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Any other 2014 brides here getting an early start?

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Originally Posted by Jennkn87 View Post
 

I know. I originally thought, since there are no blood tests/translations it would be just as easy and you wouldn't have two dates, plus we are having an at home reception. (not that you have a special date for that). At the resort we chose...it is $300 for the legal ceremony, and $150 for the symbolic ceremony. I figure...thats $150 more that I can use torwaruallds decor or something else. I'm on the fence still...but the more I read about it the more I'm thinking it would be just as easy to get married here first. I'm afraid if we told anyone, however, his parents would throw a fit. They are already causing drama about this whole wedding and the fact that we are leaving the country for it. I'm trying not to let them stress me out!!

 

Yeah see I know I would end up saying something to my mom - actually I think I already did tell her we were thinking about doing it....  she didn't really say anything one way or the other but I don't know if everyone would be so okay with it.. I dont want anyone to feel like "this isn't a wedding"    I am also having an AHR :) 

 

I totally understand the idea of using the money for other things though.  For me.. with all the inclusions I am getting (that would not be included if I did a "vow renewal") it pretty much breaks even so that didn't sway my decision but if that wasn't the case I might have a different feeling on it.

 

I actually thought my FI might want to do the at home thing first but when I ran it by him he said "why would we do that - lets get married at our wedding!?"  hahah sooooo I agreed

 

it is a tough call - part of me also thought it might be fun to have a secret fun special day that only we knew about!    You will figure it out and go with your heart!

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You are definitely right about the secret special day! I know I wouldn't be able to keep it a secret to my mom either. She would probably be like..what is the point of doing it both places? But she would def understand once I told her about saving the money! I'll probably wait to make that decision until I see how much everything else is going to end up costing me. My other predicament is...I lose my insurance through my parents at the end of December. With all of the new healthcare laws and such my job changed alot of their policies. I work in healthcare and in my field (Radiology) the field is VERY tight right now, there are NO jobs available, especially when you live in a smaller town. I work "part-time" at one hospital and PRN(as needed) at another. I was hoping to get more hours at the one and get insurance. Now that isn't going to happen. So it looks like I can either pay for my own which from what I hear and have read about is SUPER expensive, or I can go on my fiancees...which would be mean we would need to be married legally. :wacko: Confusing. I don't think we could get married that soon and keep it a secret till next September! LOL. But it's crossed my mind also for that reason..that way I maybe wouldn't have to pay for my own insurance for as long. It's a predicament!!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by Jennkn87 View Post
 

You are definitely right about the secret special day! I know I wouldn't be able to keep it a secret to my mom either. She would probably be like..what is the point of doing it both places? But she would def understand once I told her about saving the money! I'll probably wait to make that decision until I see how much everything else is going to end up costing me. My other predicament is...I lose my insurance through my parents at the end of December. With all of the new healthcare laws and such my job changed alot of their policies. I work in healthcare and in my field (Radiology) the field is VERY tight right now, there are NO jobs available, especially when you live in a smaller town. I work "part-time" at one hospital and PRN(as needed) at another. I was hoping to get more hours at the one and get insurance. Now that isn't going to happen. So it looks like I can either pay for my own which from what I hear and have read about is SUPER expensive, or I can go on my fiancees...which would be mean we would need to be married legally. :wacko: Confusing. I don't think we could get married that soon and keep it a secret till next September! LOL. But it's crossed my mind also for that reason..that way I maybe wouldn't have to pay for my own insurance for as long. It's a predicament!!

 

I totalllllly understand... I had the same thought about insurance - it is a very logical reasonable reason.... 

 

have you talked to your FI to get his feelings on it?

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He usually is pretty much on board with anything!! Since it would be helping us out financially he wouldn't mind at all.

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Originally Posted by Jennkn87 View Post
 

I'm getting SOOOOO close!!!! :cheer2:

 

Loooks like you made it YAY!!!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Jennkn87 View Post
 

He usually is pretty much on board with anything!! Since it would be helping us out financially he wouldn't mind at all.

 

well it is good he is open.... well at least you still have some time to figure out what you wanna do !!

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Originally Posted by Jennkn87 View Post
 

I'm bringing up the subject of...Legal vs. Symbolic ceremony. Who is doing what? Is it easier do the legal thing before you head down for your DW? It seems to me with the little research and threads that I have read it would be ALOT cheaper. I would worry what day we should celebrate our actual anniversay on? If we decide to do it this way (which I'm leaning torwards the more I read) I would do the legal part HUSH HUSH, where only the FI and I were there. No one needs to know the ceremony on the beach is "pretend"! :mswink:  What is everyone elses thoughts?

We're doing it on the day we actually wanted to get married, or some we hope, which is March 16th. It's our anniv and his brother ruined it for us b/c he'll "be in school". Mind you March 16th is a weekend. We aren't telling anyone when we do it....well except u girls here and we will probably celebrate the DW date. It's just easier to get married at home

 

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Originally Posted by m8chow View Post
 

Happy 150 Jennkn87!!!

YAY

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Originally Posted by RaynDrop View Post
 

 

so I have been planning for about a year already - I am 366 days from my wedding... the resort and wedding date are booked... we told everyone that is invited in April but have not announced are wedding outside of those that are invited ..  and I haven't gotten my office proposal.  ... so I get it...    after our very casual convo about finally getting married I knew we would do a DW .. I didn't want him to feel pressured to propose but I wanted to give people plenty of time to plan...    so I totally get it and I don't think what you are doing is silly at all!!!

 

Aw I didn't know you were also waiting for your official proposal! You are so organized and on top of things!! Although I mentioned it to DBF the other day that I want to start contacting resorts and planning stuff but I don't want to do it without being engaged...and he said soon enough! hehe. 

 

to Jennk87: I'm all for a legal ceremony if you need it to be on his insurance to help you save money! I agree that it does pose a problem that you have to keep it a secret from your family (if you choose) and which one to celebrate. On the other hand, it'll be nice to have a secret day to celebrate for just the two of you, and also celebrate the day of the symbolic ceremony! Is there any way you can arrange it so that they are on the same day of the month at least? That way they each are connected!

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