Family Landing The Guilt Trip For Doing A Dw!

[calgarybride2015]

My sister got married in Mexico last year and the aunts/uncles literally were like "Well, she didn't ask US where we wanted her to get married!" and complained about safety and the cost. As if she had some obligation to make her wedding a family reunion with decisions by committee. We live in Chicago (and they don't) so they would have had to fly here and pay $300+ per night for hotel but taxis/food/drinks anyway! They didn't end up coming and most of them didn't even bother to RSVP to tell her for sure that they weren't coming.  And only 1 even sent a card/gift.

 

For my wedding in Jamaica - I'm preventing that headache by not inviting them! Just not even going to deal with it

 

A wedding by committee hehe! 

My fiance's dad wanted us to marry in Ontario so 'I can visit our family'  ummm no!

His family is out east, mine is out west, and everyone would have had travel/hotel costs so it's not that far fetched to go to Mexico.    My first choice was Vegas but we knew at the end of the day that price would be just as high as it's not all inclusive.

[KAT2015]

I had a bit of this as well - my family has known for a long time I would do a destination wedding.  And since we have family and friends in Alberta, Ontario, Texas and England, it only makes sense for everyone to travel.

 

I have put aside some money to assist in my mother's trip if needed, and will use the 'free' rooms with our group bookings to help others. I have enough stress planning a wedding far away I never could have done it here.

 

Besides, my mother has never been on a real vacation since having kids (31 years!) and has never had a chance to go to the Caribbean (and she loves the beach). So by getting married there she is being forced to finally take a vacation!

 

Now they all seem on board - my brother and sister have complained a bit about the cost for a single occupancy, but they have also chosen not to invite a friend or share a room together.  So I can't feel bad about that.

My sister got married in Mexico last year and the aunts/uncles literally were like "Well, she didn't ask US where we wanted her to get married!" and complained about safety and the cost. As if she had some obligation to make her wedding a family reunion with decisions by committee. We live in Chicago (and they don't) so they would have had to fly here and pay $300+ per night for hotel but taxis/food/drinks anyway! They didn't end up coming and most of them didn't even bother to RSVP to tell her for sure that they weren't coming.  And only 1 even sent a card/gift.

 

For my wedding in Jamaica - I'm preventing that headache by not inviting them! Just not even going to deal with it

 

Good idea!!! I only invited one aunt from my side (my mum's younger sister).  I will send invites to the others as to not exclude them but I know they can't afford it and they can't travel for health reasons.

 

My FI has more family on the invite list, but they are all in England so either way they would have had to travel and it is cheaper for them to book a package from the UK to the DR than it is for me to book one from here!!! I guess the English love their holidays (probably because the weather is never great so they actually go away) so its a chance for them to do a great holiday.

 

At the end of the day you have to do what makes you happy.  I am not doing pity invites or inviting people that will make my week more difficult than it needs to be (including an old friend that still thinks we are close).  What you will remember in 50 years is you, your husband, the laughs, the dancing and whatever winds up in photos.  

[Lia33]

My sister got married in Mexico last year and the aunts/uncles literally were like "Well, she didn't ask US where we wanted her to get married!" and complained about safety and the cost. As if she had some obligation to make her wedding a family reunion with decisions by committee. We live in Chicago (and they don't) so they would have had to fly here and pay $300+ per night for hotel but taxis/food/drinks anyway! They didn't end up coming and most of them didn't even bother to RSVP to tell her for sure that they weren't coming.  And only 1 even sent a card/gift.

 

For my wedding in Jamaica - I'm preventing that headache by not inviting them! Just not even going to deal with it

 

That's terrible that they didn't even let her know for sure they weren't coming! Smart choice to not even bother with them! So not worth the headache

 

@@KAT2015 You're right, you definitely can't feel bad about your siblings complaining about the cost when they are choosing to not bring someone - or bunk up! I'm sure your mother will live her wedding/vacation experience!

Edited August 26, 2014 by Lia33