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Striving for 150!!!


Cherina

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I'm a ways away from 150... My wedding is a little over a year away, and I've already received so many complaints or requestsm or demands.... it's pretty ridiculous. I'm pretty sure it's my wedding... "No" is getting easier and easier to say.
Haha that's true. I didn't even try to hit 150 at first. I just had a ton of questions especially because I joined before selecting a property and using this forum helped me narrow the field. Then I realized I didn't have the ability to open attachments- which isn't too much of a deal breaker. I can still post pictures in my posts and see the ones people upload that way do ah- no biggies.
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We were originally planning on having our wedding here in Canada, but all of a sudden everyone had their opinions. We were tempted to elope as well, but my mom and grams said they have to be there so then it wouldn't really be eloping lol. We decided to say screw it and do a destination wedding because they seem so stress free. But of course, people still have their opinions especially about the cost to travel there, what time of year we chose, who can't come etc. at the end of the day, whoever wants to be there will be come. That's a great idea to just extend the invitation and let people know you're getting married there. Now that sounds stress free :). Congrats on your gown! I have my first appointment this Saturday. I can't wait !!!
It's getting easier and more stress free everyday! Have fun Saturday! I had so much fun with my appointments, but I can't stop thinking about my dress! I can't wait to wear it!
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Originally Posted by EVKnowsitall View Post

 

I feel like eloping every day. Especially since my dress is already done and thats what I was waiting for. But it would kill my mother. Honestly I just want to get married and make babies and buy a house. I spent all my life dreaming of this perfect wedding and discovered its a bitch to plan. I just got into a fight with my sisters- they are twins, both supposed to be bridesmaids and both of them are not coming. They told me its too much money. My sisters. the same people who encouraged me to have a destination wedding in the first place because a wedding in the states was typical, not my style, and boring. I planned it for Mexico- my sister complained. She already was planning a visit to DR. I switched partly because of her. Now she isn't coming.

 

I cried to my fiance that we should have just eloped. I hope things work out but I'm not feeling optimistic at all. I would have better look throwing my invitation on Craigslist than sending it to my family. 

LOL at first this made me laugh the make babies and buy a house! that is kind of how I feel!

 

I agree with everyone I think that we all chose to have the DW so that we could do the wedding easily with zero to no stress, I have decided that I am going to wait a little longer get the quotes one more time and then just book it, I made peace before we started planning that I will be fine with whoever comes and not stress about the people that cant come, the only reason that I am upset about it all is because of the mistake that my TA made, but at the end of the day it is what it is... and I dont think that asking people to go on a vacation to paradise is such a hardship, oh and by the way while we are all in paradise we are going to get married! man how dare I! LOL

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Wow I feel like I missed so much of the conversation over the weekend! I definitely agree that DW are almost no less stressful than weddings at home. However, we are doing the wedding that we always dreamed of and giving people the opportunity to take the trip of a lifetime. Most of the time people never plan vacations because they have no reason to "spend all that money". Guess what....we are finally giving them a reason!! I, too, have made terms with the fact that not everyone will be there, but those that really care will make the effort. My FI and I got engaged in May, but with my job (state legislature) I cannot take off at that time. So, we will also be engaged for a little over a year since our wedding is in August. I wish the wedding was here already, but I have soooooo much to do that I am lucky it isn't here yet. I'm one of those brides on a budget, so I definitely needed some extra time to save up a little more.

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Congrats missde09!and welcome to the forum :) I concur with making full use of your time over the next year....plus it will give you more time to find those helpful bargins to meet your budget parameters........happy research + planning and wishing you the wedding of your dreams! cheers :)

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Originally Posted by Lyman View Post

 

Congrats missde09!and welcome to the forum :) I concur with making full use of your time over the next year....plus it will give you more time to find those helpful bargins to meet your budget parameters........happy research + planning and wishing you the wedding of your dreams! cheers :)

 

Thanks Lyman! I am trying to keep the excitement going by doing little things here and there. You are right! It certainly helps me find those good deals! Just went to a brides on a budget expo this past weekend and won a free engagement photo shoot!!

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Originally Posted by missde09 View Post

 

 

Thanks Lyman! I am trying to keep the excitement going by doing little things here and there. You are right! It certainly helps me find those good deals! Just went to a brides on a budget expo this past weekend and won a free engagement photo shoot!!

