Congrats on the engagement! I also didn't have to convince my FI of a DW, but he had to convince me! hahah. I knew for years that he wanted a DW but I also wanted the big flair of a traditional wedding and up until that point the only DW weddings I had seen were really really small and with a dinner at a restaurant as a reception. I definitely did not want that! I also felt really guilty about making people pay that much to come to our wedding and was worried no one would come.
As I started doing research I found that there are many options, you can stick to the small wedding without a private reception, but there are many hotels that let you experience that "traditional wedding" with the amazing backdrop of somewhere tropical. The costs seem a bit cheaper, although by the time you factor in the travel and transporting decorations there, etc. you could have a wedding locally for about the same price, although maybe not as fancy. What really makes DW cheaper is that you have less guests. I guess it also depends on which hotel you choose, some are more affordable than others. What you said is true, you are spending all that money, but you get to spend a week with your guests having a blast!
As for the guest, most of our friends surprised me, most of the people we invited are actually coming! Which is great! When we got engaged I started to run the idea by our friends, and most of them said they would totally come, and they stuck to that!
My fiance didn't want to get married in Canada because he thinks it's depressing that you plan for everything to be outside and that day is like 10 degrees and your plans get ruined. It's true, weather seems to be much more unpredictable here than over there. Technically it could rain there too, but let's hope for the best haha.
In the end, I kind of caved in because I knew it was important to him and he wouldn't budge on the topic, whereas I was more flexible and I was happy with a DW as well as a local one. He always wanted to get married by the ocean and I love the ocean too, so it's not like I didn't like the idea, I just had my reservations. The planning is way easier in some regards. I think I would go insane if I had to plan a local wedding! The hardest part is being so far away and not being able to see things and speak with people personally but you kind of get used to that. I'd say if you're a control freak, it might not be a great idea, but if you're willing to put details of the wedding in the hands of people who do this for a living, then it's a lot less stressful.
I don't know if that helps at all. Maybe ask him about what is keeping him from accepting the idea of a DW? My fears were sort of irrational and easily addressed. The biggest selling point for me was the fact that for the same money we're having a much nicer wedding over there. I did struggle a lot with the guilt for a while, but that has passed now. Most of our guests are booked and now I'm stoked to spend a week with everyone! Maybe his concerns can be easily addressed and he'll be more likely to accept the idea
Edited by TinkerSofi, 20 January 2015 - 10:12 AM.