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I agree with Clgriffi also! I think that you shouldn't have to invite people that you don't know well, even if they are family. If your parents insist, they should pay. This is the beauty of destination weddings. You get to invite who you want, and throw a lot of custom to the wind.

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I'm afraid I agree with everyone else-  I would be really upset if I had to pay for my meal on top of the price I would pay to go to your wedding. For that price, I woudl definitely expect everything to be free!  For almost 5 grand a couple everything better be free!! I hope everything works out for you! Also, I would try to work something out with your resort, for that price and that the meal is not included? I bet if you asked they would cut you a deal. You never know unless you try.

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Yikes... I also agree with all of the above... :( So Sorry.. I actually had the same problem.. My mother telling me that I had to invite my Uncle to my wedding who maybe I had seen 10 times in my entire life and I am 26! My FI and I are paying for the wedding but my parents are also contributing.

 

I have come to the conclusion that I am NOT including or inviting my uncle or his family. I understand that is my mother's brother but if he cared about me getting married he would of been here through my life even if it was just on Holidays.. right??

 

On your other question... I WOULD NOT ask your guests to pay for their wedding dinner.. If you and your FI (and if anyone else is contributing) can't afford the meals at the wedding I would 100% try and cut back in other areas such as oot bags, rings, type of room your staying in, hair/makeup artists....

 

Would love to see how you worked this out!

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I can't believe your FI's family has no problem paying for their own food at a wedding....Like everyone else, I would be very offended and kind of mad if someone invited me to their wedding and then asked me to pay for my dinner....

 

I totally get the cost can get out of control, but like so many before have said, cut costs in other ways or narrow down your guest list.  No one likes to pay for people they don't really know, but unfortunately, sometimes it has to be done.  I hope you guys are are able to compromise and come up with a better solution.

 

 

Good Luck!!! 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Yep, I agree with everyone else.. I realise everyone is different but Ive never heard of anyone paying for their own wedding meal before, I would be offended.. I know where your coming from with inviting people your not that close too.. We're from the UK and getting married in mexico (which is an 11 hour flight) so we're lucky that everyone coming is very close to us.. Im over the moon 37 have booked to come so im trying to say thank you as much as I can by giving them a special reception etc..

 

Its a very tricky situation! I hope u sort it out.. This is the last thing any bride needs on top of the other bridal stress! Good Luck xxx

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I have to agree with the crowd (and sorry to echo the bunch but they are right)! From an etiquette point of view, it's the bride and groom's responsibility to pay for the guest's meals. It's a blessing that guests are spending money to attend your destination wedding, so you absolutely must pay for this and be so happy that people are joining you for your DW. Good luck!! 

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If you invite someone to a dinner, for a date, a wedding, etc... you are offering them that dinner.  It may not be a problem to your fiance's family, but it's rude to ask someone to pay for a meal you've invited them to.  If it is such a deal-breaker to you, consider having an earlier or later reception time so maybe you don't have a meal, but hors d'ouvres or something like that.

 

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