Mother vs. All-Inclusive

[jamie1519]

Oh boy. I think I have finally narrowed a location down to Cancun/Riviera Maya (still have Bahamas and Puerto Rico on the list though...) BUT, my mom is against the AI concept. She believes if we are asking people to come away for a wedding, WE should be paying for the majority of the meals (basically, welcome party, rehearsal, reception, and bruncheon). I need some AI info/benefits/ammunition!!

[LCBride2007]

ok, let's pretend that logic even makes sense (IMO, it doesn't at all). these people are choosing to go on a vacation too ... they're not required to come to the wedding!

 

anyway, pretending that even makes sense. they're still going to have meals and drinks (and snacks, and more drinks, etc.) throughout their vacation. are you going to give them all of their spending money? doubt it! an AI really makes sense for everyone - I think it saves money for both sides!

[jamie1519]

THANK YOU!!! This is just what I need!

[Rachelle E.]

I very much agree w/ Ann. Unless your mom is willing to pay for all the food/drinks/snacks etc for the guests. . .that's not a very sensible idea, IMO.

 

Obviously you'd be paying for the events/meals she mentioned anyway. Even at an AI, the dinner for the reception or any other special parties (with your own servers, menu, bar etc) cost XX amount per person - that you as the hosts will be paying for. With those costs, plus the cost of the wedding itself...I can't imagine she's really that concerned about whether or not the guests can eat or drink their little hearts out in their spare time! lol! Besides, a lot of hotels offer a complimentary breakfast w/ a stay...is she going to still buy breakfast for people every day even if it's included?

 

Also, as someone who was just a guest at a destination wedding...I LOVED that we were at an AI! Bascially once we were there, DH and I didn't have to worry about paying for anything besides our activites (spa, golf etc) and that was a relief! Also, If I knew someone was covering my tab...I wouldn't indulge as freely in the mango daquiris out of guilt! :-)

[Can'tHardlyWait]

I just want to second Rachelle's post - I am spending over $75 a person for my wedding reception dinner at an AI... on top of that, I am having a buffet rehearsal dinner thats close to $50 a person... obviously this doesnt include flowers, decorations, music, etc... Tell your mother she can rest assured that this wedding will cost you PLENTY (hehe)

[TATrisha]

Yup, I'm paying in addition to the AI as well. I guess i felt like I didn't want my guests paying for the meal either... so I found a happy medium! An AI resort which will allow me to upgrade the dinner package! That way everyone's food and drink is covered for their whole vacation, but they still get something special for our wedding

[rodent]

I fly out of state for weddings pretty often. No one pays for my plane ticket, hotel room, meals that I have to eat out because I'm out of town, rental car, gas, etc. I don't expect them to. When someone invites you to their wedding, you have the option to say no. I have not gone to some weddings, because I had already flown to much that year & didn't want to spend extra money.

 

Also, as a wedding guest I'm usually not wanting the bride & groom to spend a lot of money on me. I'd rather go & have a good time with them. i don't care how much they spent on me. I'd prefer to know they saved money to buy a home together, raise kids, or whatever. I'm not there to be showered with gifts or meals, etc.

 

I don't think spending money on people is the only way to show you care. We all want to show our guests we appreciate them flying out, but there are many other ways to do that.

[jamie1519]

Thank you all for the back-up! I know it's the way to go, esp in RM.

I think she may be coming around - she just sent a forward about a Dreams location! Now onto picking the resort.....sigh....

[rodent]

people aren't used to thinking about DW's so sometimes their initial reaction isn't how they continue to feel. My mom wasn't thrilled with an AI at first because she thought it would cost more. Once she looked into it, she will probably stay AI for her annual cozumel trips.

 

So once your mom knows more about how it works she may realize an AI can be a great way to go.

[jamie1519]

Oh I completely agree, people need it to sink in. When we first told my future MIL about a DW she looked like she was about to faint...now she's all excited, calling me all the time with all sorts of suggestions! (not sure if I would have preferred the opposite reaction actually....