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#11 TammyWright

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Posted 17 August 2011 - 07:52 AM



Originally Posted by bmadzia1 

Although I don't think this is a right place for public arguement, I don't see why Cupcake cannot vent on this site. She did not mention names or even profile nicks.  I come here to vent too.... knowing that one of these people may or may not be on this site.  sometimes we do look for opinions or comments from 'outside'. whether it's a stranger online or at a coffee shop just to see if we're overreacting or rightly so being peed off ....



i agree....cupcake bride should be able to vent on BDW...but if your vent is about another BDW member, then don't be surprised if they respond...

 

::quietly backing out of this thread:: 


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#12 cupcake1382

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    Posted 17 August 2011 - 08:20 AM

    I see where you are coming from however her planning thread has nothing to do with her as a person. And maybe "friend" was a strong word to use. Rather an acquaintance through another friend who just happened to be planning weddings at the same time and we crossed paths years later. But also, you didn't read her 27 text messages ranting and and raving Jesus this Jesus that trying to force something on me I may not be ready to deal with right now. And no I don't owe her anything after her basically calling me out on FB and calling me an atheist. I even asked her to agree to disagree and just leave it alone. So yes, you didn't know but I tried my best to avoid the convo in all aspects. I have lots of friends and we are all different and there is some stuff we just don't talk about. So yes my defenses were up when I felt attacked. I did apologize for not coming to her because I did see her point that I could have, but once she called me an atheist I basically stooped down to her level and was upset and allowed it to bother me. I stepped up and stopped being childish and apologized but it wasn't reciprocated so all I can do is move on. Also, try not to be so naive and think everyone who is so friendly on here is like that when they get from behind the screen. Toootally different person than a planning thread. If anyone has a problem with my venting maybe there shouldn't be a venting forum.. Especially since I called no one out, she opened that door herself.

    cupcake,

     

    YOU'RE RIGHT THIS IS A PLACE TO  VENT AND YES YOU HAVE A RIGHT TO FEEL THE WAY YOU FEEL BUT I CAN UNDERSTAND THE OTHER BRIDE'S POINT.

     

    WHY PUT YOUR FEELINGS ON SUCH A PUBLIC FORUM...IS IT REALLY THAT SERIOUS?

     

    I'VE VIEWED THE OTHER BRIDE'S PLANNING THREAD AND SEEN MANY OF HER POSTS..SHE DOESN'T SEEM TO BE AN INCONSIDERATE OR IGNORANT PERSON, OR EVEN AN OUTRAGEOUSLY RUDE INDIVIDUAL..RATHER YOUR POST SOUNDS INCREDIBLY COMBATIVE AND OFFENSIVE.

     

    WHY NOT JUST TALK OFFLINE...I MEAN, IF SHE WAS REALLY A FRIEND DIDN'T YOU OWE HER THAT?  SOMETIMES WHEN YOU READ THINGS RATHER THAN SAY THINGS, IT CAN BE TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT..I JUST KNOW THAT IF IT WERE ME AND I THOUGHT SOMEONE WAS A FRIEND I WOULDN'T HAVE CHOSEN TO AIR OR VENT MY FRUSTRATIONS ONLINE.  ESPECIALLY WHEN I KNOW THAT PERSON IS ON THE SAME SITE.  HOW COULD SHE NOT BE OFFENDED OR FEEL LIKE SHE HAD TO PROTECT OR DEFEND HERSELF AND HER ACTIONS.  I MEAN, WHAT YOU'RE SAYING ABOUT SOMEONE'S FAITH, GIRL, THOSE ARE FIGHTING WORDS.  ISN'T THAT WHY WE WERE TAUGHT NOT TALK TO POLITICS OR RELIGION AND SOMETIMES SPORTS??? LOL!

     

    IT SOUNDS TO ME LIKE SHE'S BEING TRUE TO HERSELF AND YOU TO YOURSELF BUT ON THIS FORUM YOU LOOK LIKE SOMEONE WHO IS REALLY TAKING THIS ENTIRE SITUATION TO A WHOLE OTHER (IMMATURE) LEVEL.

     

    I WONDER IF IN YOUR DIGRESSION, YOU MIGHT TAKE A HARD LONG LOOK AT YOURSELF AND ASK THE QUESTION?  WHY DID I REALLY NEED TO VENT PUBLICLY INSTEAD OF TRYING TO RESOLVE THE ISSUE PRIVATELY...I MEAN, CAN'T WE ALL JUST GET ALONG??

     

    I'M JUST SAYING!

     

     


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    #13 AfricanVenus

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      Posted 17 August 2011 - 08:37 AM

      @ cupcake and mrstgunn: What in the world is this even all about? First of all, the vent made absolutely no sense. I wasn't able to figure out what was going on until mrstgunn responded in all honesty. Second, this should be between the two of you. If you can't talk it out, then move on. I honestly cannot figure out what the problem is. Cupcake's mad because she allegedly said your non-denominational ceremony was doomed? Or because she allegedly called you an atheist? Or Cupcake allegedly said mrstgunn's beliefs were offensive? If either of you did these things, how does that change the price of cheese in China? I'm not trying to be facetious. I just don't know what was supposed to be the point of your vents. Cupcake, either tell her you'd like to still be "acquaintances", but her comments on religion are quite hurtful for you and if she could mellow out or stop talking to her. Period.

       

      I personally don't mind vents IF they are constructive (i.e. looking for advice, help, etc). What I don't understand are vents to just vent. The problem is that they're one-sided. It does come across as an attempt to get others to agree with you. We never hear the other person(s) side so we can objectively tell you, "You know what? She was wrong for that, but you were wrong also." We all just clamor and say, "Oh, sucks you're going through that! And those people suck!" and we really don't know the other side. What is the point really? Are you trying to solve the problem, or get sympathy? If you're above immaturity, then TALK to each other like two grown women and human beings. Don't bring your issues on a public forum. I know there's freedom to vent, hence the thread, but just because it exists doesn't mean you have to use it. Some things just don't have to be dignified with a response. I pray you ladies work it out and move on.


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      #14 kymish

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        Posted 08 September 2011 - 11:55 AM

        LOL... well i did not expect this when i was reading venting forums today.. hope you ladies worked it out !






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