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kcole123

Anyone Else Overwhelmed With Cost?

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Hi there girls,

Well it feels like my idea of a destination "cost effective" wedding has gone down the tubes. It seems to me that this is getting pretty pricey. I originally had a budget of $15,000 and that's with our flights cost and with our parents flights cost with everything. They couldn't afford to go on a trip so myself and fiancé offered to pay because we really want them there...of course. I think I didn't know what was actually involved until I started all this planning. It seems I still have a lot to get and a lot more money to spend. Trying to keep the costs low is very hard, especially when I didn't consider things at the beginning like favors, gifts for the bridal party, fans for the ceremony..etc. I know I don't have to have a lot of things like the fans and stuff but I felt they were probably needed because of the guests staying in the warmth and watching us get married. I still have only paid the deposit on my dress. I need to pay in full once it arrives. Then it's the alterations which are costly. I thought of all the big things at first but none of the simpler details.

 

I don't want a whole lot of decoration for the ceremony because it's going to be held in the garden gazebo and didn't feel a whole lot of decorations were needed. Then I am having a reception on the wedding boat which I only plan on having centerpieces on each table, table clothes, and some lighting. that's it nothing big.

 

I am feeling really overwhelmed with cost. it feels like I even lost track of cost now because of things I purchase online for the wedding. I have gotten a lot of great ideas here on the forum for different websites for certain things and great pricing. But it all adds up. I think I am def. going to be over budget. The good thing is I had $12,000 saved to begin with and just was going to use the rest on credit. My $12,000 is now down to $8000 because of deposits and also the flights. I think I am going to be over budget.

 

I didn't even think of things like programs and menus and stuff that I have seen girls making on here. I don't think I am going to go with that. It's just going to end up costing more money. Keep it simple was what I planned in the beginning.

 

Any of you girls going through this?

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@@kcole123 I think most brides go through what you are going through.  I am a wedding and event planner and extremely frugal and cost conscious and not doing a lot of the costly "extras" but still above the budget I orginally thought.  My advice is don't overly worry about all the little "extras".  Only spend the money of the stuff that means something to you or your furture husband.  I promise no one will remember if you had fans at your wedding (although they can be found pretty inexpensive on amazon or oriental trading co).  I have done events for 1,000+ people and what really matters is why they are there (you and your hubby) food, drinks and if they had a good time.

 

Like you said keep it simple is what you wanted from the beginning so keep it that way.  I am not doing programs or menus either.  Just welcome bags and maybe a little decor on the table.  something simple like a candle in a hurricane glass and maracas at each place setting.

 

Wedding wire has a great budget tool, if you are not already using a budget tool. 


Don't over stress and remember to have fun!  

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hi @@kcole123, I can feel your pain. Costs can quickly add up. I find that for something that I really want (not need) I tend to go outside of my budget. For instance, I don't have to do a TTD photo session, but I really want it, and so $ needed to be spent. Or the fact that my fiance wanted to have the pre-wedding photoshoot in a vineyard instead of around the city (difference of about $500). It is very hard to keep the costs down since we all have the mentality of "this is a once in a lifetime" thing going on.

 

I have a certain leeway for items that I'm willing to go past my budget for and not others.

 

Photography? Yes. I don't think time will reverse and capture my 30 yo self again. So $ needed to be spent.

 

Makeup and hair? Yes. It's part of the picture!

 

Invitation cards/Save the dates/RSVP stuff? No. I don't really remember how mine looks like anymore and half our guests never looked at it. All I have is each invited guest receive one airline ticket (front and back) for the invite. I don't have save the dates or rsvp stuff. My building manager was nice enough to print the invitation free for me. My website was all done by us and Wix is free.

 

OOT bags/Gifts? No. Chances are guests will buy/bring their own stuff. My OOT bag is per couple basis. That is, one deck of cards, one fan, one bag to share pr couple. Most guests will probably be like me--I have my particular brands and own stash already.

