People inviting guests without asking-am I wrong to be irritated?

[raelay]

Am I wrong to be irritated that some people are inviting friends to my wedding without telling me? I wouldn't care if it was a boyfriend or significant other but just to invite a group of girls 3 weeks before my wedding and not telling me. I only found out because my travel agent sent me an updated list(they still haven't told me).  Not to be rude but I have to pay extra for bar service meals, chairs etc. even though it's all inclusive. Anyone had this issue? How did you deal with this and avoid any drama?  I am more just irritated to not ask and assume it's ok. 

[shopnboard]

I don't think you're wrong to be irritated. Guests wouldn't invite random friends to a regular wedding so they shouldn't think it's ok for a DW either. However, I could see how it might get tricky if your guest doesn't know anyone else at the wedding. Is that person inviting the girls just for company? Maybe the girls will just be hanging out at the resort and not actually attending the wedding? The thought has crossed my mind but I'm not sure how the hotel bookings work if that was the case. I only thought of it because someone had asked me if they could bring a plus one to split the room cost. I told my guests that I'm more than happy to help pair them with someone if they're flying solo however I can totally understand if they wouldn't want to room with someone they don't know. For the most part it's been fine, however I have a handful of guests that may not know many others and in those cases I am allowing them a +1. I think you should have a conversation with your guest and find out what's going on. Definitely would have been better if s/he at least gave you a heads up. Hope it works out!

[scolen]

there nothing wrong with you being mad.... you talk should talk to your guest about this issues because its coming out your pocket

[kellisbaby]

Who invites their friends to a wedding they are a guest at???  People are so weird.  Is it possible she just invited friends along for the vacation and they aren't actually coming to your wedding events?

[loquaciouspunky]

I think a lot of people assume because its an all inclusive that everything is free. they dont understand that when it comes to special events and then it's a per person charge.

[GingerJ228]

Are you sure that they are inviting them to your wedding and not just to accompany them on vacation? I went to Hard Rock in DR with a few couples 2 year ago and one of the couples had a welcome dinner one night and the wedding the following but non of us planned on attending, we did our own thing.  Your guests may be planning on making a vacation out of your wedding.  

[KWitt]

The same thing happened with us.  One of my fiancé's uncles invited 3 other couples to make a vacation out of it, but we told them if they book through the travel agent we have no problem with them coming to the wedding because we will get a credit enough to cover the dinner plate. It started as a small wedding and now we have 61 people booked and still 8 months out.  

[kyjanga]

Your anger is completely justified

 

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[HEZZA]

I would be a little irritated, especially if they plan to show up to the dinner portion after you already had your lists - this can add to unexpected costs :/ 

[krisdaversa]

Are you sure that they are inviting them to your wedding and not just to accompany them on vacation? I went to Hard Rock in DR with a few couples 2 year ago and one of the couples had a welcome dinner one night and the wedding the following but non of us planned on attending, we did our own thing.  Your guests may be planning on making a vacation out of your wedding.  

 

 

Am I wrong to be irritated that some people are inviting friends to my wedding without telling me? I wouldn't care if it was a boyfriend or significant other but just to invite a group of girls 3 weeks before my wedding and not telling me. I only found out because my travel agent sent me an updated list(they still haven't told me).  Not to be rude but I have to pay extra for bar service meals, chairs etc. even though it's all inclusive. Anyone had this issue? How did you deal with this and avoid any drama?  I am more just irritated to not ask and assume it's ok. 

 

. I totally agree with Ginger!

 

I know a few people who have invited some others but they aren't attending the wedding and if they did I wouldn't care, my resorts is free for wedding dinners

 

It doesn't bother me, I don't want to hang out 24/7 with all my guest anyways. I want them to feel free to have fun and do their own thing since they are paying big bucks to come.

 

Plus the extra people add up with count so I get more free travelers in my party (every 15th person is free)

 

I could just talk to the person who has the extra people coming and clear the air on if they ask them to attend the wedding or not?