Congrats!!!! Welcome to the world of destination wedding planning. Most large resorts will accommodate groups from 10-100 people.
Firstly, you can have a dream wedding at a resort--you don't have to compromise on anything. I am having tons of fun planning my wedding.
So here are a few things you may want to do:
1. Choose a country
2. Come up with a rough budget for you and your lucky man AND a budget for your guests. (For example we wanted our guests to pay no more than $1200 per person for 3 nights/4 days).
3. Look at resorts within your preferred price range (There are popular chains such as Sandals, Barcelo, Paradisus, Melia, Palace, Riu etc). These chains may have multiple properties in one city. Some properties offer higher end amenities etc. Once you choose a country, Trip Advisor may be your best bet. Scour the hotels, read reviews etc. and choose your top 3 or 4 resorts.
4. Begin contacting the wedding planners at each of your top resorts. There usually is a link on the website. The initial email should include the following:
--your full name, phone and email address (maybe an estimate of the number of guests)
--preferred dates (have a first, second and third choice) and TIME of your wedding
--request a a pdf of their wedding packages (includes ceremony info, reception info, cocktail hour)
--ask if there are special room rates for your guests. If so, to send that information and what free stuff you can get
--ask if they have a photo album you can view (see what their ceremonies look like, florals, cakes, resort locations etc)
5. Call travel agents that specialize in weddings. (My fiance and I called about 5 different agents to get a feel for the culture of weddings at the resort and we began requesting quotes for a block of rooms for our guests)
6. You may want to hire a wedding planner to do ALL of the planning for you. Sometimes resorts take a few days to respond to emails and that can be stressful. We recently hired a planner that used to work at the resort and since she is working for us she is saving us tons of money.
That's all I have in terms of first steps. Good luck and ask questions before you decide. Also, it's okay to change your mind--we changed resorts three times before deciding on the perfect one.