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confessed too much - please delete thread


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#1 Boo

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    Posted 14 April 2010 - 06:07 AM

    delete



    #2 Tam

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      Posted 14 April 2010 - 09:19 AM

      THat's a tough one... What do you think his reactions would be to upgrading?? If you think he'll be upset and you still really want it, then maybe do it yourself.. Is this something he will notice?.. if you change it?
      I don't like the idea of keeping it from him, so maybe try talking to him and see what he says.. Another option is to talk about it and just upgrade it yourself. I actually would like to do that with my ring too... but I have a feeling he won't be too happy about it. So my whole thought on it was to pay for the upgrade myself.. I had been deciding between two different settings and ended up picking the cheaper of the two because I felt guilty, but now I wish I had gotten the one I really loved, not liked.... He doesn't know I feel this way either, but at some point I will tell him...
      Communication is the best way.. you never know, he may surprise you...

      #3 mnh1983

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        Posted 14 April 2010 - 09:24 AM

        That is a tough one. I think my fiance would be hurt if I told him I wanted an upgrade, but maybe yours wouldn't be so bothered. But, if your current ring is something you just can't live with, talk to him about it.

        #4 Ana

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        Posted 14 April 2010 - 09:46 AM

        I'm a big believer in loving the ring for what it means. Marriage and engagement is about the relationship, not the ring, and the ring he gave you is the ring that he picked. I wouldn't upgrade, but that's just my opinion.

        #5 Boo

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          Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:26 AM

          delete



          #6 *Nadine*

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            Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:47 AM

            I agree with Ana. I would be happy with what I was given and what my fiance picked out for me. It definitely would be really disrespectful and dishonest to go and have it fixed beind your FI's back. If you REALLY REALY REALLY are unhappy with it, then tell him and figure it out together.

            #7 amygirl1169

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              Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:53 AM

              I agree with Ana. I initially told my FI the size I wanted to keep costs low, but secretly now wish it was a little bigger... but really, this is the ring he proposed to me with and the moment was so special that I want to remember it every time I look at my ring.

              Instead, I went super blingy with the wedding bands! lol

              I would talk to FI if you are going to go ahead and change it.

              Good luck in your decision!

              #8 Jen_S

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                Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:55 AM

                I also would not go behind his back and get it upgraded I would talk to him about what you like and don't like and then together make a decision. My FI went up in size and has a slight flaw and I love it bc it reminds me that nothing is perfect.
                Our Honeymoon In Ireland!!

                #9 kerrij

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                  Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:56 AM

                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by Ana
                  I'm a big believer in loving the ring for what it means. Marriage and engagement is about the relationship, not the ring, and the ring he gave you is the ring that he picked. I wouldn't upgrade, but that's just my opinion.
                  Quote:
                  Originally Posted by *Nadine*
                  I agree with Ana. I would be happy with what I was given and what my fiance picked out for me. It definitely would be really disrespectful and dishonest to go and have it fixed beind your FI's back. If you REALLY REALY REALLY are unhappy with it, then tell him and figure it out together.
                  I agree with Ana and Nadine...especially about you changing it behind his back. My diamond is only just over half a K and of course i would have liked bigger before seeing my ring, but he chose it because he loved it and knew i would love it, which i absolutely do! I think he would be really hurt if you told him you weren't unhappy with it. especially since he must have spent a ton of money on it already. i know i would if the roles were reversed. IMO.

                  #10 KelZavs20

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                    Posted 14 April 2010 - 10:59 AM

                    Quote:
                    Originally Posted by Ana
                    I'm a big believer in loving the ring for what it means. Marriage and engagement is about the relationship, not the ring, and the ring he gave you is the ring that he picked. I wouldn't upgrade, but that's just my opinion.
                    I agree with this....i know that if my future hubby received his wedding band and later changed it i would be hurt....and i know he would be hurt if i told him i wanted to change anything about the ring he had made.




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