Jump to content

Photo

what to do when your bridesmaid thinks the wedding is about her


  • Please log in to reply
8 replies to this topic

#1 iddress

iddress
  • Banned
  • 13 posts

    Posted 06 August 2012 - 05:24 PM


    My bridesmaid is getting out of control.

    My sister is my MOH and has been really supportive and said no matter what dress, hair or makeup i pick for her she will be happy as that's what i

    want.

    My best friend who's my bridesmaid is driving me crazy. All she talks about is how she wants HER hair, HER makeup and what style of dress SHE wants.

    I want them to have natural elegant makeup. She wants a slinky sexy dress, i want a nice knee length chiffon dress.

    Everything i send her pictures of she disagrees with and sends me pictures of glammed up models she wants. Now all she is talking about is her

    wedding, she doesn't have a boyfriend so i don’t know why she is doing this.

    I'm not being unreasonable and I’ve let them have input into what they want but she is driving me crazy, i would never put them in anything that

    didn't suit them both.

    I don’t know what to do Anyone else experienced this?



    #2 imjalar

    imjalar
    • Newbie
    • 8 posts

      Posted 06 August 2012 - 06:43 PM

      Who is paying for the dress?

      I ask because as much as it is your day, if she is footing the bill for the dress it is fair she has at least some input to what she will be buying. Though even if that is the

       



      #3 indress

      indress
      • Banned
      • 4 posts

        Posted 06 August 2012 - 07:52 PM

        All I know is that I am eternally grateful one of my good friends did not ask me to be bridesmaid at her very recent wedding because I just had a devastating relationship breakdown a few weeks becore and we have absolutely opposite style tastes and I would have found it really stressful to agree to all her demands when I was barely able to get out of bed in the morning!

        Good luck!


         



        #4 indress

        indress
        • Banned
        • 4 posts

          Posted 06 August 2012 - 07:53 PM

          It's sad...she's probably just feeling bad about the fact she is single. Unfortunately we are conditioned as women to think the ultimate thing to achieve in life is to get married....try to have some empathy for her. When you are single and having to focus on someone else who has everything you don't...it can bring out the worst in otherwise good people. (assuming this selfish behavior is not normal!!)

          Just be firm and follow the above suggestions. Say how grateful you are that she is prepared to ignore how she would do things herself in the interests of giving you your dream wedding in the style that you prefer. And say how excited you are to one day to help her achieve the wedding that is her style.
           



          #5 lkminga

          lkminga
          • Newbie
          • 11 posts

            Posted 06 August 2012 - 09:36 PM

            I think i will say something to her when we go bridesmaid dress shopping next week.

            Doesn’t mean it doesn’t make me feel bad. I guess in a way I’m lucky my sister and her are so different in body types and looks, so I just keep saying to her “Well remember that it needs to suit my sister and look good on her as well”

            Driving me crazy.


             



            #6 indress

            indress
            • Banned
            • 4 posts

              Posted 06 August 2012 - 09:39 PM

              http://thekindlife.c...ng-is-about-her


              #7 indress

              indress
              • Banned
              • 4 posts

                Posted 06 August 2012 - 09:41 PM


                All I know is that I am eternally grateful one of my good friends did not ask me to be bridesmaid at her very recent wedding because I just had a devastating relationship breakdown a few weeks becore and we have absolutely opposite style tastes and I would have found it really stressful to agree to all her demands when I was barely able to get out of bed in the morning!

                Good luck!
                 



                #8 Mufin1785

                Mufin1785
                • Jr. Member
                • 438 posts

                  Posted 07 August 2012 - 06:39 AM

                  I would take her to the side and talk to her.  Explain that you would appreciate it if she was more supportive of your decisions and planning a wedding is stressful enough. Bridesmaids are supposed to help you with your planning not stress you out. 

                   

                  My FI sister is standing in my wedding and she is the only one that has an issue with dresses, hair  and shoes, however she is the only one I don't have a good relationship with to talk to her about this.  All my other bridesmaids would be fine if I asked them to wear a burlap sack lol.  Good luck! 



                  #9 TheWolferts

                  TheWolferts
                  • Jr. Member
                  • 458 posts

                    Posted 07 August 2012 - 07:09 AM

                    Even if she is paying for the dress, it is her job as a BM to support you in anything you choose for YOUR wedding!

                     

                    If she doesnt think she can get on board with the BM dresses you pick or the make up style, then maybe she doesnt deserve to be a BM. If she is really getting crazy, you might point it out to her and hopefully she falls in line.

                     

                    Unless you are being a complete bridezilla, dont feel bad about going with you vision. You dont want to regret any decisions you make about your wedding because a "friend" influenced you to pick something you didnt want.

                     

                     

                    Originally Posted by iddress 


                    My bridesmaid is getting out of control.

                    My sister is my MOH and has been really supportive and said no matter what dress, hair or makeup i pick for her she will be happy as that's what i

                    want.

                    My best friend who's my bridesmaid is driving me crazy. All she talks about is how she wants HER hair, HER makeup and what style of dress SHE wants.

                    I want them to have natural elegant makeup. She wants a slinky sexy dress, i want a nice knee length chiffon dress.

                    Everything i send her pictures of she disagrees with and sends me pictures of glammed up models she wants. Now all she is talking about is her

                    wedding, she doesn't have a boyfriend so i don’t know why she is doing this.

                    I'm not being unreasonable and I’ve let them have input into what they want but she is driving me crazy, i would never put them in anything that

                    didn't suit them both.

                    I don’t know what to do Anyone else experienced this?






                    0 user(s) are reading this topic

                    0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users