Invitations, STDs, and a heck of a lot of guilt, help :(

[shan0487]

I think it just depends on your budget, if you can afford to send out STD/invitations to everyone you would if you were getting married at home, then do! (Like the other ladies said, check out vistaprint!!!)  That way no one is left out and they can all feel appreciated regardless of whether they decide to come or not!

[tross84]

I totally understand you guilt but in the end it is your day

[subbi]

I totally understand how you feel. Since the day i mentioned Destination Wedding, it like i killed my neighbour`s cat. every nite i prime myself for a phone call discouraging us from have a DW. But at the end of the day isn`t this suppose to be about us. Besides everyone gets to enjoy a vacation, as I said they`re not the only one spending the money we are still spending money to Have the dinners and everything. Just the other day i had to get snipping and told someone even if there`s only FI and I we are having a destination wedding. and we not changing it, and I feel really great about my decision. 

[traceysteve]

I expected a lot of negativity towards the destination wedding also, but surprisingly, a lot of people seem on board...even my 89 year old grandmother!! I know the excitement of Aruba helps. We are not expecting any presents, and I'm even on the fence about a shower. I think we may lean towards a Jack and Jill to help raise some cash before we go, but that's all we want people to contribute (and their trip, of course) I think wording is touchy, and I agree, that no matter what you do and how careful you are to not offend people, it is bound to happen. The bottom line is...who cares..you're getting married!!

 

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[mandys]

Do not feel guilty. This is your day. It is starting to feel like weddings are being done for the guests and not the bride and groom. This is your dream wedding. Not anyone else's and it is absolutely not fair of people to make you feel uncomfortable with your choices and decisions. I wouldnt worry too much about all the wording you want to put in your invites/stds about understanding if people cant go etc etc. Its an invitation and thats it. If they want to share in your day they will.

[harkatea]

I think any mention of gifts may be a bit touchy for some people.  But I do think people understand that you want them to be a part of the process but understand if people cannot go.

[hatfiehm]

So glad I came accross this thread!  I too have been a bit upset by the negative reactions, and just peoples willingness to share their opinion of your choice!  (trust me I didn't ask!!)  I am doing my best to toughen up, and not let them get to me.  For the most part, everyone is excited, but my mom in particular questions our choice nearly every time I speak to her.  I want her to be involved, I am her only daughter. but she is driving me nuts!!  Stay strong sister!   The wording that you girls included above for STDs and Websites is really helpful, I will be taking your advice for sure.

 

Thanks ladies!

Holly

[aaronlori]

I completely understand how you are feeling, I'm sure many destination brides do. I know people think we are 'selfish' but I think it's selfish for people to be upset that you are not having the wedding they want. What was I supposed to do, plan a wedding to please everyone else? Actually, that was what I did for nearly ten months until FI and I decided we had enough called off the traditional wedding and planned the wedding of our dreams. We sent out an email and have a website explaining our decision. We even said within both that we knew this decision meant there would be many people who could not make it and for that we were sorry. As for the gift thing we haven't said anything, where we are from people only give gifts if they attend the wedding. We've been telling anyone who have asked, and are booked to go, that we would rather them put the amount they would have spent on a gift toward their trip.