Thats awesome congrats!!! I am having my moms best friends son do our for a case of beer! LOL he is in second year photography and won't let me pay him! But winnig them thats really exciting! pinkie.gif

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Originally Posted by jolene028 View Post

 

LOL at first this made me laugh the make babies and buy a house! that is kind of how I feel!

 

I agree with everyone I think that we all chose to have the DW so that we could do the wedding easily with zero to no stress, I have decided that I am going to wait a little longer get the quotes one more time and then just book it, I made peace before we started planning that I will be fine with whoever comes and not stress about the people that cant come, the only reason that I am upset about it all is because of the mistake that my TA made, but at the end of the day it is what it is... and I dont think that asking people to go on a vacation to paradise is such a hardship, oh and by the way while we are all in paradise we are going to get married! man how dare I! LOL

LOL Just the way my crazy mind works haha. But the truth is, if you had asked me a few years ago what was important- I was more obsessed with the wedding itself than the marriage. I reached a place where now the marriage is my concern. I am eager to start a family and get on with the rest of life. Sure I want our wedding to be perfect- but other people need to understand it is a sacred event that is about two people who truly love each other and are ready to vow to be together through it all. I actually love my pre-marital precana classes that I take with my fiance because I took them so I could get married in a Catholic church and didn't think a couple who has been together for 6 years, and living together for three, would have anything to gain from the classes but I was wrong. The priest said "We spend all this time finding the right dress, the right cake, making invitations- but no one takes time to work on what's important- the marriage." I think about that quote whenever I feel myself getting upset over trivial things.

 

You're right- it's not a horrible thing to ask people to vacation with you. People act like its a burden. But if you can't go say no- I'm not offended. I get more upset when people feel the need to give me their laundry list of reasons why they can't attend because I feel like it turns into them trying to make me feel guilty for my decision. "I can't go because I'm trying to visit my dying grandmother and my dog needs to be boarded and my son is turning 21 and I have another wedding. I wish you were getting married here." Someone actually told me "you have to understand the burden you are placing on people." I'm like I didn't force anyone I invited you! Can't come- I'm fine with that. Want to join in? WOOHOO! lol My friends responded a lot more positively than our families. My friends were like "You are smart. I wish I had a destination wedding. Still paying for my wedding and it was over before I even realized." 

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Originally Posted by EVKnowsitall View Post

 

 The priest said "We spend all this time finding the right dress, the right cake, making invitations- but no one takes time to work on what's important- the marriage." I think about that quote whenever I feel myself getting upset over trivial things.

 

You're right- it's not a horrible thing to ask people to vacation with you. People act like its a burden. But if you can't go say no- I'm not offended. I get more upset when people feel the need to give me their laundry list of reasons why they can't attend because I feel like it turns into them trying to make me feel guilty for my decision. "I can't go because I'm trying to visit my dying grandmother and my dog needs to be boarded and my son is turning 21 and I have another wedding. I wish you were getting married here." Someone actually told me "you have to understand the burden you are placing on people." I'm like I didn't force anyone I invited you! Can't come- I'm fine with that. Want to join in? WOOHOO! lol My friends responded a lot more positively than our families. My friends were like "You are smart. I wish I had a destination wedding. Still paying for my wedding and it was over before I even realized." 

 

I love that quote - it's sooooo true!!  For a while (about a day) I was upset about my decor falling through, and then in the end I realized, who cares, I'm still marrying the man I love, with our without balloons.  Now I've decided not to plan another thing and just take it as it comes.

 

I am so lucky, both our families have been soo supportive - no one has really complained about the price, or the fact that they have to go anywhere, and the people who cannot come just said no and that was that.  So I haven't really had to field anyones rude comments.  I really feel for you ladies to have to deal with people calling you a burden, and making demands.   I would feel like complete crap if I was being beaten down like that over such a happy occassion.

 

it's true..weddings get judged so harshly - but next time you're invited to a wedding pay attention to what people are saying about it..it's not only your wedding they judge.  EVERY wedding gets judged and by people who have no right.

 

Just remember - all those a-holes who are giving you excuses and making you feel bad - be glad you're going away and don't have to pay a dime to feed them at an at home wedding, because they'de be saying nasty things about your wedding even if it was at home, and the problem is they'de come to that one..and it costs you money!  It just shows people's true colors.

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