I spent $14/couple. If my fiance has his way, there will be no OOT bags at all.

 

Decor? No. Dollar store (so far $80) and DIYs during weekends and evenings.

We did some projects on Vistaprint and ended up spending about $50 (will post pics of them later).

So far, I have only spent $30 for all the paper for the passport brochure. 

 

BM dresses? I don't know about other brides, but it is always the bride that pays for the BM dresses in Chinese culture. I vowed to find a dress that is below $90. I ended up finding one at $68 at Dressbarn on sale.

 

Most of the time I find that brides that made the programs and menus and stuff (with color and theme coordination) don't usually post how much they actually spent on all everything. I think to some people a beautiful wedding is worth more than the price tag...so don't worry about it.

 

I am very liability-adverse, so my mindset is on only spending what I have on my hands.

Edited by Icis

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Hi,

I think some things you mention are not necessary like (programs, menus, fans). Make a list of things that you absolutely must have and go by that. Your guest will have a good time regardless and most of those things you mentioned will probably be left behind anyway.

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Thanks ladies for all your help. I guess I feel like things like OOT bags, fans and whatever for the guests would be appreciated by the guests as they feel like they are getting a little something back for the amount of money they are spending to attend. I wanted to get these little things mainly because I feel like I should be giving something to my guests to show appreciation that they are taking the time off work, spending their hard earned money, and just are going to be there for my FI and I.

 

This is all I plan to do. I am leaving out the programs and menus. I am also not doing the information book/broucher and luggage tags that most people send out before departure.

 

The main things that are costing the money and I feel like we want are:

 

Of course the travel (and we are paying for my parents)

photography

wedding reception on La Barcaza

cocktail hour between the ceremony and reception

my wedding dress (including alterations) which will be over budget because I went $200 over budget on the dress

 

Oh well as long as I have these main things then I am ok with it. I guess if I keep it to how I want then I will be fine. All you ladies have such great ideas on different things and sometimes I feel like maybe I should do that too. But have to stick to what I originally planned in my mind.

 

I don't mind going a little over budget to have the day that we both want.


oh I forgot to mention gifts for the groomsman and bridesmaids.

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@@kcole123 - I felt, and still sometimes do feel this way. I decided to not have wedding programs or dinner menus to cut cost.

In our wedding invitation, I provided the wedding day itinerary. This will also be available on our wedding website. 

 

As far as gifts, I think we are going to do some kind of drink cup... inside it I will put an spf chapstick (I have found VERY inexpensive customized ones), a packet of tylenol or something of that sort, and a little thank you note. Because honestly, most people pack a beach bag, sunblock, aloe etc when they travel to a vacation on a beach, and while it is a nice gesture, that becomes very pricey on us (the brides and grooms).

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I think you should stick to your original plan.  Everyone on here does have Great ideas!  OF course each persons wedding is unique to them and everyone has different reasons for spending money on certain things.  I have a couple of things on my budget now that I can cut if it gets too far past what we planned to spend.  We have had a few additions and I am comfortable with cutting a couple of things without being heart broken.  

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@@pddcmc

I hear ya. I am glad I am not doing the dinner menus or programs. At least this cuts down money and if I were to do them myself it cuts down time.

 

I got a good deal on bags for the guests and I am also giving them a drinking cup to go in it. I don't know what else I will put in it but not going to be very much. I might put the fans in them just to take up some space. But if I do get/find anything else to put in them I am going to the dollar store. It won't be very much going in them besides the drinking cups. I feel a bag, drinking cup, and fan will be just fine. Too much and they probably won't use it anyway like you said. That is all I plan on doing.

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@@kcole123 - I think that sounds perfect! 

 

Take a deep breath, we will both have beautiful, memorable weddings on April 17th!  :)

(I'm saying this for yours and my sanity  ;) )

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I love everyone's ideas!  I thought about the cup idea too since we are staying at an all inclusive could be fun to see our group with matching cups.  Just want to make sure I have enough room to bring anything and avoid shipping.

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