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family drama.... to invite or not to invite please help

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#1 TurTleA4613

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    Posted 28 February 2012 - 04:54 PM

    ill try and make a long story short my FI and i are having a DW in Jamaica. before we decided 100 %to have a DW  i had a family friend that i have known since i was 3 called me one day saying her and her husband wanted to give me $1000 for my dress but don't say anything yet because her husband didn't want her to tell me yet but she wanted to let me know..  So i was so excited that was one less thing we had to come up with money for . so once we announced  it would be in Jamaica the tone changed( from what i understand he is afraid to fly ) and i had heard from my mom that they no longer wanted to pay for it. so finally she approached me and said they no longer were going to pay for it. didn't give me any reason just that she shouldn't have told me and that there not (later i was told it was so they could help my sister husband and her 2 kids get to Jamaica .. that dos not surprise me they always favored my sister ) .. i don't think its right to take form one to give to another after you had already helped her with her wedding ) ... so since we where at a family party i didn't not make a big deal about it.. then a few days later i asked my sister (who had a DW herself ) if she new why and it turned in to a giant fight and she had posted something on facebook ( the root of all evil ) and exploded from there. my FI and Aunt got into it with my sister and then my mom saw it all and got involved. that ended my FI and aunt not talking to my mom and sister . and i only talk to them maybe once a week and don't get to see my niece and nephew as often as i use to and its very hurtful.. so my question is should we invite  this friend and her husband since they are what caused this blowout.. ( they wrote me a email saying they know we prob wont forgive them but want to make it right and go ..  so i guess he can over come his fear of flying)

    im torn on what to do be the bigger person and invite them ( i don't want to regret anything about our wedding) or not let them walk all over me and stick to not inviting them ..


    if you could just give me some advise it would be a great help




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    Posted 01 March 2012 - 04:49 AM

    ugh im sorry that i dont have any good advice, other than do what your heart tells you. you dont always have to be the bigger person, but sometimes you have to make the choice that is ultimately best for everyone involved even if its not your favorite choice.


    good luck!

    #3 Tia529

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    • 76 posts

      Posted 01 March 2012 - 08:10 AM

      I'm sorry!  This seems like a total mess.  It's hard to advise you what to do, since I don't know any of the people involved.  But, if it were me, I think the easiest thing to do would be to invite them to the wedding.  Then it's up to them whether or not they come and make amends.  Like Abbie said, sometimes you have to do what you don't want to do, because it's best for your family.  Whatever you decide, good luck!

      #4 Realcdngirl

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      • 177 posts

        Posted 05 March 2012 - 11:51 AM

        I say invite them. My FI's mother and step-father got very angry with us (still not sure why) and stated that they would not be attending the wedding but we still invited them. Let them make the decision, that way no-one will ever be able to hold it over your head in the future. Sorry for the family drama.

        #5 stella331

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        • 247 posts

          Posted 05 March 2012 - 05:55 PM

          I would invite them. I'm sure things will eventually smooth over and you might regret it if you don't invite them.
          46 booked and counting!

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