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How do I include future SILs in ceremony?

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14 replies to this topic

#11 JanineA

  • Sr. Member
  • 2,482 posts

    Posted 12 June 2010 - 04:19 PM

    Mhabas, glad to see you are sorting it out. Perhaps the last one can read a blessing...you know just after you are pronounced husband and wife, she can read a short blessing then give you each a kiss on the cheek. Not sure what type of ceremony you are having. I'm sure you will figure it out. Glad to see we have all been of some help.

    #12 lesley_mexico_bride

    • Jr. Member
    • 230 posts

      Posted 27 September 2010 - 03:56 PM

      I am having a similar situation. My fiance has one sister who is 30 ( we are 26) and she is going to have a baby in Nov and lives across the country. My fiance was a "bridesmaid" in her wedding (seriously, ha). I already have 7 bridesmaids, and right now my fiance only has 3 groomsmen (although they are all well over 6'3 so they take up more space!). My fiance is considering asking his brother in law, her husband, to be in the wedding, since he has known him over 10 years. My fiance's mom asked the other day if we were going to include them. I just feel I already have 7 girls and I don't think his sister will be all into ordering and wearing the dress or hanging out with 7 girls who are younger and she doesn't know or feel obligated to participate in all those activities. My fiance said he could have her on his side, but wouldn't that be embarrassing for a girl?? I know I could include her in a reading but I don't know. I guess I could also invite her to come over to the wedding site earlier (the bridesmaids and I are taking a boat to the location and relaxing at a spa and beach with lunch before getting ready). I do like her a lot so I don't want to hurt her feelings if this would, what do yall think?

      #13 ChicagoBride2011

      • Jr. Member
      • 277 posts

        Posted 06 November 2010 - 01:23 PM

        Ladies I know how you feel.  My fiance pressured me into having his sister as a bridesmaid.  I wanted to just have her do a reading or be part of the wedding in a different way and he fought me on it.  I gave in to end the discussion, but now I wish I would have stuck to my gun.  She was very excited when I asked her but hasn't been involved since and flat out told me she doesn't like the color I picked out for BM dresses and suggested a color that she would look better in.  She's also a bit older than me and my 2 other friends in the wedding, she's 35 we're 26-28 and it just doens't seem to be working out.  It's too late now, unless she backs out haha.

        Had the most AMAZING wedding at The Royal PDC on May 1, 2011

        #14 richarsd

        • Jr. Member
        • 331 posts

          Posted 07 November 2010 - 08:52 AM

          I think this is a great idea and good compromise. I totally agree with your reasons for not including them directly by being attendants (if 6 is too many for you and you're not close, you shouldn't have to pick them "just because"). Goodluck :)

          Originally Posted by ChicagoPT 

          thanks girls!! all of this helps. so Im thinking one will read a bible verse, one will read the sand ceremony, and the other..not sure yet.

          #15 echraide

          • Jr. Member
          • 152 posts

            Posted 07 November 2010 - 11:30 AM


            Ugh, I feel your pain. my FSIL is a little nuts and my 2 sisters are all i'm having in my wedding party. I love the ideas in here, but not sure what I'll do either. Have you made your final decision on the whole matter ChicagoBride?

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