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some people are so self-absorbed

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#1 starchild



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    Posted 22 August 2007 - 12:24 PM

    Will and I have a mutual friend that is in and out of our lives, but since we've known him for 7 years we wanted to invite him to the wedding. He didn't reply to emails/voicemails about getting his address to send the std so we took him off the list. I found out from another friend that this guy mentioned we were getting married so clearly he got our messages and never replied.

    Flash forward 8 months, I get this friend request on myspace from a band I don't know so I deny it. Then I get a message from the band written by our "friend" saying it's him, accept the request. I do. I get another message from him - not saying congrats or sorry I never got back to you, but saying this:

    "How you doing fam? Just wanted to stop by and check you out. As fellow spacers, we wanted to know if you could give us 60 seconds of your time to stop by our page, listen to our music and tell us what you think. We put a lot of our soul into our music so thanks in advance for stopping by and dropping a comment. Don't forget to sign the guest book and leave us a voice comment so we can hear what you're all about. Hope your day is going good and we look forward to meeting with you."

    WTF? We could have used 60 seconds of his time to call us back last year. We put a lot of our soul into our wedding, does he care? And he doesn't look forward to meeting with us or he would have by now.

    Isn't it just a little wrong to send me this generic marketing ploy without first even attempting to redeem himself? So selfish.

    #2 StephanieMN

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      Posted 22 August 2007 - 12:34 PM

      It does seem a bit cowardly. Maybe he is testing the waters to see how you feel about him.

      #3 jak27

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        Posted 22 August 2007 - 12:37 PM

        I would not be amused. Especially after receiving what is obvioulsy a cut & paste marketing blip aimed at probably everyone he knows. I don't know anything about myspace, but I guess Deny it all!

        #4 MikkiStreak

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          Posted 22 August 2007 - 01:51 PM

          That sounds like a generic band solicitation that goes out to every person who accepts them as a friend. Have you heard anything else from him? I don't know how much time has passed since you got the message, but maybe he'll follow up with something more personal to you and Will?

          If not, yea, he's a selfish schmuck. I know a lot of people like this- and gotta admit, I'm a pretty selfish person myself.... I'd give him a couple days to follow up with something more personal and if he doesn't, I'd probably call him to the carpet on the fact that he hasn't bothered to make any type of personal contact with you after he was specifically asking you to make effort and accept his invite. I don't know if I'd mention his lack of interest in the wedding tho at first, because he'll just turn around and in his mind think you're the one wanting all the attention....

          #5 NYJen

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            Posted 22 August 2007 - 02:05 PM

            I'm not sure how good of a friend he was, but at this point, if it's not worth it to you to remain friends with him, I wouldn't respond to any of his emails, phone calls or anything. I'm not familiar with Myspace, is there a space to leave a note, comment or email? If so, don't say anything. Let him see that you haven't commented and let him come to you and address your requests first. Since you tried repeatedly to contact him about his address, I would wait until he replies to you. Maybe I'm being petty, but I too am sick of people like this. Sometimes I feel like they need a little taste of their own medicine to see how it feels.

            #6 royfa

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              Posted 22 August 2007 - 02:14 PM

              How rude is that!!!
              Fannie & Pierre

              #7 rodent


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                Posted 22 August 2007 - 02:24 PM

                That would annoy me. I can't stand when people don't have the time to RSVP to stuff. I send out evites a lot & you can see when people look at the evite. Some people will look at it twice & not bother to take the seconds to RSVP. Then if you ask them, they say they must not have gotten the email, have been really busy or some other lame excuse.

                I mean the stamp is already on the thing. RSVP!!!

                I have my myspace set up to not allow bands to request being my friend. It's just a lot of solicitors.

                #8 PaulaV

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                  Posted 22 August 2007 - 03:48 PM

                  Yeah, sounds like a generic email he sends...
                  Ask him why he never responded to your wedding emails and phone calls?
                  That makes me angry.

                  #9 Lizzy

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                    Posted 22 August 2007 - 05:30 PM

                    I think I would tell him I am insulted that he would use our friendship this way. I would also say that I should have known how little our friendship meant when he ignored our wedding, but now I know. Then I would take him off my friends list and bann him from the site.
                    End of story!
                    For the dance, at the reception, Maggie wore her crinoline and a lovely lace top. Looks like Tadd likes it!

                    Professional Photography by Michael B.www.michaelbstudio.comMinneapolis, MN

                    #10 JaimeLynne

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                      Posted 22 August 2007 - 05:35 PM

                      That is weird. Is it possible another member of the band sent you that message? That just sounds out of place - if he meant to do that, I don't get it. I'd be pretty P.O.'ed as well.

                      ~ Jaime & Martin ~
                      "Rain or Swine! 2-0-0-9"

                      We had 24 people attend our wedding in Las Caletas, Mexico on May 24th, 2009!

                      We all stayed at The Marriott in P.V., and Honeymooned at The Royal Plantation in Ochos Rios, Jamaica!

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