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am i being unreasonable?

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#41 ~Nicole~

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    Posted 20 July 2010 - 12:25 PM

    Ditto to Rachel again. Seriously you're taking the thoughts right out of my head

    Friends of mine used our wedding as their honeymoon because they couldn't afford to both since our weddings were within 6 months. So they were celebrating their wedding as well. I think it would have been pretty bridezilla of me to say "you can't show any signs that you're celebrating your marriage while vacationing with us". I think the whole thing just needs to be put into perspective.
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    #42 AngelaPolles

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      Posted 20 July 2010 - 12:45 PM

      I don’t think that he should ask her before your wedding, if anything after you had your day in the spot light. I know I wouldn’t be very happy if my FI’s BM did that the night before my wedding. But like I said after the wedding I would be fine with!

      #43 YaelM


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        Posted 20 July 2010 - 01:12 PM

        Ok i wasnt going to comment but I think i need to. To be honest I think you are taking this way out of proportion and I have to agree with the other married ladies here, like Andi, Rachel, Niki, Ann and Carly.

        I really doubt it will take away ANYTHING from your wedding. Especially b/c you mentioned that barely any of your guests really know them. So for one minute on the day before your wedding some ppl will congratulate them but this will hardly steal your thunder. I dont mean for this to sound so harsh but in the end - on your wedding day i guarantee it will be all about you and their engagement will have ZERO impact.

        #44 Banana11

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          Posted 20 July 2010 - 01:40 PM

          Good point Andi! Maybe us married ladies can look back at our wedding and remember what mattered and what didn't.

          Just because you might get a little less attention during the week shouldn't take away from what really matters. I guess I am in the minority here because I think he should be able to propose whenever he wants. Yes they are there for your wedding but that's only one day. And unless she is a total biznatch I can't imagine someone walking around with their ring in the air making it all about them. It will still be your day! In fact, it will be whatever you make it!

          #45 jszy10

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            Posted 20 July 2010 - 01:42 PM

            I agree with Andrea too...regardless of what happens, I can't see her flaunting it around on your wedding day or any of the events that you have!

            #46 MDLady

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              Posted 20 July 2010 - 03:40 PM

              I'm on the fence about this since I do think that I'd be annoyed a little. If they are there for several days, why not do it on any other day? As the gf, I would also want to spend the day with my new fiance rather than at someone else's wedding... I just think it's unnecessary to do it right there and then. Is it the end of the world? No. But is it the most tactful thing to do? IMO, not at all.

              #47 hat0112

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                Posted 20 July 2010 - 04:07 PM

                Originally Posted by carolina24
                as for the one about the friend proposing before the wedding and telling his then FI not to talk about it or wear her ring?!?!? WTF?? what is wrong with guys sometimes? could you imagine if your FI had proposed and said "but honey you can't talk about it or wear your ring till AFTER their wedding
                Lol... This made me laugh. If my FI told me i couldn't wear my ring when he proposed I would have laughed and wore it anyway.

                Originally Posted by carly
                You really think the entire week is about you (bride & groom)? Do you dedicate an entire week to every wedding that you go to? Then I don't really think it's fair to expect others to do the same.

                I don't think that the entire week is all about the bride and groom but I think that they should be respectful the day before and of course the day of the wedding should be about the bride and groom.

                Will it kill him if he waits until after the wedding (I mean the actual wedding, not after the wedding week)? He can still do it at the destination, just wait till after. I don't see the big deal with that.

                And I do think it it interesting that all the women that had their wedding already are ok with it.
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                #48 KimberlyFrye

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                  Posted 20 July 2010 - 04:09 PM

                  I'm one of those people who would be super annoyed by it too, so I understand. I don't think you're being unreasonable, it IS your day. :)

                  #49 teshy1

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                    Posted 20 July 2010 - 04:11 PM

                    I think it's easy for those looking in from the outside to say it's no big deal and won't take away from your big day, but in all honesty, if I was in your position, I think I'd be a bit annoyed. Also, even though this couple is on a vacation, it's still also for your DW. If I were the one getting engaged, I don't think I'd want my engagement to be tied into someone else's DW. Just my thoughts.

                    #50 CanadianLindsey

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                      Posted 20 July 2010 - 04:57 PM

                      I would be very annoyed too if someone did this to me (and it could happen as all of the groomsman at my DW are unmarried but in long term relationships!).
                      But the first thought that went through my head was how will his gf feel? When my FI proposed to me it was on a weekend trip a couple hours away from our house, just the two of us in the mountains, and it meant a lot to me that he did it like that. I think this guy is taking the easy route out by using his buddy's DW to propose. He should really get creative and do something special for her, not just use all of your efforts and planning for his own means. It is kind of selfish and she may even be emabarrassed to tell her friends/family where and when he did it. Maybe if you tell him this angle he will change his mind? Good Luck!!

                      Does anyone know of a couple that got engaged at another wedding? How did that go over??

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