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#3271 Feb2013

Feb2013
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  • 57 posts

    Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:38 AM

    Originally Posted by Goldielochs47 

    I am getting married on Feb 17 at EDR. Who did you pick for your photographer? We are only doing a vow renewal (25 years) but we still haven't picked a photog and it will just be us! Maybe my Mom and daughter.

    We are using Sarani she was awesome. We met her when we were down there doing a site visit. A lot of brides on here have used her. She does really good work. 



    #3272 jnitschke

    jnitschke
    • Jr. Member
    • 251 posts

      Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:12 AM

      Sorry.. you have to deal with that... just remember to breathe, and while it hurts that friends- who are important to you- don't value your wedding above their other concerns.. My FI's aunt and uncle said they couldn't go because they already planned a trip to Chile in 2013... utter crap because we've been engaged for two years-and she was at the engagement party when we said we'd be doing a destination wedding.  Another friend said that she's decided that she'd rather take a trip to Ireland on her own this summer... then not even a half second later said she wasn't sure if she'd be able to afford going to Mexico in May... I feel like we all have friends with those kinds of "concerns".... But, the day isn't about them... and the day being about you is something to be very happy about.  ... that being said... remind me of this in March when all of my room payments are due and I'm angry at the people who back out... or when I'm disappointed that I don't have the numbers I wanted.

       

      That being said... those of you who have been through this and had people you cared about back out of attending... When it came down to it.. on the day did you care if those people weren't there?... I've got to think that things will be so crazy and exciting that you won't be able to think of anything but the moment.  Or at least... that's what I keep telling myself.

       

      Quote:

      Originally Posted by mstigger 

      So, I feel a mini-melt down coming. I'm just really fed up with so called friends complaining about the cost of attending my wedding. REALLY?? It's my wedding, and while you are invited it in no way means you have to be there. How about someone who is supposedly one of my "best friends" saying her boyfriend wanted to know how we can "expect" them to pay that kind of money to go to our wedding. Have I mentioned this is my 3rd marriage? I know that's a lot, but first time was my baby daddy who was abusive.....took 10 years of that and had enough. Second time was a minor lapse in judgement....he stole some of my 401k and gave it to his ex-wife. As I told my family, my picker has been broke for years!!! So Chuck and I went to high school together and I feel like I finally got it right......it just took some trials and tribulations to get there. We both wanted to get married on the beach and we wanted it to be small. I still sent out numerous invitations knowing most would not attend. I just don't get this kind of friendship....it is unbelievable. My MOH is actually a girl we graduated with and her and I reconnected last year while I was debating rekindling things with Chuck. She was great then and has been great now. She is actually making my bouquet out of shells - took that project on all by herself!! So, my local friends have done nothing. Offered no help of any kind and the one friend who I really thought would help me out has been MIA. My mother is attending the wedding and we are close, but she's been no help either. No input, no suggestions, nothing. I'm a hot mess right now!! I think this is what I need!!!

      With my son leaving for basic in 20 days, I'm kind of stumped on the whole wedding thing. I have no motivation and just feel so frustrated and irritated!!

       

      Think all that's normal?? Sorry for the long dialogue, just needed to vent!!!



      #3273 AllieH

      AllieH
      • Resort/Area Ambassadors
      • 2,014 posts
      • Wedding Date:November 5, 2012
      • Wedding Location:El Dorado Royale, Riviera Maya MX
      • LocationAtlanta, GA

      Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:29 AM

      oh Gale, I'm so sorry you're dealing with this. It's certainly not unusual for any wedding, especially a destination wedding, but it sure does suck. You can't let the local friends and the ones who are whining about cost steal your happiness. It sounds like you've been through a lot to find the right one, and dang it, you deserve to be able to celebrate your marriage exactly how you want. With that said, you have to accept that people are crappy, and not everyone will be happy for you. And not everyone will be there on your wedding day - they will be the ones missing you, NOT YOU. But those that DO go, those are real friends. They are the ones who will be there for you and support your marriage. You will have an amazing time, it'll be beautiful, and you'll have a great time with those who make the effort.

       

      Don't let their issues get you down. You can't control how they act, react, or respond to a destination wedding. You can control how you respond and handle the situation.

