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A Wedding without Bridesmaids or Groomsmen?


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#61 Jennkn87

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Posted 05 October 2013 - 08:57 PM

For the girls going the route of no wedding party- Have you thought about things like speeches? Will you still have anyone speak at your dinner? Who will bring the rings? I am still undecided if I want our family (brothers and sisters) to stand up or not. I want to save them money as well...so I'm thinking I wold purchase the attire for them since they are already paying for the trip. Any suggestions on this? I sort of just want to say oh well and just the two of us stand up front, no speeches, totally untraditional, which is fine by me!!



#62 kaleighMCL

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    Posted 06 October 2013 - 07:10 AM

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by Jennkn87 
     

    For the girls going the route of no wedding party- Have you thought about things like speeches? Will you still have anyone speak at your dinner? Who will bring the rings? I am still undecided if I want our family (brothers and sisters) to stand up or not. I want to save them money as well...so I'm thinking I wold purchase the attire for them since they are already paying for the trip. Any suggestions on this? I sort of just want to say oh well and just the two of us stand up front, no speeches, totally untraditional, which is fine by me!!

     

    Since we planned on only having a MOH and BM (no ring bearer) i bought a ring holder on esty, and i was going to have my FI's Brother hold onto it until right before the ceremony and then put them up on the table where we sign our lives away (hee hee). The speeches were optional, the FI and I were going to do thank you's to the family for coming and the mic would be open for everyone else. 

     

    For the $$ aspect, i told them i would give them (BM &MOH) 500 bucks to compensate them for the cost of being in the bridal party (or two nights stay on us was how i ended up wording it) i figured with the stags and showers plus attire and travel they would be spending about 500 extra on our wedding...BUT after having both of them bail on us we have to revise the ceremony - i'm not sure how to do the signing of stuff and speeches after. I'm just getting the FI and I in order and the rest is optional for the guests. I'm telling the parents the plan so they know they won't be called upon unless they want to be. We also aren't having a huge dance party (no dj) because none of us are huge dancers so right there we are going a little untraditional...

     

    Hope that helps! :) happy planning!



    #63 ironman

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      Posted 06 October 2013 - 03:10 PM

      Quote:
      Originally Posted by Jennkn87 
       

      For the girls going the route of no wedding party- Have you thought about things like speeches? Will you still have anyone speak at your dinner? Who will bring the rings? I am still undecided if I want our family (brothers and sisters) to stand up or not. I want to save them money as well...so I'm thinking I wold purchase the attire for them since they are already paying for the trip. Any suggestions on this? I sort of just want to say oh well and just the two of us stand up front, no speeches, totally untraditional, which is fine by me!!

       

      We're going to have our parents each give a speech, as well as us to give a speech to them/everyone. We also have good friends attending, and we might ask some of them to give a toast to the bride and to the groom (still undecided!). It's less the cost I am worried about by having no wedding party though - it's that none of my fianc©s really good friends will be attending. There are a few girls on my side I could ask, but I don't want to have someone and him to not.



      #64 Jennkn87

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      Posted 06 October 2013 - 03:41 PM

      We're going to have our parents each give a speech, as well as us to give a speech to them/everyone. We also have good friends attending, and we might ask some of them to give a toast to the bride and to the groom (still undecided!). It's less the cost I am worried about by having no wedding party though - it's that none of my fianc©s really good friends will be attending. There are a few girls on my side I could ask, but I don't want to have someone and him to not.

      Having the parents speak is a really good idea! I hadn't thought about that! We have asked our closest friends to attend. I had already told them previously I was not having a bridal party per say. I am happy with them coming for the big day, no sense in having them spend the extra money, ect. To be "in" the wedding as well!

      #65 Sehausle

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        Posted 07 October 2013 - 06:08 AM

        Quote:
        Originally Posted by Jennkn87 
         

        For the girls going the route of no wedding party- Have you thought about things like speeches? Will you still have anyone speak at your dinner? Who will bring the rings? I am still undecided if I want our family (brothers and sisters) to stand up or not. I want to save them money as well...so I'm thinking I wold purchase the attire for them since they are already paying for the trip. Any suggestions on this? I sort of just want to say oh well and just the two of us stand up front, no speeches, totally untraditional, which is fine by me!!

