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Bridesmaid expectations

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15 replies to this topic

#11 acireta

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    Posted 15 February 2011 - 11:53 AM

    No way about looking like we had a no-show! Those are our best friends, and if that's just how many there are, that's ok!! Bunch together for pics, instead of standing in a line and it'll look great!!


    I'm so glad you were able to make the group rate, that's awesome! For you and for the extra friends who got to partake in the discounted rate!



    P.S. assmonkey is such a great term. One of my coworkers is a MAJOR assmonkey today and it has nothing to do with a wedding.

    Erica & Al - April 3, 2012 - St. Thomas, USVI

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    #12 Meggers7484

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      Posted 15 February 2011 - 12:02 PM

      Pinky, I'm not too worried about it. I was for a while but part of having a destination wedding is dealing with the stress of whether or not people can make it. I actually meant GM's not BM's - my lovely bm's booked months ago. It's FI's stupid buddies that are holding out. My philosophy is - the people that matter will be there. They will find a way and I have enough on my plate without having to worry about their issues.


      Our resort actually did sell out. There are two other lower end resorts on our property that the stragglers will have to book at, even though if you're staying at the lower resorts you aren't allowed at the higher one with the rest of us. So they've pretty much screwed themselves already and will now be spending their time at the crappier resorts by themselves. But again, we warned them and it's not our problem!! If I sound harsh it isn't because I don't recognize the sacrifice of time and money everyone is making, because I really, truly do. But our wedding is 63 days away and some people still haven't booked, knowing full well it stresses us out. If it were me, I would never put my friends (and myself!) through that worry over the small chance I'll save a couple hundred bucks.

      #13 Meggers7484

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        Posted 15 February 2011 - 12:05 PM

        Oh and our group is close enough that everyone knows who was asked to stand in the wedding. I actually had on gf get really offended that I didn't ask her and she would have even up the party but I am just not about filler. I asked the people who I knew should be up there with me, and no one extra.

        #14 Avens

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          Posted 17 February 2011 - 04:57 PM

          I have a similar issue.  One of my bridesmaids is a teacher, but might not have her current contract renewed (so I'm assuming she's not coming, but won't know until summer), and the other was a student and then unemployed for a while - so she isn't sure if she could make it (and was very up front about that).


          The other two have booked already, so I'm not worried about them.  I have another friend whom I would definately ask if I was having 5, and she's already put down her deposit - so I'm wondering if I should so I have 3 or 4, then I may end up with 5.  Haha. 


          The FI thinks we need matching sides, I don't really care though.  So I'm kind of waiting before I officially ask people.

          #15 WedFashion

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            Posted 18 February 2011 - 08:07 AM

            The most important thing in my opinion is communication. There are no golden rules what a bridesmaid should do and even if they were you would be in tears if you should be an exception. Have a good conversation about what they expect from you and both are happy :)

            #16 pinkybebe

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              Posted 18 February 2011 - 04:15 PM

              Hi everyone!


              Man, what a week I'm so glad it's FRIDAY...yippee!


              Lindsey - yeah I ass monkey is an awesome term...another good one is ass clown LOL. Unfortunately, I did give the wedding party a deadline but my one BM absolutely thinks she can get a better price last minute. For me I can't take that risk cuz i'm booking a wedding. That's why I was so stressed out...I was worried she might not be able to find a last minute deal. At this point i don't care anymore. I think I might just find a back up BM or just leave it un even with 1 BM and 2 Groomsmen.


              Acireta -  yeah i guess you're right...bunching together for pics will look better than standing in a line...but it really sucks that there is only 1 BM and 2 GMs. I'm soooo glad i got the group rate... I guess when it comes down to it your GOOD friends always pull through for you. :)

              Hahah at least it's the weekend you don't have to worry about your assmonkey coworker :)


              Meggers - Yah you're lucky you have loyal BMs....Funny enough the GMs are all booked with us so it's only that one BM i had to worry about. I heard about other ppl having issues with the resort being completely booked too!

              I don't think you sound too harsh at all I mean if those people are that inconsiderate of other ppl's weddings then yeah they deserve to be staying in the lower hotel by themselves! I'm like you, I would never put my friends in that kind of stress by trying to book last minute just to "maybe" save a couple hundred bucks! Are you having yours at the Royal? I heard some of the weeks have already been sold out!


              Avens - Well at least your BM who's the teach told you well in advance about her situation. Unfortunately, mine just told me when we were close to booking the trip. :(  I agree with the other girls above that having an uneven wedding party is okay cuz you have like 3 or 4 already. I just still think it's weird if i only have 1 BM and 2 GM. So you should be okay.


              WedFashion - Yeah it was my bad to thinkg that the whole wedding party would cooperate and book when we booked. I did later on communicate with this BM but she still insisted that she could find a cheaper and better deal. Whatever! At this point I don't care if she comes anymore. I hate stressing about this one BM.




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