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My story is a bit of a long one, so I'll try not to get too carried away with details. 

 

I married my husband Matt in May of 2008 and we knew that we weren't planning on having kids right away.  We said we'd "talk about it" in a year.  Well, what do you know, but I ended up getting pregnant the weekend we went away for our 1st anniversary in 2009.  A few days later, I had some major cramping.  Like so bad it made me feel like I was hot and sweaty and might pass out.  After it continued for a few hours, I had a co-worker drive me and my mom to the ER (we work on a university/hospital campus).  They did an ultrasound and couldn't see anything, but confirmed the pregnancy via blood work.  By then, the cramping had stopped.  Since they weren't able to locate the sac, they wanted to continue to monitor me, so I went in every other day for blood work to make sure the pregnancy was progressing as it should.  Unfortunately, the blood work lied!  My blood hormones were doing everything that they should in a normal and healthy pregnancy, but when they gave me another ultrasound, they located the pregnancy in my left fallopian tube.  If they had caught it earlier, they could have dissolved it via a methaltrexate shot, but since there was already a heartbeat, I needed emergency surgery and ended up losing my tube. This was super depressing b/c I wasn't all that excited about the pregnancy at first since it was a surprise but had just gotten to the excited part and I thought all was well since my blood work was good and then I heard this.  Physical recovery was fine, I was sore for a week or so and had lingering back issues for a few months, but the emotional recovery...I'd say I'm still dealing with that.

 

As soon as we were medically approved, we began TTC and I started charting on Fertility Friend (FF).  Funny enough, once I started charting, it was obvious to me that when I had "accidentally" gotten pregnant previously, it was because I ovulate late in my cycle.  I had assumed I was normal and I O'd halfway through.  Anyway, since my fertility was decreased by 50% b/c of the loss of my left tube, after a few unsuccessful months, we went to a Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE).  We were with one office for almost a year and went through various medical and/or IUI cycles before I decided that I just wasn't happy there.  We had taken a few month break and were just starting back up with the doctors inn November of 2010.  I had an appt at practice #1 on 11/19 and decided I wouldn't be returning there, so went to practice #2 on 11/23 for an initial appt.  I found out on 11/26 that I was pregnant for the second time with no medical interventions.  It was definitely a surprise.  But I got the bad news on 12/06, on my 32nd birthday, that this pregnancy wasn't viable either and was most likely another ectopic but in my right tube.  We couldn't locate it on an ultrasound, so knowing my history, my doctor gave me the methaltrexate shot (in my ass cheeks, fun!) to dissolve before a heartbeat was able to be formed and I lose my remaining tube.  This was also very depressing b/c we had been trying so hard for so long and then to get that news on my birthday morning, I just felt like we were cursed.

 

As soon as AF returned, my doctor was very proactive about treatment and I had another surgery in February 2011 to remove polyps, some endo and verify that all was well with my right tube.  And we immediately started up IUI cycles and continued through until May.  In May, I experienced a very sad and unexpected tragic loss in my family, so we stepped away from TTC b/c my heart just wasn't in it.  Then I got my third surprise and unexpected BFP in August.  Of course we are super happy and I look at it as a gift from my lost brother.  I think this gift was given to us to lessen the pain of losing him.  Or to take away the focus of the grief.  We watched this pregnancy carefully and didn't announce until we were pretty sure it was safe.  In fact, I just made the announcement (besides my bosses) at work today!

 

We don't plan on finding out the sex at the next ultrasound, we think we will have them put it in an envelope and open it Christmas morning.  We were going to wait until the shower, but I decided it was something better shared with close family first.  Plus, this is the first set of holidays without my brother, so it's very difficult for my family and I think it might be good to have something positive to focus on Christmas morning rather then the sadness of who is missing.

 

We are due April 13, 2012 and I have an open mind about my "birth plan".  I like to think that I tend to the natural side of things, but I also watched my sister give birth to her youngest a few years ago and I was terrified.  I've since some to terms that we are all strong in different ways and just b/c she was natural doesn't mean I am weak if I chose an epidural.  I'm very excited to become a mom!  But also, super scared.

 

And I guess I'm not all that great at keeping stories short, am I....

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Hey Carly! I just wanted to say hi : )

 

I am about 14 weeks now, and I am nine days away from flying out. I would love to stay up even later to read all this and share a little about myself but wedding DIY projects are still calling. I really look forward to coming back and talking more as soon as I get back!!! Hope you are feeling good cheesy.gif

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Hi, girls!  I'm  not currently pregnant but have been (I have a 1 year old son) and wouldn't mind being again down the line.  Hope you don't mind me tagging along :)

 

Carly I'm so excited for you!  This pregnancy is so amazing.  I think keeping an open mind about your birth plan is wise.  We often think we know what we want until we are in a situation that tells us otherwise.

