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Guy ONLY Outing??

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#1 SDSteph

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    Posted 19 July 2010 - 07:38 PM

    So my FI mentioned a guy's outing and for some reason I didn't like the idea. We discussed it and he said its not that big of deal but now I feel bad.

    I want our wedding trip to be everthing both of us ever wanted not only what I want.

    We are only going to be in Mexico with our friends and family for 3 days and I feel we shouldn't try and leave anyone out.

    I mentioned that if he want to fly home (NY) for a weekend before the wedding to hang out with all of the guys or if he wants to have a bachelor party....to do that.... but I don't feel as if an 'all guy' outing should be something that is part of our wedding weekend. I want him to have fun and go to strip clubs and party but not while we have asked everyone to come visit us for our wedding.

    I feel as if I am being selfish, because I don't think I would really enjoy just hanging out with all of the girls. (not a girly spa kind of girl...I would rather be playing golf and drinking tequila) But I know how guys need their 'guy time'

    My FI is so great...because he said thats fine baby! But now I feel as if I am being stupid.

    I love all of my friends and family and want to just hang with everyone.

    Steph and Kel Mayan Riveria - February 2011http://www.stephnkelwedding.com

    #2 Canadiansandy

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      Posted 19 July 2010 - 08:24 PM

      Steph - Personally, I would feel the same as you. If it was a week-long trip, I don't think I'd have a problem with a guy outing. But for 3 days? There's prob already a lot going on, and you'd want to get as much time with friends and family as possible when down there. I don't think you're being stupid at all! I actually think it's really great that you told your FI how you felt about it and that he was so understanding. I think a guys' weekend before the wedding is a great idea - in fact that's what my FI is planning to do! :)
      Sandy & Aaron ~ May 4, 2011 ~ Dreams Palm Beach, Punta Cana ------ Bride & Groom + 30 booked! (and counting)

      #3 Thomasjsgirl

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        Posted 19 July 2010 - 08:28 PM

        If you guys were there for a whole week, this would probably be a non-issue, but, 3 days is not a lot of time. I think your suggestion to do something back home instead is a good one. And, if your FI is OK with that, then don't beat yourself up over it!
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        #4 OceanWonderland

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          Posted 19 July 2010 - 09:06 PM

          The men are all having an outing during our wedding weekend as well, but I think they are doing it in the least time-consuming way.
          My dad and uncle are renting a boat to go fishing/drinking from 7am-1pm and inviting all the boys in the group. So while the boys are out on the ocean doing whatever they do, us girls can enjoy a lazy, slow breakfast, and drinking mimosas by the pool. By the time they get back, we'll be ready for lunch and maybe they can grill up some of the fish the boys caught! Us girls might even do some souvenir shopping that morning since the men don't usually want to be involved in that aspect anyways. Then we have the rest of the trip together as a group.
          The only thing that sucks is my fiance won't get to meet with the wedding coordinator since he'll be on a boat, but it's not like he really cares about the small wedding details. It's kind of bothersome because I've already had to plan the entire wedding and now I'm gonna be in charge of the final meeting as well...but in all honestly, it's probably a lot easier being the sole person in charge. He only tells me when he doesn't like something. Anyways, maybe a half day outing can be the boys outing (like ziplining or fishing trip...).
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          #5 Girasole

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            Posted 20 July 2010 - 09:17 AM

            My husband and the "guys" went on a fishing excursion the day before our wedding. The rules were...you must be back by 1:30 so you can get ready for photos and reherseal. They left @ 7 and got back at 1. It also left me to spend time with the "girls" by going shopping, lounging at the beach & going to the spa for hair/makeup.
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            #6 vlynnw

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              Posted 20 July 2010 - 09:21 AM

              I guess I'm kind of torn on this situation. I think it's great for the guys to have an outing on their own. The day before the wedding my FI and the guys are doing their own thing while I take the girls and do something else. I guess though if you're only there for 3 days then you don't have quite as much time to do things all together so maybe there can be a compromise of a set block of time that he could hang with the guys and you could be with the girls?
              Veronica & Adam - May 6, 2011 - Dreams Tulum

              #7 clgriffi7

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                Posted 20 July 2010 - 10:00 AM

                Depending on what time of day your ceremony is, how would you feel about the guys going out for a round of golf while you are getting your hair and makeup done?

                I will be in Mexico for a full week (so it obviously a different situation) and our plans are roughly as follows:
                day 1: bride and groom arrive
                day 2: guests arrive, welcome cocktail hour and then guys night out (not a repeat of the bachelor party, but more innocent bartime) and girls night out
                day 3: day before the ceremony (excursion for whole group if we can afford to spring for it)
                day 4: wedding day - guys play a round of golf while ladies get nails, hair, makup done for a start time between 4 to 5 pm.


                #8 TammyWright


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                Posted 20 July 2010 - 11:34 AM

                my husband had a guys outting, actually they had a few...i just asked that it was early in the morning (most fishing trips start really early, or they can golf or surf early)...and made it a point to be social with everyone else when he was back. i didn't mind eatting breakfast with just my family and friends one morning.

                it worked out great...he was happy, i was happy he was being really social.

                it is his dream trip as well...are you going to feel guilty later on if you do not allow him to have a guys outting?

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                #9 Andi


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                  Posted 20 July 2010 - 11:40 AM

                  My hubby had a guys only fishing trip one day too and I was fine with it. Most of our guests only joined us for an extended 3 day weekend as well. While they were fishing I spent time with everyone else and barely even noticed he was gone! They fully enjoyed their time as did I, I really don't see a big deal in the "guys" doing something for just half a day if that is what they want to do. Besides there will be so many friends/family there with you, it won't be like your FI is leaving you all alone.

                  #10 SDSteph

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                    Posted 20 July 2010 - 04:12 PM

                    I don't think i would mind a day excursion trip on the wedding day.........I guess I just always pictured (i might need to get the pictures out of my head) us hving breakfast with our family on our wedding day. We have a late wedding (5pm) so were not doing the traditional not seeing each other on the day thing. My only hesitation.....is that we are all BIG drinkers. We go big and go home. A morning fishing trip might not be too bad but a tequila distillary on our wedding day doesn't sound great to me.
                    Steph and Kel Mayan Riveria - February 2011http://www.stephnkelwedding.com

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