to take a new, big job, and maybe she's just a little lost right now with all the changes.  Did she forget about how she came up with the solution to her problem about exams over December?

 

How soon can she confirm if she can attend?  I'm so sorry that you are experiencing this.  You've already purchased the BM dresses and all the details surrounding that role.  It's really strange that she just dropped out like that.

 

My experience with these disappointments is that it's probably best not to fully react with her yet.  Just maybe make sure she knows you need to know asap whether her exam solution is a go or not.  If she drops out, it's so disappointing and the way she handled is not cool, but before we even get there maybe wait to see if she realizes that she handled this wrong.

 

It sounds like you guys are in different worlds but hopefully with time she will come around and see that she was a little insensitive.  


ps:  I seems like the 3-4 months to the wedding mark was the sweet spot for all the crazies, disappointments and stress from so many stories I've heard.  I know for me, the 3 month mark was when our officiant, one of my BFFs for 22 years backed out of the wedding.  Our friendship is now basically over.  I think she regrets her decision but I really felt the heartbreak and disappointment from her careless decision to not attend and only give us 3 months to figure out the ceremony officiant.



 
 
Married on June 20th, 2015 at the Grand Sunset Princess Riviera Gazebo & Reception at the Chill Out with 60 guests
 
 

My planning thread:  http://www.bestdesti...unset-princess/

My review thread:  http://www.bestdesti...incess-wedding/


#758 pjay

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Posted 19 August 2015 - 09:27 AM

@veryvalentine I know.. I'm trying to calm myself down about it and just see how it plays out. If she backs out I don't even know what i'm going to do, but i'm preparing myself for the worst right now because it's obvious that I shouldn't have high expectations at this point since she hasn't really been there for me at all lately.

I'm actually so upset at how much drama this wedding has caused. I wish that she could try to understand it from my perspective as well. I feel like she's been so distant from me over the last while because she was always out living her single life and I really didn't have much in common with her at that point. I am done with the clubbing days and looking for guys etc. 

It just really bothers me how selfish she is being. Despite the fact that our lives are in different places right now, she should be more supportive of me and everything happening in my life right now.

 

I honestly think that if she doesn't make it, i'm not really going to try to salvage that friendship anymore. It's been far too one sided in the last year and frankly, I don't feel like friendships should be this one sided. I feel like i've been cutting people out left right and centre, but it's just this realization that if you aren't going to be there for me at all, you don't deserve what I put into this friendship. I've made some great friends in the last couple of years and I almost wish that I had chose a few of them to be in my bridal party. I have one friend who has been so supportive and has even stepped up and started helping my MOH with all of the planning and she isn't even in my bridal party. 


Edited by perianjay, 19 August 2015 - 09:28 AM.

 

My planning thread :
http://www.bestdesti...e/#entry1885631

 



 


#759 veryvalentine

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Posted 19 August 2015 - 10:57 AM

Agreed!  Just wait and see how it all falls into place.  I would set some sort of time limit though- because you can't just wait around to see if she's gonna make it work or not.  In the mean time, maybe you can start thinking about possibly asking your friend that has been stepping up and helping you out to be part of the bridal party.  Works out nice too because the BM dress is one size fits all! ;)

 

 

It really sucks that weddings bring a lot of disappointments.   It was the one thing that really surprised me.  I was stunned by it. We came up with a mantra as we got closer to the 2 month mark because we just didn't want to deal with any more upsets.  Our mantra was, "our day, their problem"  anything that happened, our day, their problem.

 

I really hope your friend comes around and realizes that she handled it wrong.  Now that I've been a bride and gone through the process, I have myself realized that I was not the most sensitive person or greatest wedding guest when it came to weddings in the past.  Especially when I was going through my own party time phase in life...so I tried to be patient with my friends and BMs who just haven't experienced this stuff before- having said that, there is a limit to my patience and I'm sure yours as well!  

 

Take it easy, watch a movie, try to disconnect from this for a bit.  The worst thing I did was start to collect all my disappointments and I started thinking about them more than the good things.  So think about your amazing friends and family that are going to be there for you and Chester and try have the good rise above it all.

 

:) 



 
 
Married on June 20th, 2015 at the Grand Sunset Princess Riviera Gazebo & Reception at the Chill Out with 60 guests
 
 

My planning thread:  http://www.bestdesti...unset-princess/

My review thread:  http://www.bestdesti...incess-wedding/


#760 pjay

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Posted 19 August 2015 - 11:02 AM

@veryvalentine Thanks girl. You always have the most level headed advice and I love that.. I need that!

Sometimes it's so hard for me not to think and act upon my emotions and especially in a time like this when I feel like there's all this pressure on me. I definitely think i've tried to be very forgiving with her involvement, but it's been a bit embarrassing because my MOH keeps saying that every time she reaches out to her for help with the Bachelorette, she's basically useless/doesn't bother. I hate that.. it's so embarrassing to me.

 

Definitely going to try to take it easy tonight and relax when I get home. I'm getting over a nasty cold right now (Who get's a cold in August?!).. so it will be nice to try to de-stress and distance myself from the drama.


 

My planning thread :
http://www.bestdesti...e/#entry1885631

 



 






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