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yumyum90

Best Man Passes Away

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Wow, I'm so sorry this has happened. I hope your FI is OK. Both ideas you mentioned are beautiful and respectful, but if I was there and saw that chair with his picture on it, I wouldn't be able to tear my eyes away from it or stop crying through the whole ceremony! Sure, I may be overly sensitive to loss, but what if there are others just like me at your wedding? You might also consider just doing the poem and having a special toast in his honour?

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What a terrible situation. I like the idea of a poem and maybe a toast. I'm with Lucy and think that an empty chair to stare at the entire ceremony would make me pretty emotional. I am sorry for your loss.

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Im very sorry for your loss...its so hard when sadness comes at a time prepared for celebration..the idea of an empty chair makes me too sad...its already going to be in people's minds and hearts that hes not physically there, but i think the empty chair just emphasizes it..my father passed away a few years ago and i plan on reading a short poem..i found this one that i liked... you can also keep it generic to include other loved ones you have lost in the past..

 

In Memory Wedding Poem

 

We wish that ______ could be with us

this very special day,

He/She was like a rush of sun

before he went away.

 

We light this candle so that we

might bring him here awhile,

as we remember his bright flame,

his laughter and his smile.

 

We wish that he could share with us

the happiness we feel,

cause knowing that he knew our joy

would make it all more real.

 

But even though he's not with us,

his presence is still strong,

cause in our hearts we'll always find

his love for which we long.

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I am very sorry to hear about your loss.

 

I think that it is a beautiful idea to honor him. Both ideas, petals and the poem, would be a nice touch.

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Thanks for all of your condolensces and suggestions. I hadn't thought of a toast or a poem so I will talk those options over with my luv and see which one he would be most comfortable with. It has been hard to deal with especially because he left 2 young children behind. I just want to make sure we honor him in the right way and don't make people too overly emotional or sad. My fiance has been dealing with alot in general because his mother is also terminally ill and she will not be able to to make it to the ceremony.

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My FIL passed away while we were engaged. DH wrote a poem for him that we had printed in the back of our program. His Aunt then read the poem as we sat down to dinner and did a toast to him.

 

Honestly, it was a perfect way to acknowledge him without bringing down the celebratory mood of the wedding. Since the father of the groom doesn't have an assigned "job" at the ceremony, we didn't do anything visually there for that. I have seen a candle in place of a groomsman before and thought that was appropriate. Rose petals are a good idea since a candle may blow out.

 

I'm sorry for the loss of someone so important in your lives. Take care.

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oh my gosh thats so sad sad.gif i like the idea of rose petals, or maybe even a single rose carried by your FI and placed on the sand where he was supposed to stand?

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