I totally feel your pain..!! All of my bridesmaids (with the exception of my MOH) backed out and bailed on me! My FI has 4 guys on his side and I have 1. I've ended up having to ask people to be my BMs who I wouldn't normally have asked. Don't get me wrong, I love them but they weren't my first choices and I feel bad because that's not even fair to them.
We had a million people saying they'd go and they were all really pumped - even when we told them the price. We did not get a single RSVP after we sent out the invites - I started Facebooking and texting people and even then, I barely got any responses.
It's so incredibly frustrating and we're starting to regret the whole DW idea. We've even had people tell us the Mexico trip is pointless since we're having a reception back home!! Once we heard that, we canceled the AHR and told people that it was because of my school schedule. If they don't care about us enough to come to Mexico to watch us get married (especially when we know they can totally afford it), then we don't care enough about them to hold a reception on our dime when we get back!
We told people we were getting married in Mexico well over a YEAR before the trip. We told people in September 2011 to start saving for January 2013 but clearly people don't actually take anything seriously until closer to the date and, SURPRISE - they can no longer afford it in time.
My cousin got married in the Dominican and it cost $2600. I was a full-time student working part-time and I managed to save the entire amount within 10 months. Most of our friends live at home and don't pay bills or they're family that is well-established financially. It's really upsetting that these people don't care enough to save some money and share in our special day.
I'm glad that I'm not the only one going through this (but also sad that others are having the same problem). Every destination wedding I've seen in my group of friends always has a huge turnout - and some of the resorts are waaaaay more expensive than ours! One of my friends had a whopping 90 people at her wedding! It's like pulling teeth to get people to even TELL us they're coming or not.
One of the main things that bothers me is that the resort we booked was not my first choice. My first choice of resort was more expensive but had a cheaper wedding package ($5000 cheaper!) but we decided to go with a less expensive resort with the more expensive wedding package so that people would be more willing to come. Now we're stuck paying way more than we wanted for the wedding and nobody is coming!
Sometimes I just want to scream. I keep trying to tell myself not to stress but it's tough. And it makes planning impossible when you don't know numbers. Rahh..!
Okay I'm done haha.. Feels nice to vent! Phew..