Originally Posted by Jenny2014
I am so dreading this conversation with my parents, because I know it is just going to upset us all... and my mom is going to be so pissy because it's almost mother's day and I am just trying to ruin it for her, blah, blah, blah. And what does it matter if some of those people come, how can I possibly NOT invite my godmother and godfather.... they will pay for all these additional people, so what does it matter......
It matters EVERYTHING. We aren't super close with them, and if we let them invite a few people, then we have to do the same for Amir's parents, and then we are right back to where we are standing. So no one from their list is invited, no one from Amir's parent's list is invited... they all can come to our stupid huge reception. End of discussion. Oh, they all have to fly in from out West? Too bad, so does Amir's dad's siblings... who live in PAKISTAN.
Like frig.... So sad I know the exact fight I am walking into.... but I am doing it on my own, without Amir, because he doesn't need to see my parents at their absolute worst, behaviour wise. He already knows/ see's so much from them and tolerates it... I just don't need my mom being herself and possibly offending him/ having the two of them fighting on top of it. I will take the brunt of my parent's wrath.
Originally Posted by moodyc82
OH I know the feeling girl, hang in there. His mother expects us to have a huge stupid reception when we come home and he straight out told her no, if she wants it than she pays for it. And that the only people invited to the wedding are our CLOSE friends and family. Like sunday she was over for the FI bday dinner and she's like well what friends are you inviting and I'm like the people in the wedding party (6 ppl all together) and that's that. She's like well what about blah blah blah and so and so, and I'm like we don't hang out with them. I'm seriously about to snap on her. Yet my mother and my grandmother haven't asked to invite anyone and are completely ok with EVERYTHING. Like seriously?! So than she's like well when do we have to book by? And I was like we put 10 rooms on hold and when they're gone they're gone and if the resort is sold out than there's nothing I can do so I would suggest you put the $50 deposit down sooner rather than later. Than she had a comment on dresses, about how I shouldn't get a heavy one. I was like I'm going to get whatever I look the best in. Like who care's if I'm hot if I look rockin in it! Smh.....I think when we get back from a trip we're going on in June that the shit is going to hit the fan with all this. Bridezilla here I come....lol
Yikes! I had a lot of those same issues also. My initial wedding should have been in St. Lucia September 27, 2013, but between the crowd (family and some of our friends), my fiance (allowing people to tell him what they want), my house renovation, and my job I almost had a complete meltdown. I made changes due to the circumstances of having travel concerns for the St. Lucia trip since my family is huge and coming from multiple desinations: NY, NJ, MD, Canada, England, and Jamaica. His family is fragmented and apparently most of them and his friends seemed highly unwiling to travel. I refused to get married in Jamaica due to my family being large and i would have had to invite EVERYONE if I did it there, so a number of my family members were fussing about my island selection ignoring the fact that my fiance's family is not from the same island. It just seemed like the airfare was ridiculously high or had long long layovers to get to St. Lucia, then people couldn't gage what their cost would be because we were not staying at an all-inclusive. To avoid any further issues, I changed the whole destination to Punta Cana which has more frequent flight options that are also reasonably priced as well as has more all-inclusive options so that people can eat, drink, be merry, bring their kids (or not). I did want my family and his family to be happy, but not at the cost or our happiness.
I got tired of all of the negativity and my FH and I almost had a huge fight before I told him we can just go to the justice of peace and be done with it all. That's when it dawned on him that we will NEVER please everyone and everyone would have been really pissed if we ran off and eloped...lol. Luckily we took a long deep breath, had a long talk, and came to the conculsion that it's OUR day and it's about what we want to begin the celebration of our lives together. At the end of the day, people have a choice to make and they can either stay home or come and be supportive and have a good time. I know I have made all of the concessions I plan on making for anyone regarding our day. I don't care if we have 20 people or 100, I will be there to marry my honey! Our guests will have endless food options, a nice resort, a nice wedding and surpise great reception at JellyFish. If they choose to be crazy, my FH and I will ignore them and concentrate on OUR beautiful day. Hard to deal with the troublemakers, but if you just keep pushing forward everything will eventually work out.