I wont start asking them until a few days after my RSVP..but I can't really sit around and wait either. See, the thing is, that a good portion of these people all said they would absolutely 100% go...which I know is very common and then folks flake out for one reason or another. But..we have 125 guests invited. Our reception space only holds up to 70 people, anything more than that, then we have no choice but to move it to another space - the ballroom which I didnt like at all when I had my site visit. Of the 125 people, we think about 55-65 will more than likely go and they just haven't gotten around to sending us the RSVP and booking their stuff. But...if another 5-10 people decide last minute to go, we're SCREWED. That completely changes everything. Not to mention, we have a group contract for the resort rooms, our payments to the resort start in August, etc. If it were just as easy as saying, Oh well, if you can go great if you cant let us know than that's fine too whatever....then I wouldn't be sweating all of this. But, given all these little constraints (and all the other crap, like buying enough OOT bags & item to fill them with, favors, etc. which I dont want to waste extra $ on and then have to bother with trying to sell extras)...as you can imagine its VERY FRUSTRATING.
Honestly, I wish I could just call these people up and scream, "STOP BEING SUCH A F*ckin Flaker and just tell us yes or no!!!".
On another note, that really blows about your husban'ds family not even acknowledging or congratulating you guys on the wedding & marriage. That's extremely rude. And I would do the same thing when their special events and holidays roll around..give them the same treatment. I know people always want to say, "Oh don't stoop to their level and take the high road"...but you know what? Things like that are extremely hurtful, and I don't think people get it until they are treated the same way they treat others.