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Mother And Father Of The Groom Not Attending?!?!


JennyZ
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Wow. Wow. Wow. There are so many things at the tip of my tongue I'd like to say here - but out of the respect for the respect and decorum I enjoy on this forum I won't.

 

What I will say is please go find another site to troll. As @@MissJen3 states, this site is for us brides to be supportive and helpful to one another. Nothing you have said fits the bill so please spare us.

 

@@JennyZ, I'm sorry this thread has taken this turn and probably caused you more angst. It has me fired up and it wasn't even my OP. You sound like you have been very thoughtful and considerate and I'm sure you'll find a way to make everything work in the way you and your fiance want for YOUR special day. I highly doubt they are, but if your future in-laws are anything like the above commenter you wouldn't be able to please them anyway! Hang in there!

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With all due respect ladies, I am kind of glad she wrote what she did... It has actually helped out and made me feel a lot better about my situation... I feel WAYYYY more badly, for the poor Bride who gets that MIL!... All of a sudden, financial reasons don't seem quite so bad anymore! lol ;)

 

Thanks for all your kind words

xo

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With all due respect ladies, I am kind of glad she wrote what she did... It has actually helped out and made me feel a lot better about my situation... I feel WAYYYY more badly, for the poor Bride who gets that MIL!... All of a sudden, financial reasons don't seem quite so bad anymore! lol ;)

 

Thanks for all your kind words

xo

Hugs and LOL I was thinking the same - glad she isn't my MIL :) I held my tongue too!

 

 

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I honestly have no words. Well. I have them but they are not appropriate to post here. I am so sorry @@JennyZ that you are dealing with this. I am sure your FI feels horrible as well. Who wants to have the family who causes all the drama? I speak from personal experience when I say, it stinks to have family members who are less than supportive. But, he is exactly right when he points to how positive your family is and views them as his own. 

If by chance, this is all due to similar feelings as have been posted previously, then at least you know that it is their stupidity and selfishness that are preventing them from attending and you can't fix either of those. 

I think what gets lost in planning a wedding is who it really is about. It is NOT about your wishes, comforts, cups, beds, or anything else. How utterly selfish to seem so put out by a happy occasion. Unfortunately, life is short and I would bet my last dollar that many parents wish they could attend their child's wedding and likewise, many children wish their parents were ALIVE to share that special day with them as well. So forgive me, but china and a bed should not be the priority. YOUR CHILD and what he or she has chosen should be. The lack of support is absolutely disgusting to me. 

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Haha!!!! Yes, a little perspective is always helpful, right? I was going to say the same thing but you put it in a nicer way than I could muster ;)

 

With all due respect ladies, I am kind of glad she wrote what she did... It has actually helped out and made me feel a lot better about my situation... I feel WAYYYY more badly, for the poor Bride who gets that MIL!... All of a sudden, financial reasons don't seem quite so bad anymore! lol ;)

 

Thanks for all your kind words

xo

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  • 1 month later...

I just picked up reading this tread and all I can say is WOW! I can't believe the turn it took, but am pleased that it made you think about your situation better @@JennyZ!!

 

That MIL seems to have forgotten the whole point of her sons wedding....to watch her son get married! All she seemed concerned about is how much of an inconvenience it is for them. She also seems to be in the opinion that her future DIL is making all the decisions....while that is mostly true for weddings, I never made a decision without consulting my husband first. Even if I knew he answer would be "Do/get whatever you want" I would still make the point of asking or showing him so he knew what was going on. I'm sure this bride also did the same, and if her husband really had an issue with the location of the wedding he would have said something.

 

We just got back from our wedding about 2 weeks ago, and to be honest we didn't think about the people who didn't attend. Well, we did think of one groomsman who had to back out that it was probably for the best he didn't come as he is pretty intolerant of other people and different cultures, so it was for the best that we didn't have to deal with that! My husband and more family attend than from my side (he had about 10 and I had 7) and the only friends that attended were my MOH and her boyfriend. I can feel for your FI not having many relatives attending, but if they clearly don't want to be there they won't be any fun to be around!!

 

One last thing, when we first told our parents about having a destination wedding they weren't thrilled with the idea. If they did grumble about it no one said anything to us about it. I think my parents really changed their tune after dealing with my sister's wedding in September and all the stress and tears that it caused Turns out all of our guests have the times of their lives and are already planning their trip back next year! Now I can foresee a future awkward situation about having to pick which family to go on vacation with :S

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I can't get over how ignorant people are! (Also I couldn't stop laughing at that MIL statements!! ) I am SO GLAD she is not my MIL; if I was her DIL and read what she had wrote I'd tell her to stay home in her own bed and enjoy her coffee, while all the family that care and support me are with me and my FI!

 

Her statements here upset me so much being an adopted daughter; if my mother felt like that I would be crushed! How rude of you to only think of yourself? I feel badly for your son and I hope you didn't put a damper on their special day!

 

@@JennyZ keep on doing you and making sure you and your FI are happy!!

 

 

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  • 5 weeks later...

@@JennyZ I read every post. Glad to see the all your struggles in having your love ones attend are slowly coming together. Wish you the best wedding in the Riviera Maya with your friends and family.

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