PLUS 1's

[Adesir8]

Hi Brides!

 

Need some help re: single friends bringing a plus 1

 

Right now, our list is at 150, anticipating that about 70-80 will show up.  A few of the single folk have asked if they can bring someone (not on the guest list), just to travel with/share the room, but that person would not be included in the wedding festivities. 

 

Discussed it with my fiance, and we feel horrible about this.  Wouldn't want someone to come spend time with us in the days before our wedding, but then not be allowed to come to the actual wedding.  At the same time, I don't want to say yes to every single person, and have our guest list just get blown out the water.

 

Would love to know your thoughts on this fellow brides. HELP ME! hehehehe

 

Thanks!!

[mmb1117]

 I completely understand how you feel. We have several single friends that we will allow to bring guests. Our opinion is that it is the least we can do for people paying to come all the way to our wedding. We are doing the sit down dinner which is extra per person, but I can't say no to anyone who comes all that way. It is a tough decision, but always remember it is your day

[Adesir8]

you're so right! both to it being the least we can do and it being my (ahem our) day. hehehehe

We're going to play it by ear as the day approaches. Thanks mmb1117!

[sbg75]

It is such a difficult decision and I hope you can find a way to answer without causing any offence. Good luck but yes, do remember that it is your day.

[maridr2012]

Its always such a difficult decision to have to decide if a guest can have a plus 1. From the beginning we decided due to budget AND space constraints that only married, engaged, or couples living together would be allowed a plus 1. The exception to that were our wedding attendants. 1of my bridesmaids has a significant other who can't go due to work so shes bringing her sister. And thebest man is in midst of a breakup so we think he's bringing a guy friend who the family has known for years, so it works out. I've had several guests ask if they can bring adage and I've been lucky to not get any guilt trips when I explain they can't due to space constraints. They will bring the date on vacation and immediately after our reception everyone will re-group at the disco. Hopefully if we get enough declines I may be able to include them!

[mrlddst]

We are including the +1s.  For those who are inviting whole other families, they are on their own. 

[katman]

This is a really helpful thread. I have been humming & hawing over this one...We have a lot of young guests who are single/not in serious relationships and I'm not sure if our budget will allow for accommodating everyones +1 for the wedding festivities.  Did you all include +1 on the invitation or just addressed the issue if/when guests requested to bring someone along?

 

Quote:

Originally Posted by maridr2012 

 They will bring the date on vacation and immediately after our reception everyone will re-group at the disco. Hopefully if we get enough declines I may be able to include them!

I think that's a good idea - if space opens up due to other invitees RSVPing "no" then why not fill in with others +1!! Great thought.

[maridr2012]

For the singles I've only addressed it to the 1 person being invited. I'm hoping people know etiquette and if it isn't addressed as "...and Guest" they'll know it means it's only them. But, I guess I'll know if they know etiquette when I start getting the RSVPs back lol. I did get asked by some friends if they could bring a date when they received the save the dates.. So those people already know I'm only inviting them.

[Adesir8]

Originally Posted by maridr2012 

 

Its always such a difficult decision to have to decide if a guest can have a plus 1. From the beginning we decided due to budget AND space constraints that only married, engaged, or couples living together would be allowed a plus 1. The exception to that were our wedding attendants. 1of my bridesmaids has a significant other who can't go due to work so shes bringing her sister. And thebest man is in midst of a breakup so we think he's bringing a guy friend who the family has known for years, so it works out. I've had several guests ask if they can bring adage and I've been lucky to not get any guilt trips when I explain they can't due to space constraints. They will bring the date on vacation and immediately after our reception everyone will re-group at the disco. Hopefully if we get enough declines I may be able to include them!

GREAT idea!  Thinking it through, for now we're going to invite the singles, and they'll be able to bring their guest if they like, but that person won't come to the wedding.  If we get enough declines, then we'll be able to include them. Regrouping at the disco later is a good idea.

 

thanks everyone!

[Avens]

When we invited singles, it was kind of assumed that they had a plus one, because the trip was MUCH more expensive for a single.  I know I wouldn't want to come to Mexico for a week, hang out with people all week, then have to be by myself all day while my roomate/friend etc.and everyone else was doing wedding stuff.  So if someone brought a friend along, we included them in the festivities, however someone asked if their brother and girlfriend could come, and I said they were welcome to come and use the group rate- however there wouldn't be room for them at the reception (most likely).

 

It worked well - we were also ruthless with inviting though, and anticipated every invitation was a potential 2 people.