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Can You Un-Invite People once you tell them you're going to invite them?


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#11 msmarmar123

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    Posted 13 July 2010 - 02:37 PM

    Quote:
    Originally Posted by miss_delerium
    I understand this situation! My godfather/uncle who sent me this: http://bestdestinati....ml#post1354465 book, I didn't really want to invite. I don't think he'd come, but on the off-chance he did, I didn't want him there. But then my mom was all upset because its her brother. Why do wedding invites have to get so political?
    OMG!!! That is horrible...I don't even know what to say to that....
    what did your mom say after he sent that to you? does she get why you might not want him there?

    #12 miss_delerium

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      Posted 13 July 2010 - 02:52 PM

      Quote:
      Originally Posted by msmarmar123
      OMG!!! That is horrible...I don't even know what to say to that....
      what did your mom say after he sent that to you? does she get why you might not want him there?
      That was a really weird time. It was 10 years ago - I was 19 and had just moved out with my BF. My mom's side of the family (of which I'm also the oldest grandchild) is very religous and didn't agree that I was "living with a boy" that I wasn't married to, so they all kinda disowned me - INCLUDING my mom! (my dad was the only person who offered any kind of support). My grandpa actually told my mom that he didn't want me at their place for Christmas dinner!! So I don't really want to invite ANY of her side of the family. They have all since mellowed out, as their kids grew up and they've been exposed to how things acutally work in the world now - hello it's not 1950 anymore, but I still haven't forgotten how I was treated for 3 years of my life.

      Sorry for kinda ranting and hi-jacking your thread


      #13 islandbride317

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        Posted 13 July 2010 - 02:55 PM

        @ Miss_Delerium -- your Uncle sounds like a royal a-hole (NICE book, btw, and if it WAS a joke, he should have made it clear that it was!) and I 110% support you in not wanting him there, since he obviously doesn't support your relationship choices anyway!

        SO again MSMARMAR123, just remember that it is YOUR special day with your fiance, and there shouldn't be anyone invited who will make you feel unhappy, uncomfortable or in the least bit stressed just by their presence.

        Look at it this way: If YOU made someone really uncomfortable, do you think they would invite YOU to THEIR wedding, just because they thought they had to?! Probably not, so try to remember that when sending out those envelopes!

        #14 miss_delerium

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          Posted 13 July 2010 - 03:03 PM

          Quote:
          Originally Posted by islandbride317
          SO again MSMARMAR123, just remember that it is YOUR special day with your fiance, and there shouldn't be anyone invited who will make you feel unhappy or uncomfortable.

          Look at it this way: If YOU made someone really uncomfortable, do you think they would invite YOU to THEIR wedding, just because they thought they had to?! Probably not, so try to remember that when sending out those envelopes!
          This is the perfect way to look at it! Now if only you could tell my mom that...

          #15 msmarmar123

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            Posted 13 July 2010 - 03:12 PM

            Quote:
            Originally Posted by miss_delerium
            This is the perfect way to look at it! Now if only you could tell my mom that...

            I'll tell your mom if you want to tell mine and FI's families.....it's so much easier to tell people you've never met "bad" news than people you do know..

            #16 msmarmar123

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              Posted 13 July 2010 - 03:13 PM

              Quote:
              Originally Posted by miss_delerium
              That was a really weird time. It was 10 years ago - I was 19 and had just moved out with my BF. My mom's side of the family (of which I'm also the oldest grandchild) is very religous and didn't agree that I was "living with a boy" that I wasn't married to, so they all kinda disowned me - INCLUDING my mom! (my dad was the only person who offered any kind of support). My grandpa actually told my mom that he didn't want me at their place for Christmas dinner!! So I don't really want to invite ANY of her side of the family. They have all since mellowed out, as their kids grew up and they've been exposed to how things acutally work in the world now - hello it's not 1950 anymore, but I still haven't forgotten how I was treated for 3 years of my life.

              Sorry for kinda ranting and hi-jacking your thread
              Hi-Jack Away...isn't the whole point of this forum for advice and bridal rants :)
              It's much easier talking to other B2Bs going through similar things than some of your friends that aren't.

              #17 Monique

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                Posted 13 July 2010 - 03:22 PM

                OMG...what a hard positions to be in...like the others said if you haven't sent out formal invites or save the dates I would not sweat it...this is the very reason we have decided to elope...the planning was giving me such aniexty and between my mom and grandma saying who needed to be there...I had enough...Good luck on which ever way you decide to handle it!

                #18 cross

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                  Posted 13 July 2010 - 03:27 PM

                  I had a similar problem when I got married the first time. My dad's mom and sister thought I could do so much better that they complained leading up to the wedding. So I did not invite them because why would they want to come to a wedding they had expressed doubt over. They were super mad and did not speak to me for 7 years. Now my parents insisted that I invite them, even though FI and I are footing the bill, and guess what my crazy aunt is coming all the way to Mexico. So you have to be careful because they just might show up and then who knows what...

                  On a side note, my 2 BFFs have already told me that they will take care of any situations she tries to create. I just hope the photographer is around to get pictures if happens. I would love to see them take her down. Sorry I got a little carried away!

                  #19 msmarmar123

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                    Posted 13 July 2010 - 04:46 PM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by cross

                    On a side note, my 2 BFFs have already told me that they will take care of any situations she tries to create. I just hope the photographer is around to get pictures if happens. I would love to see them take her down. Sorry I got a little carried away!
                    That's awesome :)

                    #20 fallfromgrace

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                      Posted 20 July 2010 - 05:40 PM

                      So is there anyone on this thread that wants to "Un-invite" my grandmother? I will "Un-invite" one of their guests. :) haha...I loved that idea.




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