confessed too much - please delete thread

[*HOLLY*]

If you guys are really open maybe bring it up but honestly I know my now husband would be hurt.

This is what he chose for you and only you. I see beautiful rings all the time I would love but the one I have is perfect because it is from him!

Good Luck!

[giraffexx]

If it is really bothering you that much I would be honest and tell him how you're feeling about the ring. You never know he may surprise you and upgrade it for you as a wedding or anniversary present.

[dianep]

i'm totally with giraffexx! i'm surprised no one mentioned it earlier! depending on your jeweler's upgrade specs, it could be a great opportunity for him to upgrade it for you in the future. but i would definitely leave it up to him! maybe he couldn't shell out the extra $$ for a better quality right now, or did he chose that particular diamond because he thought it was the one?

[NaM]

Maybe I'm more symbolic than you but the ering is supposed to represent your love and committment. Would you really be ok going behind his back and not telling him you changed something like that? I dunno it just seems like a bad omen to start a marriage.

I think it's ok to want to upgrade but you should definitely talk to him about. And if you think it'll hurt his feelings then is a diamond that sparkles abit more, more important to you than your FI feelings??

[damaris]

Ok so here is my story, I wanted a cushion cut E-Ring from day one. I told FI and showed him. even joked with him that the day he wanted to get me my ring he should take my BFF with him. Well he went on his own and I received a Princess cut, not what I wanted but honestly like many brides posted you learn to love your ring for what it means, and I will honestly say I LOOOOOve that ring, that is till we went to get my wedding band and I fell in love with another E-ring that was way out of our budget. I made the mistake of ooohing and ahhhing and trying on this ring. My FI the man that he is went ahead and made plans to buy me my upgraded ring. I will honestly say that in hindsight I wouldn't do that today. Like many of you I agree that the rings meaning and the relationship is worth more then clarity and carats. I will say that he has never complained about the upgrade because he always said that my first ring was a "starter ring" but my point is I loved that first ring and all that it meant.

 

Hope this help as someone who upgraded and now wishes she hadn't

[JanineA]

I have to agree with many of the other ladies, Nadine and Ana. I don't think you should go behind his back and upgrade. I recently helped my best friend pick out an engagement ring for his fiance and I know what you mean by the specs you can see, they are called feathers. It is very rare that a diamond doesn't have a mark, its what makes them unique unless you get a flawless diamond. Even if you get a VS1 there will still be markings on it, granted they may not be visible to the naked eye. I think you should talk to you FI about it. Be honest but also be prepared for his honesty in return. If your jeweler is one that does upgrades discuss that option with him but really think to yourself first wether it is that important. Its the thought behind the ring and the promise to love and cherish you, not the ring itself.

[LadyTrunck]

I am not a sentimental person, so I would defnitely trade up if in the future I wanted something different. I defnitely agree with the other ladies that you should talk to him about it. Communication is key- FI and I have both talked about upgrading mine in the future.

 

Just do what is best for you and FI!!

[LadyTrunck]

Quote:

Originally Posted by NaM And if you think it'll hurt his feelings then is a diamond that sparkles abit more, more important to you than your FI feelings??

I also definitely agree with this... people are so different. In my situation, as I said, FI is like me and not only is he not offended nor hurt, but he has encouraged it for the future. Do you think it would hurt his feelings?

[JanineA]

LadyTrunck I've seen your posts a few times but just had to stop and tell you the bunnies always make me smile! Too cute!

[bikegirl]

I wouldn't do it. He didn't spend the $500-1000 for a ring with better specs because he chose not to and I believe if he's purchasing it, he has final say. Although it's nice when your fiance seeks your input, I feel like it loses all its meaning if you dictate how much more he should spend or how much bigger the diamond should be. When you think about it....the guy is spending a huge chunk of money on a ring AND in most cases, contributing to the wedding budget so it's not small change.

 

My ring is under 1/2 carat. I'm betting it's probably one of the smallest ones on here but I LOVE it. It's the one my fiance loved and knew I would love, within his budget, that is. You're planning to be with this guy for the rest of your life, right? There's plenty of time to upgrade for your 5 year, 10 year, etc, etc, anniversaries. That is the beauty of getting married, you can GROW together and hey...so can your ring.