Destination Wedding Not Taken Seriously

[janette34]

I was married on April 16 and this has been bothering me ever since so I hope someone else feels the same way I do.  It seems that since we decided to have a destination wedding that no one has taken it seriously and I feel I've been "ripped off" in some areas.

 

For starters there almost wasn't a stagette for me.  If it wasn't for a friend of mine calling my mother  2 weeks before we left it never would have happened.  So with only a week before we left for Mexico a very short notice party was arranged.  It was nice to have a little gathering before leaving for Mexico but with such short notice not that many were able to attend and not one person brought a gift.  Now don't get me wrong I wasn't expecting gifts or in any need of things but come on, a card would have been nice.

 

Departure Day - this wedding had been in the works for a year and I planned my heart out, right down to making everyone in flight snack packs with homemade seahorse & starfish cookies, gum, snacks, customized brochure, etc.  Out of the 35 people who travelled with us I think about 3 thanked me. 

 

OOT Bags - again a year's of work and these were handed out during a welcome dinner at the resort and I can tell you that exactly 3 people personally thanked me for the gifts.

 

Husband's Brother & Sister in Law - my husband has one brother and he's only 2 years older than him.  They get along fine but they couldn't find the time to call us before we left to congratulate us or wish us luck.  They didn't come to the wedding b/c at first they couldn't affort it - then went and bought a new truck & camper.  2nd excuse was b/c their daughter is diabetic and from what friends told them about the DR (hello, we're not going there, we're going to Mexico) she would get sick and no one would be able to help her b/c doctors in 3rd world countries don't know how to treat diabetics.  His niece's birthday was the day after we got home so went to visit them and they didn't congratulate us or ask about the trip.  We brought it up and still just blank expressions.

 

Wedding Night - we had our wedding at a private location on the resort that required a shuttle to get back and forth.  When the night was over and the shuttle came to pick us up everyone jumped on leaving myself, my husband & my mother with our hands full of flowers, shoes, etc.  No one offered to get off and let us on even though it was obvious that we were struggling to carry/hold everything until I made a slightly too loud comment about the bride & groom getting priority. 

 

Arrival Home - since we come home we have received exactly 5 cards, 3 from guests who travelled with us.

 

We did not get married for the gifts/money but I just feel like everyone has forgotten about us, whats wrong with sending a card with congratulations. 

 

Oh and here's another good one about a week before we left I got an email from my TA asking if it was alright for 2 people whom I've never met to go to the wedding and reception - WTF?  Long story short 2 of our guests switched tour operators and these 2 strangers filled their places and as it turned our were friends of my aunt.  My answer was no since I did not want to pay for 2 more people whom I've never met or pack more items for the ceremony decor for them.  I did say it was ok for them to come after the dinner and join the reception - what a mistake!  They guy was a total ass and made some really rude comments through out the evening.

[Nino]

Its funny to see how people really are when something like a wedding comes. we are going through something similar, but havent even got married, the date is July 24 and out of our friend only 2 have booked their trip, noone had even mention or RSVP, is like it its not happening in less then 3 months. I told one of my BM that I havent seen in a long time to come and get her dress and she said that she had to discuss the trip with her husband (he is one of the GM) and these was a week ago. I think they should have discuss it a long time ago when they said yes to be part of the wedding party. but what ever if the come great if not great too..

 

The important thing is that you are now married and had a great time.

Good luck and congratulations.......

[sbg75]

Oh that just sucks. I really hope that you can try to think of the good memories of the day and just enjoy being married without letting thoughtless people ruin it. Try to remember that they are probably wrapped up in their own lives and as much as it is selfish and hurtful, I would hope that they don't mean to be.

 

Congratulations x

[balibride]

Goodness me this thread is awful.... You poor girls. My advice would be to ignore them .... Your wedding is about you and your h2b, and if you had /have an amazing time that's a.ll that matters x

[HarborLiving]

So sorry!  That really does suck and for all of us planning a destination wedding, very scary!!!  I echo the other brides, this day was special for you and your Mr.  Just remember to leave all the bums at home for your 1 year anniversary <3

[tyrebride2b2013]

I agree with you on being kinda short changed with the whole DW.  I have a cousin getting married right before me and it seems as her wedding is more important than mine.  I can't help but feel hurt at times and at times find myself wanting to cancel my DW and have an AHW even though I am planning an AHR when we return to make me feel better about not having a lot of family attend the DW..

[wallabymeisje]

i am sorry that happened i am fearful that it might happen to me too but at least my aunts threw me a bridal shower so i feel like most of the family is taking this marriage thing seriously, i still feel that i gave people 2 years notice and they are telling me that they didnt have time or money and feel like i am not worth enough to them when i have traveled in the past to their weddings and/or kids events

[TA Babs]

I am so sorry that happened to you.  If you have an anniversary party, you should invite BDW members who will truly appreciate everything you have done!

[kellykanester]

I know how disapointing all the little things can be to a bride after you have put your whole heart and sanity into planning the perfect day. But you have to remember in the end it is about you and your hubby and the begining of your lives together, not about all the other people.

[Tulumbride2013]

I second TA babs! I'll come to the party. I'm worried about my similar situation. My fiances mom has told me, oh you don't need centerpieces, you don't need favors, ect. It's my wedding and I want it pretty! In addition I was forced to invite my future brother in laws horrible rude gf, brother said he would not attend if she wasn't invite. I have known her for two years and she as never spoken to me. Grrrrrrr. Anywho I do congratulate you on your marriage, I bet it was beautiful. Your future will hold so many great things you won't even need their warm wishes!