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No biological father available to walk down the aisle


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#1 karyan

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    Posted 10 December 2010 - 04:30 AM

    Hello!

     

    I have a sticky situation, where my biological father is not involved in my life nor is he invited to my wedding. I have 3 wonderful uncles in my life, as well as a very caring "step dad" who's been around since I've been 17 yrs old (I'm now 29). My problem is I don't know who to get to walk me down the aisle :S

     

    I'm not overly close with my step-dad, but he doesn't have any daughters and always tells me that I'm the daughter he never had......he will be crushed if I don't include him some way, but I really don't want him to walk me down the aisle (prob #1)

     

    Of my 3 uncles, all seem to be coming to the DW, and all would gladly step in to walk me down (prob #2). The problem is choosing.....I don't want to choose one and have the others upset about not being included. Of the 3 uncles, I have my biological dad's older brother, my mom's brother, and my aunt's (on my Dad's side) husband (uncle by marriage). I'm closer to the latter two uncles, but the most appropriate choice (to me) seems to be my dad's brother (who I'm very fond of, but not as close to).

     

    I realize I could walk down the aisle with my Mom (whom I'm very close too) but I'd prefer for it to be a male family member. I also have my brother but he's a big wanker so I'd rather go alone then with him!! (sad but true)

     

    I'm just wondering if there's any etiquette or if anyone has had a similar problem?

     

    One solution I came up with is:

     

    My mom's brother walks me down the aisle

     

    My uncle by marriage does a reading/MC's reception (he's an excellent speaker)

     

    My step-dad does father of the bride speech and/or father daughter dance (I think this is the best solution for my step-dad)

     

    But then another uncle is excluded...... bah! THIS IS TOO HARD!!!!

     

    Any advice/opinions totally welcome!!! :)

     



    #2 clgriffi7

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      Posted 10 December 2010 - 05:02 AM

      In your position, I would probably have my mother walk me down the aisle as that would prevent any of the men from getting upset.  Then I would do the father/daughter dance with step-father.  I would think the uncles would all understand not having as big of a part in the wedding if you were to explain the pedicament you are in (in terms of including them all), whereas your step-dad might get his feelings hurt.  Just my opinion.  Good luck with your decision.  I think the biggest thing is to explain your dilema so that everyone understands you are being put in a tough spot. 



      #3 bmadzia1

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        Posted 10 December 2010 - 06:32 AM

        Why do you have to have anyone walk you down the aisle?  I had a friend in a similar situation, and she opted for walking down on her own.  She didn't hurt anyone by choosing someone other.... she did her dance with her step dad. 

         

        But if you really want someone to walk you down the aisle (male), I think you should decide between your mom and brother.  Leave the uncles out. 

         

        Good luck with your decision.



        #4 karyan

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          Posted 10 December 2010 - 12:05 PM

          Thanks for the advice ladies! Will consider all my options :)



          #5 islandbride8

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            Posted 10 December 2010 - 12:30 PM

            Sticking with the solution you came up with: can you have ur uncle by marriage MC the reception and the other one do a reading at the wedding?  I'm sure whatever you decide, no one will get upset.  It's your day and they all love you very much.  good luck



            #6 LisaMatterni

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              Posted 13 December 2010 - 08:05 AM



              Originally Posted by bmadzia1 

              Why do you have to have anyone walk you down the aisle?  I had a friend in a similar situation, and she opted for walking down on her own.  She didn't hurt anyone by choosing someone other.... she did her dance with her step dad. 

               

              But if you really want someone to walk you down the aisle (male), I think you should decide between your mom and brother.  Leave the uncles out. 

               

              Good luck with your decision.


              I agree. For sure, everyone will understand your situation. You've been so confused whom to choose and not. Just choose the very nearest family male member or just walk down the aisle alone.






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