        My mom is standing up with me so she will carry my bouqet during the ceremony and my fiances dad is standing with him so he will carry the rings.


        As far as speeches, we asked our dads to give a speech at our cocktail hour during the champagne toast. Whoever else wants to say a few words can during our reception because it's one long table (we have a smaller group of 21) so it will be quite intimate.

         

        We wrote our parents really nice personal hand-written letters and bought them each a little thank you (for one we took them to a nice brunch and to an event in our home-town Charlotte for the other we are taking them on an Tulum Ruins excursion while we are in Mexico). The only other gifts were for the grooms sister who hosted our legal magistrate ceremony ( we bought her a $100 visa giftcard) and my friend who hosted my bachelorette (I bought her a $50 bottle of very nice wine). We ended up saving from not doing a traditional bridal party (though that is not the reason I decided not to have one). In the end we will have everything special we could want without spending an arm and a leg!



        #66 Jennkn87

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        Posted 07 October 2013 - 09:16 PM

        Quote:
        Originally Posted by Sehausle 
         

        My mom is standing up with me so she will carry my bouqet during the ceremony and my fiances dad is standing with him so he will carry the rings.


        As far as speeches, we asked our dads to give a speech at our cocktail hour during the champagne toast. Whoever else wants to say a few words can during our reception because it's one long table (we have a smaller group of 21) so it will be quite intimate.

         

        We wrote our parents really nice personal hand-written letters and bought them each a little thank you (for one we took them to a nice brunch and to an event in our home-town Charlotte for the other we are taking them on an Tulum Ruins excursion while we are in Mexico). The only other gifts were for the grooms sister who hosted our legal magistrate ceremony ( we bought her a $100 visa giftcard) and my friend who hosted my bachelorette (I bought her a $50 bottle of very nice wine). We ended up saving from not doing a traditional bridal party (though that is not the reason I decided not to have one). In the end we will have everything special we could want without spending an arm and a leg!

         

        Your right, I was just talking to a friend today about how much it is going to save us, AND them not having a bridal party. I would love for my close friends to be there, which right now they will be. I do not want to expect people to pay the money, even more so for expensive dresses on top of other things. I'm more and more certain I made the right decision on not having a wedding party everyday! So much less DRAMA and STRESS! (HOPEFULLY!)



        #67 RandL2015

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        Posted 07 October 2013 - 11:54 PM

        I'm also only having a MOH and BM as the wedding party. No bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girl or ring bearer. I think my friends are relived NOT to be bridesmaids. :D

        #68 Jennkn87

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        Posted 08 October 2013 - 12:16 AM

        Quote:
        Originally Posted by RandL2015 

        I'm also only having a MOH and BM as the wedding party. No bridesmaids, groomsmen, flower girl or ring bearer. I think my friends are relived NOT to be bridesmaids.

         

        What made you choose Jamaica and the Secrets chain?....Just in case I need to look elsewhere! I'm worrying myself a bit! LOL 



        #69 RandL2015

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        Posted 09 October 2013 - 03:50 PM

        c

        What made you choose Jamaica and the Secrets chain?....Just in case I need to look elsewhere! I'm worrying myself a bit! LOL 

        We LOVE Jamaica. We have been there twice already. It just feels so relaxing and welcoming. I did a girlfriend trip to the Secrets in Cancun this year and we had a FABULOUS time. Unlimited Luxury is exactly what you experience. In addition, my TA Babs, and other brides who have had their wedding at Secrets Wild Orchid, absolutely LOVE this resort. Needless to say, already reserved my date. :cheer2:

        #70 loquaciouspunky

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        Posted 01 January 2014 - 06:07 AM

        No bridal party here either. Instead of spending money on dresses etc, i just want them to come to the wedding! :)






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