       

      With your son heading off to basic, that's added stress. So spend the next 20 days focused on your family - your core family. Let the wedding drama float on by and focus on what's most important. The drama & stress they are causing just isn't worth it. Hang in there!!

       

      Originally Posted by mstigger 

      So, I feel a mini-melt down coming. I'm just really fed up with so called friends complaining about the cost of attending my wedding. REALLY?? It's my wedding, and while you are invited it in no way means you have to be there. How about someone who is supposedly one of my "best friends" saying her boyfriend wanted to know how we can "expect" them to pay that kind of money to go to our wedding. Have I mentioned this is my 3rd marriage? I know that's a lot, but first time was my baby daddy who was abusive.....took 10 years of that and had enough. Second time was a minor lapse in judgement....he stole some of my 401k and gave it to his ex-wife. As I told my family, my picker has been broke for years!!! So Chuck and I went to high school together and I feel like I finally got it right......it just took some trials and tribulations to get there. We both wanted to get married on the beach and we wanted it to be small. I still sent out numerous invitations knowing most would not attend. I just don't get this kind of friendship....it is unbelievable. My MOH is actually a girl we graduated with and her and I reconnected last year while I was debating rekindling things with Chuck. She was great then and has been great now. She is actually making my bouquet out of shells - took that project on all by herself!! So, my local friends have done nothing. Offered no help of any kind and the one friend who I really thought would help me out has been MIA. My mother is attending the wedding and we are close, but she's been no help either. No input, no suggestions, nothing. I'm a hot mess right now!! I think this is what I need!!!

      With my son leaving for basic in 20 days, I'm kind of stumped on the whole wedding thing. I have no motivation and just feel so frustrated and irritated!!

       

      Think all that's normal?? Sorry for the long dialogue, just needed to vent!!!


       

      Official El Dorado Royale/El Dorado Casitas Royale Thread <---check here for all info about EDR/EDCR

      Wright Travel Agency <--for all your Destination Wedding needs! Contact the experts and reduce your stress. 

      El Dorado Royale Brides Thread <---come chat with other EDR brides

      AllieH's EDR 11-5-2012 Planning Thread <--because it was so awesome


      #3274 AllieH

      AllieH
      • Resort/Area Ambassadors
      • 2,014 posts
      • Wedding Date:November 5, 2012
      • Wedding Location:El Dorado Royale, Riviera Maya MX
      • LocationAtlanta, GA

      Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:31 AM

      The only one I missed not being there was my sister (who declared it wasn't practical for her to come to the wedding...). And it was a brief thing - "dang, wish she was here. oh well, party on!"

      Originally Posted by jnitschke 

      That being said... those of you who have been through this and had people you cared about back out of attending... When it came down to it.. on the day did you care if those people weren't there?... I've got to think that things will be so crazy and exciting that you won't be able to think of anything but the moment.  Or at least... that's what I keep telling myself.


       

      Official El Dorado Royale/El Dorado Casitas Royale Thread <---check here for all info about EDR/EDCR

      Wright Travel Agency <--for all your Destination Wedding needs! Contact the experts and reduce your stress. 

      El Dorado Royale Brides Thread <---come chat with other EDR brides

      AllieH's EDR 11-5-2012 Planning Thread <--because it was so awesome


      #3275 LKocelko

      LKocelko
      • Jr. Member
      • 350 posts

        Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:57 AM

        Originally Posted by mstigger 

        So, I feel a mini-melt down coming. I'm just really fed up with so called friends complaining about the cost of attending my wedding. REALLY?? It's my wedding, and while you are invited it in no way means you have to be there. How about someone who is supposedly one of my "best friends" saying her boyfriend wanted to know how we can "expect" them to pay that kind of money to go to our wedding. Have I mentioned this is my 3rd marriage? I know that's a lot, but first time was my baby daddy who was abusive.....took 10 years of that and had enough. Second time was a minor lapse in judgement....he stole some of my 401k and gave it to his ex-wife. As I told my family, my picker has been broke for years!!! So Chuck and I went to high school together and I feel like I finally got it right......it just took some trials and tribulations to get there. We both wanted to get married on the beach and we wanted it to be small. I still sent out numerous invitations knowing most would not attend. I just don't get this kind of friendship....it is unbelievable. My MOH is actually a girl we graduated with and her and I reconnected last year while I was debating rekindling things with Chuck. She was great then and has been great now. She is actually making my bouquet out of shells - took that project on all by herself!! So, my local friends have done nothing. Offered no help of any kind and the one friend who I really thought would help me out has been MIA. My mother is attending the wedding and we are close, but she's been no help either. No input, no suggestions, nothing. I'm a hot mess right now!! I think this is what I need!!!