 

Mebonidie2be congratulations to you!  I hope your pregnancy is easy and you feel great on your wedding vacation!

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Originally Posted by meBonidie2be View Post

 

Hey Carly! I just wanted to say hi : )

 

I am about 14 weeks now, and I am nine days away from flying out. I would love to stay up even later to read all this and share a little about myself but wedding DIY projects are still calling. I really look forward to coming back and talking more as soon as I get back!!! Hope you are feeling good cheesy.gif

 

congrats!!  how have you been feeling?  

 

i hope you have a great time!

 

I'm not prego, nor do I ever plan to be again but I'm tagging along too.

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Hey ladies : )  Thank you.

 

I feel great. Not sick or anything at all. Maybe a little tired but ahhh I'll get over it. My Fi and I as well as 11 of friends and family members are leaving for Jamaica on Wednesday. I am sooooo excited! The pre-travel doc apt. went really well. We heard the heart beat loud and clear <3 The doc gave me a copy of all my records in case I should need them (let's hope not). Better safe than sorry.

 

I just had my final fitting and brought my dresses home. Looooooove them. I can't wait to be walking down the aisle toward my future husband. He is going to be a great father.

 

Well gotta get back to packing.....but i cant wait to come back and baby talk.

 

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...

Carly I just read your story and I am so happy for you after all you have been through. It must be hard losing your brother. I know how I would feel. Uggghhh I don't even want to think about it. It will be great for your family to have your forthcoming child to focus on. How have you been feeling? All check-ups good? Thanks for starting this thread!!!!

 

I am glad there are some "already moms" that want to tag along. I like advice. I hate advice sometimes, honestly. Yet, it is alot easier to accept on the computer rather than someone who wants to grab your arm and tell you how it will be. Ugghh, I am not really showing yet (I can tell for sure, most people can't) and I am already annoyed with how everyone wants to tell me how much my life is going to change. Oh really, I thought it would all still be the same. I would just take my baby to the bar, still go to concerts every week, go on last minute/spontaneous vacations. Right. Sorry, small rant.

 

ok... about me, my husband, and our little feet

 

I am 26. My husband is 39. We are due April 23rd. For both of us, this is our first child. We met November of 2010. I was managing a little cafe and he came in for lunch.When I came out of the bathroom he was the only person in the restaurant. He looked at me and his mouth literally dropped open. I instantly had butterflies in my stomach.love.gif

I told him that our first date felt like an interview for marriage (we were both very honest and open and I think that really propelled our relationship) He asked me to move in with him very shortly after and we were pretty much inseperable. He is the most thoughtful, truly kind person i have ever met in my life. He brings out the best in me for sure. I have always wanted to be a mom. I just wanted to wait until I was really ready. Well, together we felt ready.He went with me to have my IUD removed in March, and we had our preconception apt. in April. He proposed in May for our 6 month anniversary. I brought up the topic of going back on the pill until after the wedding...I got the puppy dog eyes. I just figured hey...I'll remember more of our wedding if I am sober. We found out we were pregnant August 21st. His response was "I'm sorry". haha I am so happy everything has happened the way it has though.

 

Carly, after reading your story and hearing other ladies stories..I know how blessed we are. When we started TTC I thought to myself "I have spent some much time on the pill and using dif contraceptives...What if I can't even get pregnant?"

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Yeah in person, sometimes advice can just sound so preachy. Like if that person didn't say it to me  I would have no clue. One of the many joys of pregnancy...especially for us first time mums.

 

Honestly, in part i feel bad sharing my story after yours. I just really hope all is going well for you. I want more details!!!!! When is your next doc apt.? Are you under any restrictions or anything? Is your pregancy considered high-risk?

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No, not high risk anymore.  It started out that way b/c of the past history of ectopics, but once all was confirmed well and implanted in the uterus, I was transferred to my regular midwife and everythings been great since.

 

We have our 20w ultrasound next Monday, it's a little late, but I wanted my husband to be there.  We're bringing our moms too, so they're super excited.  But Matt wants to wait until birth to find the sex out and I just can't wait that long.  So our current compromise is that we will not find out on Monday but have them write it down for us and we'll open it on Christmas morning and share with our families then too.  I'm kind of hoping that it'll bring some much needed joy to a day that is sure to be hard for all of us.

 

And my family shower is planned for 02/12, which all the sudden seems to close!  Our families are both really big, so we ended up having to cut all my friends from the list, which I'm really disappinted about, but what can you do.  Our final list after cuts was 93 so breaking off the 30ish friends made it much more manageable.

 

And don't worry about sharing yours after mine!  I certainly hope that's not why not that many others have chimed in.  I know my story is a rough one, but for some reason problems with infertility are hush-hush and I thought starting with mine would help others share.  I hadn't thought of it having the opposite effect.  I wish more people had stories like yours!

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