With just over 4 months to go, my FI just found out that his BM can't make it to our wedding. He's starting a new job shortly and they will not permit him to take time off that soon. It's very disappointing but he's a victim of circumstance and hopefully this won't affect their friendship.
My FI is of course very disappointed, and I'm really, really sad for my FI...for more reasons than just this...and I would appreciate your thoughts about what to do.
Our invites are out and the RSVP deadline is less than two weeks away, and as of now, my FI has only ONE friend who has confirmed he'll be there (and only verbally, not booked travel yet). Some of his other friends who all along have been talking about coming, are, one by one, telling us they can't make it. There are a lot of people we haven't heard anything from either way, so hopefully he'll have more friends attending.
He's not sure what to do - should he ask someone else (once they've put down their deposit!) to step in as BM or will that make that person feel second-rate? I've read about other Groomâ€™s who've asked family (dad/brothers) when this happened to them, but that's a whole other problem...none of FI's family has booked; none has even suggested they'll be there, so at this point we can't count on any of them.
His friend (whoâ€™s verbally confirmed) is an old friend and a good friend, but painfully shy and a bit socially awkward. I think he'd be happy to step in as a witness at the ceremony but we donâ€™t think heâ€™ll be comfortable giving a speech. We really donâ€™t know heâ€™d plan a bachelor party either. I know the bachelor party isnâ€™t a must-do thing, but I really want it for my FI considering the lack of family support and attendance and now with his BM bailingâ€¦heâ€™s really bummed.
Thoughts? Does he ask someone else or leave it?
How can I ensure he has positive and fun experiences moving forward?
I was even thinking of planning something for just the two of us (in case he doesnâ€™t have a bachelor party)â€¦?