        With my son leaving for basic in 20 days, I'm kind of stumped on the whole wedding thing. I have no motivation and just feel so frustrated and irritated!!

         

        Think all that's normal?? Sorry for the long dialogue, just needed to vent!!!

         

        You really learn a lot about people's true colors when planning a wedding, any type of wedding, but especially a DW. I had some family issues come up the first few weeks we were engaged, and I was crying at least once a week during that time from the stress. But then I reached the "screw it" point, and decided it's THEIR loss if they won't be there. And when they see the pictures, they're gonna regret it. Life is about priorities, and if someone REALLY wanted to be there, they would figure something out. Put yourself in their shoes, yes it is expensive, but would you figure out a way to be there for them? I would if it was someone important. So this is just a good life lesson to learn about who your true and real friends our. As our photographers told us, "Those who matter won't mind, and those who mind don't matter." Cliche, but very true for these situations. You don't want people like that at your big day anyways, they would be downers. You just have to get to the point where you think "Well I'm sorry you're choosing to act this way, but it is your choice and I'm gonna have an amazing time." Stay strong!



        #3276 jnitschke

        jnitschke
        • Jr. Member
        • 251 posts

          Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:59 AM

          Ok.. I bought bubble tube 8ct packs at the dollar tree... and then on clearance I scored two bubble machines.. I'm going to put the bubble machines at the front of the aisles and tell the people sitting by them to turn them on when the person says "Man and Wife"..

          these are the pictures that are my inspiration for using the bubbles... and a lot of them...



          Thoughts on bubbles ladies?

          Found these really cute pink bubble bottles with hearts on them. 24 bottles for $2.89 and I love me some bubbles.

          I really am a big kid!!

          Thanks!!



          #3277 jnitschke

          jnitschke
          • Jr. Member
          • 251 posts

            Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:17 AM

            Has anyone done a hand-fasting.. or thinking of doing a hand-fasting and knows some good links for ceremonies?  My FI and I aren't religious at all and we're doing a symbolic ceremony.  So far hand-fasting is the only real "ceremony" like thing that I've really found.. I like the sand ceremony too, but I'm a bit afraid that the sand will just get shook up on the way home.   Any other good ceremony ideas out there?
             



            #3278 jnitschke

            jnitschke
            • Jr. Member
            • 251 posts

              Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:22 AM

              Another question... sorry for posting so many of these...

               

              what kind of footware are your men wearing?  Does sand get inside the Men's dress shoes?  Should he be wearing sandals?  and if they're wearing sandals has anyone found any that look at least a little bit more formal?
               



              #3279 LKocelko

              LKocelko
              • Jr. Member
              • 350 posts

                Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:27 AM

                Originally Posted by jnitschke 

                Has anyone done a hand-fasting.. or thinking of doing a hand-fasting and knows some good links for ceremonies?  My FI and I aren't religious at all and we're doing a symbolic ceremony.  So far hand-fasting is the only real "ceremony" like thing that I've really found.. I like the sand ceremony too, but I'm a bit afraid that the sand will just get shook up on the way home.   Any other good ceremony ideas out there?
                 

                We are doing a sand ceremony, but not with a vase, with a shadow box. A lot of these come with "keeper plates" that stop the sand from shifting. Just a thought.



                #3280 LKocelko

                LKocelko
                • Jr. Member
                • 350 posts

                  Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:38 AM



                  Another question... sorry for posting so many of these...

                   

                  what kind of footware are your men wearing?  Does sand get inside the Men's dress shoes?  Should he be wearing sandals?  and if they're wearing sandals has anyone found any that look at least a little bit more formal?
                   

                   






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