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damaris

Should've put a guest limit on the invitations!!

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My guess is that people just don't think it is costing you extra since it is an AI resort. And most people are just stupid when it comes to RSVPing for weddings ;-p

 

I agree that only the people on the invitation are allowed to come to the wedding and other wedding parties that you are paying additional for. Maybe send a polite note to the people who have RSVPd that says something with this essence: You and FI truly appreciate their presence, time, money, etc. to come to your wedding. The wedding and other activities are private events reserved for those guests listed on the invitations. All of the additional vacationers can enjoy the resort activities or other fun cancun stuff during the private events. And that you are looking forward to all of your guests enjoying their vacation with their family and friends.

 

Oh and I don't think I would limit the people who you already invited. That might come off a like a take back invite.

 

But really, do what makes sense to you and FI. Good luck!

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I put a guest limit on my AHR invites and people STILL didn't listen and proceed to bring up to 4 uninvited guests!!!!!!! This is a traditional, plated dinner AHR! So ridiculous! I don't understand people!

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Oh my goodness Damaris...what a nightmare!!! The cousin's wife with the plus 5 gets the prize for the biggest balls I have EVER heard of in my life..excuse my french!! LOL Ay, yay, yay...I think at some point you may just have to say...no. That is what I did. I mean...some of these folks are testing the limit of what is common sense. I hope it all works out for you.

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I totally know what you mean about people having common sense. We're having our legal ceremony before going down to Cabo for our symbolic wedding. We have only invited parents to the legal ceremony and FI's mom said a few weeks ago "so and so have decided they are coming to the legal ceremony instead of Mexico" Thank gosh FI said "they weren't invited, they don't have that option!" haha

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first of all, off topic: kris, your siggy pic is amazing! who was your photog?

 

damaris, wow, it really seems like everyone has this happen to them with a DW ... i agree it's bc people think the wedding doesn't cost you anything bc the resorts are AI. thankfully we only got hit with two additional guests, and i at least knew them (longtime friends of the family), so i ended up actually sending them invites.

 

i think autumn hit the nail on the head with what you have to tell people ... they are welcome to bring along whomever they'd like to enjoy the vacation with them, but the wedding events are intimate, private affairs.

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OMG! Damaris- you can't make this stuff up... and people wonder why we turn into BRIDEZILLAS!!. That's so crazy. Why are people so inconsiderate?

 

Have a conversation with FI and maybe you two can come up with ideas to tackle the issue. Instead of having a welcome dinner for all maybe you can have a welcome reception where guests meet after dinner for some drinks.

 

Feel free to vent... this planning stuff has me wishing we just went to city hall.

 

Damaris- have all of the rsvp'd guests booked their air/ rooms? We had a lot of initial interest but a few people have dropped due to finances. You might get a few that may not come after all.

 

smile03.gif

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Quote:
Originally Posted by stachr View Post
I totally know what you mean about people having common sense. We're having our legal ceremony before going down to Cabo for our symbolic wedding. We have only invited parents to the legal ceremony and FI's mom said a few weeks ago "so and so have decided they are coming to the legal ceremony instead of Mexico" Thank gosh FI said "they weren't invited, they don't have that option!" haha
Haha, I love your response!!

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Quote:
Originally Posted by stachr View Post
I totally know what you mean about people having common sense. We're having our legal ceremony before going down to Cabo for our symbolic wedding. We have only invited parents to the legal ceremony and FI's mom said a few weeks ago "so and so have decided they are coming to the legal ceremony instead of Mexico" Thank gosh FI said "they weren't invited, they don't have that option!" haha
omg stacey, your FI is totally a keeper for nipping that in the bud!!! and you both should talk to your parents about not mentioning the legal day to anyone and keeping it secret. i think if family/guests start finding out that mexico isn't "the real deal," it could cause a problem for you. it's ultimately why we chose to have our legal ceremony in mexico ... our family wouldn't have understood, or worse, been pissed off! i'm so jealous of the people who can get the legal crap out of the way easily at home!

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Wow! This just makes me nervous! We're already thinking we'll be between 80 and 100 - have heard the same complaints about how we must not want anyone there... but I know at least on of his friends already said she invited another couple to come along! My fiance is furious already. Good luck keeping everything in check!

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Originally Posted by damaris View Post
Ok so I'm going crazy and I'm stressed. When me and FI decided to do a destination wedding our family members said we were inconsiderate. They said "You must not want anyone there , it's too expensive". Now it seems not only are they going but they are bringing extra guests!!!

Initially I assumed our guest count would be around 60 people. I come from a huge Dominican family so most of those guest were mine. I sent out around 95 invites(this was cut down from 150) just knowing that I would get a lot of nos. Well to my surprise people are saying yes and oh by the way I'm also bringing the kids and MIL so that she can babysit. WTH!!!!!! Or my bridesmaid who RSVP'd for 2 but I find out from her Mom, who was not invited that she is also now coming. huh.gif? Or my personal fave, my Cousin's Wife who kindly told me her Husband can't go but its her plus 5. I was so upset that I was venting at a friend's BBq yesterday (he RSVP'd for him and his wife) and he overheard me so he decided to tell me that they're bringing their son and a Nanny, but not to worry she's not going to the wedding. Ok so when was he gonna tell me this?

I appreciate that people love us enough to want to spend our wedding with us. What I'm having an issue with is that people are not using common sense to ask me is it ok for me to bring guest #3 or 4 or in some cases 5. Or that they are RSVPing for one amount and are planning to show up with another. Like I said my estimate at the beginning was 60 and right now with the maybe's its at 103 people. shots.gif

Needed to vent!!!
I fell you on the ka-ching. You should ask your cousin's wife, "So, are your friends gonna be okay with you coming to the wedding without them? or so how did you friends react when you told them they wouldn't be able to attend the wedding? or Are your friends gonna be okay hanging out while you're at the wedding? LMAO! The nerve. I would be it right back on her."

Quote:
Originally Posted by stachr View Post
I totally know what you mean about people having common sense. We're having our legal ceremony before going down to Cabo for our symbolic wedding. We have only invited parents to the legal ceremony and FI's mom said a few weeks ago "so and so have decided they are coming to the legal ceremony instead of Mexico" Thank gosh FI said "they weren't invited, they don't have that option!" haha
Yay for your FI!!!!! That's awesome! What would make them believe they were even invited? Wow!

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